Hey Arnold!: Unrequited Love
by 1000th Ghost
Summary: Helga loves Arnold, Arnold loves Cecile, and Helga IS Ceclie. Due to a twisted series of events, Helga and Arnold become stranded together on a deserted island where secrets are uncovered and lust governs all.
1. Blissful Dreaming

Chapter 1

Blissful Dreaming

"Arnold, what a wimp, what a pathetic loser, how I despise him. And yet…" At this the blond haired, pink clothed girl glanced around to make sure she was out of earshot from where she hid, behind the dumpsters in her school's playground. Then she reached into her dress and pulled out a golden locket with a picture if a blond haired boy with a football-shaped head and started speaking to it.

"I love him. The way he always knows right from wrong. The way he always thinks of others before himself. The way his hair sticks out all weird from atop that gorgeous football head of his. If only I could find the guts to just come out with it and confess my undying love to him in some hope that he could someday feel the same way about me. If only-"

She was suddenly cut short by a loud, rasping breathing sound behind her. She stopped, annoyed, put her locket back in her dress, raised her hand, balled it into a fist, and punched the dorky intruder with glasses right in the nose.

At least, that's what _should_ have happened. But instead of her fist making contact with its target, it was caught by a strong, firm hand. The girl turned around startled and stared into the dark green eyes of the football-headed boy she had just been fantasizing about.

"Arnold?!" she gasped, completely lost in his stare. "I-I mean, quit sneakin' up on me, football head!" she shouted, her attitude completely changed.

"Helga? Is it true?"

"I-is what true?" she stammered, realizing the worst. He had heard her confession.

"You know, what you said? That you…um…love me?"

"I…well, um…I…" she said, as she desperately thought of a way to escape.

"Criminy, how can I take it back? He already heard the confession!" she thought to herself.

"Well?" Arnold asked, once again locking eyes with her.

"I…um…_guess_ that you could say that I like you…um…kind of," she whispered, strongly aware that her hand was still grasped in his. "I-I mean…well…would you get down?"

"Huh?"

"I _really_ don't need anyone to know that I'm hiding back here. You're giving me away. Get down!" she exclaimed, as she jerked him down with her hand.

"Ow! You didn't have to pull so hard!" he exclaimed, as he landed right in front of her.

"Sorry." She suddenly found a bottle cap on the ground very interesting.

"So, why are you hiding behind here anyway?"

"I thought you already figured that out."

"You mean...?"

"Uh-huh."

"So, you actually love me?"

"Doi! Of course I love you! How could I not? You're wonderfully perfect in everyway possible! I've loved you ever since the first time I saw you, which was all the way in preschool! I've loved you for _six_ of my nine years! I-I…criminy, did I just say what I think I said?"

"Um…yeah." Arnold paused. "Wow. This is a lot to take in. I don't know what to say."

"Don't play with me, Arnold. I know exactly what you're gonna say. 'I like _Li-la_, not you. Why would I like you anyway? You're always mean. Blah, blah, blah.' I don't even know why I told you anything. It's not like it makes any difference. You-you hate me." At this her eyes filled with tears, which she tried hard not to let Arnold see, but to no avail.

"Helga?" Arnold said softly, as he tilted her face towards his, "Don't cry. I never said that. I would never dream of saying that. How could I ever say that to someone like you?"

She looked at him with questioning eyes. "I don't get it."

"Maybe this will make you understand." At this he closed his eyes, and leaned in closer to her.

"Oh, my gosh, he's going to kiss me. I'm going to die," Helga thought, as she too closed her eyes.

By now they were only a couple inches from each other. They leaned in closer and closer and-


	2. Rude Awakenings

Chapter 2

Rude Awakenings

"HELGA! Are you up yet?"

"Oh, Arnold, I lov- WHAT?! Oh, criminy. Alright, Miriam, alright, I'm up! Sheesh. Right when it was getting good too."

The nine-year-old girl sleepily got out of bed and walked to her closet. She opened the door, walked in, and shut it. She clapped her hands, and instantly the entire room lit up. Amidst the colorful lights and boxes, behind a curtain of clothes, stood a pile of junk. That's what it appeared to be at first glance, but a further investigation showed that it was a sort of figure of a young boy with a football-shaped head.

"Good morning, my beloved," Helga said sleepily, kneeling in front of it. "I wish the dream I had 'twas real, and you gave unto me the feelings of love and passion that I have so long felt for you. Forever dancing our dance of everlasting romance until the end of time. Whoa, that's good," she said, as she pulled out a pink notebook from a box of many colored notebooks, all packed with poems about Arnold. She quickly wrote down the verse and then jumped up.

"Oh, criminy, school!"

She quickly pulled on a white short sleeved shirt and pink sleeveless jumper. Then she adjusted her blond hair in its two makeshift pigtails and adjusted the pink bow that she constantly wore.

"Miriam! I'm gonna be late for school!" she shouted, as she ran down the stairs. "Did you pack my lunch yet? Miriam?!"

"Huh…what?" her mom said lazily from the couch where she had been sleeping.

"My lunch, Miriam! My lunch! Did you remember to make it?"

"Oh…I was just, uh, looking for that thing…um, here it is!" she said, holding up a watermelon rind.

"Mom, that's not important right now! Now where's my lunch?!"

"Oh, oh, dear, um, let's see…" her mother said, getting up and walking around the living room. "Oh, here it is!" she said, as she pulled out a VHS box.

"Mom," Helga said, opening it up, "You packed me a plastic straw, a packet of instant oatmeal, and a tube of toothpaste."

"Oh, that's nice, de-" she mumbled, as she fell asleep once again.

"Oh, brother."


	3. Walk in the Rain

Chapter 3

Walk in the Rain

Helga stepped out of the house and into a slight drizzle.

"One of these days I might actually get an umbrella," she mumbled, as she proceeded to walk towards her school. The rain began to give way to a hard downpour, and she was soon completely soaked.

"C-criminy," she shivered, as she wrapped her arms around herself.

"I've got to get to school fast, before I die of ammonia or something," she thought, as she started to speed up, until she was running through the streets. She was just turning the corner when WHAM! She smacked into something and fell on the sidewalk.

"Arnold!"

"Oh, sorry, Helga."

"I-I mean, watch where you're goin', ya little yellow-haired shrimp!"

"Hey, I said I was sorry!" Then he noticed her appearance; her soaked dress clinging to her skin, her hair hanging limp on her shoulders, water streaming down her face. "Hey, Helga, are you okay?"

"W-what are you t-talking about, of c-course I'm okay! Why w-wouldn't I b-be?" she said, shaking from the cold.

"Well, you're soaking wet, and you look really cold," Arnold said, as he put his umbrella over her head.

"Well, I'm n-not, hair boy, and I d-don't need your pity."

"I insist," he said, as he helped her up.

"Well, um, thanks, I guess," she said in surprise. "I-I mean, whatever floats your boat, football head."


	4. Class

Chapter 4

Class

"Okay, class, today we're going to start the 'special' section on decimals in long division!"

"Awww," the class groaned.

Just then, Arnold and Helga dashed into the classroom, very wet and out of breath.

"Arnold, Helga, you're late! I hope you have a reasonable excuse," their teacher, Mr. Simmons, said.

"Dentist appointment," Helga quickly lied.

"Okay, that's fine. What about you Arnold?"

"Well…um…-"

"His bus came late. You know, cause of the rain."

"Well, I can't mark you tardy for things beyond your control. You're both excused."

"What did you do that for?" Arnold asked as they walked to their desks.

"To pay you back. We're even now."

He smiled at her as he sat down, and she sat down behind him.

"Konichiwa, Helga!" chirped a voice to the right of her.

"No Japanese this morning, Phoebe, I'm kind of having a moment. And I'm probably going to get a headache from running around in the rain."

"Oh, okay, English!"

"Arnold man, where were you really?" Arnold's best friend, Gerald, asked. "The bus didn't have any trouble. You weren't even on the bus!"

"I know, Gerald, I…um…had to collect the rent from the boarders."

"Arnold, we did that last week! Seriously, man, where were you?"

"Just…around."

"Arnold, why won't you tell me?"

"Why should I tell you?" Arnold snapped. "Can't I keep a few things to myself?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, just because we're best friends and all, doesn't mean that you have the right to know every little detail that ever goes on in my life!"

"Alright, man, chill! Sorry I asked."

"Alright, class, settle down! Let's review last night's 'special' homework assignment! Harold! Would you come up to the board and do the first problem?"

"Uh…what? Oh, yeah, okay," said the fat boy, as he walked over to the blackboard. "Okay, um, seven goes onto four two times, carry the one…Mr. Simmons! This is hard! My brain hurts!"

"Now, Harold, it really isn't that hard. Here, let me show you…"

Mr. Simmons continued to explain the problem, and pretty soon just about everyone's attention had wandered away from the lesson. Everyone except for maybe Phoebe, Helga's genius Asian friend, and Lila, the 'ever so perfect' country girl, whose sweet talk and pretty face made her the object of just about every boy's heart. Including Arnold's.

Helga reached into her pocket and pulled out her most recent pink notebook, already filled with countless love poems. She opened it to a new page, and began to write.

_There must be something more to us than_

_you and me._

_It must be tangled up somehow in_

_destiny._

_I used to think the sum of one and one_

_was two,_

_but we add up to more,_

_me and you._

_When we are close together it's so_

_plain to see,_

_together we are better than we_

_used to be._

_I don't know how to say the things I'm_

_thinking of,_

_but the something that I'm felling must be_

_love._


	5. Lunch

Chapter 5

Lunch

"Oh, look at the time!" Mr. Simmons exclaimed, just as Helga shut her book. "Okay, class, you can go to your 'special' lunch."

"Alright! Lunch! I'm starved!" Harold shouted, as he bolted out the door. The rest of the class followed.

Helga got to the cafeteria and was about to go sit down, when she spotted Arnold. She quickly hid behind a cart, packed with dirty dishes.

"Oh, Arnold! Amidst the shadows of my heart, I adore you. I long for the day I can once again kiss your divine lips and at last be content in my troubled soul. I dread the day I finally confess my love to you, yet I long for it with all my heart. Oh, Arnold, I love y- Lila!" she exclaimed, as she watched Arnold walk over to Lila's table. "What's he doing with Phony Little Miss Perfect?"

"H-hey, Lila," Arnold said, as he stood next to the table where she was eating.

"Oh, hello, Arnold! Whatever are you doing here?"

"Well, um…I was kind of wondering…I mean, if you wanted to…would you, um…go to the movies with me on Saturday?"

"Well, Arnold, I would, only…well, that seems a little too much like a date," Lila said sweetly.

"Well…that's kind of what it's supposed to be."

"Arnold, I know that you like me like me but, oh, do I _really_ have to say this again, I don't like you like you, I just like you." She smiled at him as if she had just accepted instead of refused. "I'm ever so sorry, Arnold, but I hope we can still be friends."

"Yeah, I guess," Arnold sighed unhappily, as she walked away.

"Li-la," Helga quietly taunted from behind the cart, "that evil little goody-goody two shoes! How dare she be so cruel to Arnold! She doesn't like him like him, but she still wants to be friends? That's harsh. Why doesn't she just go up to him and say, 'Oh, Arnold, by the way, I was just using you the whole time so you could shower me with attention that I never would have received otherwise because I'm a stupid little country girl with no life and a phony personality!' I mean, what does he even see in her? Just because she's nice and smart and pretty and popular, he's got this big, stupid, la dee da crush on her! I mean sure, I'm not that pretty, and I'm not popular, and I don't go around acting all nice and sweet, but that still doesn't excuse the fact that I'm the one! The one and only one who will ever truly love Arnold!" She sighed as she leaned against the cart.

Just then, she heard a loud, rasping, breathing sound from behind her. "I wonder…" she thought, as she raised her fist. Unfortunately, this was no dream; this was Brainy, popping up once again, right when she was in the middle of obsessing about Arnold. Her fist smashed into his face, and he crumpled to the floor.

"Doesn't he _ever_ learn?" she muttered, as she stood up and walked to a table.

"Hey, Pheebs."

"Hello, Helga! Um, Helga, I was wondering…do you mind if I go sit at another table today?"

"Oh, yeah, sure, Phoebe, just go desert me why don't you!"

"Oh, no, Helga, it's not like that, it's just…well…Gerald invited me to sit with him today so-"

"Oh, criminy, Phoebe! What on earth would you want to sit with Tall Hair Boy for?" Helga asked in mock amusement.

"Well…" Phoebe said, gazing across the room at the African- American boy with a humungous stack of hair, "I guess it's because I kind of like him. If you know what I mean."

"Phoebe, you're a mystery. Oh, whatever, go sit with lover boy. I don't mind."

"Oh, thanks, Helga!" Phoebe cried, as she scurried away.

"What she sees in Geraldo is almost as puzzling as what Arnold sees in Little Miss Perfect," Helga said under her breath. "Almost…but not quite."

"Hey, Helga, is this seat taken?"

"Arnold?! I mean, no, why?"

"Well, Gerald kind of kicked me off our table. He said he wanted to sit with Phoebe."

"Welcome to the club. Grab a seat."

"Thanks." Arnold sat down in the seat next to her. "Uh oh."

"What?"

"Raspberries," he said, opening his lunchbox.

"Raspberries?"

"Grandpa says I should never eat them. I don't know why, but I really don't want to find out."

"Trade ya."

"What have you got?"

"A straw, a packet of instant oatmeal, and a tube of toothpaste."

"Why don't we just use the vending machine?"

"I've got a better idea. Hey, Harold!" Helga called.

"Awe, what do you want, Madam Fortress Mommy?" the boy shouted back at her.

"Want to trade lunches?"

"Got anything good?"

"I've got a stick of peppermint, a packet of sugar, a tube of icing, and candy fruit," she lied.

"Well, that isn't much…I'll trade you a Mr. Fudgy Bar for it."

"Whatever, Pink Boy, just give me some food!"

"Fine, fine, Madam Fortress Mommy!"

"What's that even mean?" Helga asked.

"Uh…you're confusing me!"

"Moron. Hey, football head, what do you think you're doing? I got that for me, not you!" she exclaimed, watching him take a bite of the candy bar.

"Hey, I traded my lunch for that too, so I'm entitled to exactly half of it."

"Fine, but so am I."

"I already bit off it, but you can have it if you want."

"You're disgusting. And cruel."

"Alright, fine, if you don't want it," Arnold replied.

"Gimme that!" she said, shoving it in her mouth, all the while thinking, "Oh, my gosh, my lips are touching his! Well, in a manner of speaking."


	6. Partners

Chapter 6

Partners

"Okay, class, settle down. We are now going to embark on an incredible journey of teamwork and-"

"Criminy, Simmons, not another one of your lame projects!"

"Right you are, Helga! It's another one of my lam- er…'special' projects! Isn't that exciting?" The class just stared at their teacher with a bored expression on their faces. "Okay then! For this project you will be divided into teams of two-"

"_Please_ say we get to pick our partners. I don't want to be stuck working with Harold like last time."

"Well, Rhonda, this is a 'boy/girl' project, so, to avoid any broken hearts or embarrassing moments, I have chosen them for you." The class groaned. "Okay, for this project you will be split into teams of two, like I said, and in honor of National Family Month, you will be given the 'special' assignment of deciding where you will live, what you will do for a living, what you will eat, if you will have any children, if so, how many, and what you will do with them. Any questions?"

"Children? This is gonna be like being married, isn't it?" Harold groaned.

"Well, yes, but it is to celebrate the wonders of family, in honor of National Family Month!"

"Since when was it National Family Month, Mr. Simmons?"

"Well, Stinky, it has been since…um…the beginning of this month! Now, let me read off the partners. Rhonda and Curly-"

"Eek! No_ way _are you putting me with that creep," gasped Rhonda, the 'most fashionable girl in school'.

"Awe, come on, Rhonda, it won't be so bad! Well, for you maybe, but not for me!" exclaimed Curly, a rather insane kid with supposed mental issues and a _huge _crush on Rhonda.

"I'm doomed."

"Ahem, may I continue? Alright, let's see, Sheena, you will be with Eugene-"

"Oh, goody!"

"Sheena?!" exclaimed Eugene, falling out of his chair, which everyone was fairly used to because of his known reputation as a jinx. "I'm okay."

"Phoebe, you will be with Gerald."

The two of them smiled shyly across the room at each other.

"Oh, brother," Helga muttered.

"Nadine, you will be with Peapod Kid, Harold with Patty, Lila with Brainy-"

At this Helga burst out laughing.

"Helga, do you care to tell the class what you find so amusing?"

"Oh, uh, nothing," said Helga, wiping away a tear. "I just, uh, remembered something funny."

"Well, okay, but please try to keep it down. Anyway, where was I? Oh, yes, Gloria with Stinky, Helga with Arnold-"

"Arnold?!" gasped Helga, nearly falling out of her seat. The whole class turned to look at her. "Uh…yeah. Whatever. Why would I care if I have to work with the football head on this dumb project? Uh, Mr. Simmons, can I go to the bathroom?"

"Yes, Helga, but make it quick."


	7. Little Miss Perfect

Chapter 7

Little Miss Perfect

"Oh, Arnold," Helga sighed, once in the sanctuary of her stall. "Bless this rare moment when I get to be your wife! Pretend, yes, and only for one day, but still! Oh, Arnold, my beloved angel, I shall not waste another minute of this glorious opportunity. I shall march back to that classroom, and together we shall put our differences aside and work out the details of our future life together!" She sighed with happiness as she leaned against the wall. Suddenly she heard the bathroom door open and then slam shut again.

"How dare she, how dare she! She'll ruin everything! She'll ever so destroy my beautiful scheme!"

"Lila," whispered Helga, peering through a crack in the stall.

"Arnold is growing ever so more distant from me, I can feel it. He'll not be under my spell for much longer. Especially with _her_ hanging around. Well, I'll just have to take matters into my own hands. I can't let Helga win so easily. She'll not steal Arnold from me! Not if I have anything to say about it!"

"Lila?" asked Helga, stepping out of the stall. "What on earth are you doing?"

"Me? Oh, I'm…uh…just rehearsing for a play! Well, I, uh, guess I better get back to class!" Lila said, in her all too sweet voice.

"Yeah, right," muttered Helga, after Lila had left. "I've used the 'rehearsing for a play excuse' too many times to not be able to see through it. Something is seriously not right here. I mean, I always knew Lila was an annoying little phony, but I never knew she was, I don't know, out to get Arnold or something. I'll have to keep my guard up. I should really tell Arnold what she's up to, whatever it _is_ she's up to. But why would he listen to me? He's too into Li-la anyway. I can't believe that he likes her likes her. And the worst part is that I did that to myself."

She thought back to a couple months ago when she had been having one of her obsessive moments about Arnold…

* * *

"_With this chalk and no witnesses in sight, I will write the words upon this wall which bare my soul, expressing all I hope, I dream, I pine and I pray was true, forever and a day." Then picking up the chalk she wrote on a wall in the ally in which she was hiding,_ "_Arnold loves Helga," and sealed it with a heart. _

_Suddenly she heard laughter and the sound of people coming down the street._

"_Oh, criminy! Why on earth did I just write that?" _

_As she heard the people draw nearer, she unthinkingly erased her name and wrote in big letters_ "**LILA**_," before running and hiding behind some trash cans._

"_Hold up, girls," she heard Rhonda say. "Arnold loves Lila?"_

"_Gosh!"_

"_I wonder if it's true?" Nadine asked._

"_Of course it's true. It's written on the wall. 'Arnold loves Lila.'"_

"_Oh, but I'm sure there's some reasonable explanation," Lila protested._

"_Of course there is. The explanation is that Arnold loves you."_

"_Well, it couldn't possibly be true…could it?"_

"_Now why wouldn't it be true? Everybody likes you, Lila. You're smart and funny and, next to me, you're the best dresser in the whole class."_

"_Makes sense to me," Nadine stated._

"_He's probably just to shy to tell you himself, so he wrote it on the wall anonymously, hoping his secret wish would come true. It's so romantic." _

"_Gosh, I never really thought about Arnold that much. I mean, I always thought he liked me, but I never thought he_ liked_ me liked me."_

"_Well, he does, Lila, and I think it's just terribly sweet. He's really a very nice boy."_

_The next couple of days were complete nightmares. Lila, convinced that Arnold loved her, decided to spend every waking moment with him, much to Arnold's dismay. It wasn't until after Arnold had dumped Lila that he realized that_ he_ liked_ her_, only to be shunned once he told her this._

_Helga had been eavesdropping on their whole conversation, hidden on a tree branch. Lila calmly told Arnold that the only reason she had ever liked him liked him was because she thought he liked her liked her. But now that he told her that he really_ did_ like her like her, she only liked him but didn't _like _him like him. She walked away, leaving Arnold feeling alone and forgotten. Then the branch broke. _

_Helga fell out of the tree, right in front of him._

"_Helga?"_

"_Hey, football head, how's it going?" she said cheerfully, glad that Lila no longer liked him liked him._

"_What are _you _doing here?"_

"_Climbing trees!" she lied. "Boy, do I love climbing trees. Good healthy exercise."_

"_I guess so." He started to walk away. She ran to catch up with him._

"_So, I…couldn't help overhearing. I guess Lila dumped you pretty good, huh?" _

"_Yeah."_

"_Dumped you flat, hung you out to dry, doesn't like you like you, but still wants to be friends?"_

"_Uh-huh." He stopped and stared at the ground, too depressed to go on._

_She saw the hurt look in his eyes and couldn't stand it. She had to help. But how?_

"_You okay, Arnold?" she asked, putting her hand on his shoulder._

"_Yeah, I'm okay."_

"_Don't worry, you'll bounce back. I mean, there's plenty of other fish in the sea, right?"_

"_Yeah…" He turned around to look at her. "It's funny. When you like someone, and they don't really like you back, it's not so bad. But if you really_ _like them like them, but they just like you, it hurts. Have you ever felt that way about someone, Helga?"_

_She stopped in shock. She hadn't been expecting that._

_"W-who, me?" she said nervously. "No, no, of course not! Don't be ridiculous! But I…can understand how you must feel."_

_"Thanks. You going home?"_

_She shrugged. "Yeah, I guess so."_

_"Could I maybe walk with you?" he asked hopefully._

_"Well, sure, Arnold!" she said, a little too excitedly. She shook her head. "I-I mean, whatever floats your boat, football head."_

_

* * *

_

"If only I had left what I wrote on the wall!" she thought desperately, "instead of changing my name to my would-be arch nemesis. Then everything that happened to _her _would happen to _me_, except, of course, that I wouldn't dump him like that evil Little Miss Perfect did. If I only hadn't changed my name, then Arnold would love _me_ instead of that phony little nobody. It's all my fault," she sighed, as she leaned against the wall.

"Criminy, I must have spent like ten minutes in here!" Helga exclaimed, snapping back to reality. "I've got to get back to class!"


	8. The Project

Chapter 8

The Project

"Alright, class, you may get with your partners and start working on your project."

Helga was too busy daydreaming about Arnold to pay any attention to Mr. Simmons.

_"Oh, Arnold, everything is just so beautiful," Dream Helga said, looking at the field of flowers with a rushing brook running through it._

_"It is, but you are more beautiful than all of it put together."_

_"Oh, Arnold, you're just so wonderful."_

_"You really do love me, don't you?"_

_"Oh, yes, my love."_

"Helga?"

_"Yes, my love."_

"Helga?"

"Yes, my lo-, criminy, football head, what do you want?" Helga snapped, realizing that she was no longer in her dream.

"I was just asking you to move your desk."

"Fine, Arnoldo, I'll move my stupid desk. Sheesh!"

* * *

"Oh, Brainy, I'm sure I'm looking forward to working with you on this project ever so much!"

"Uhhh…"

"So, let's get started. Where do you want to live?"

"Uhh…somewhere."

"Some…where," Lila said, writing it down; paying too much attention to Arnold and Helga to notice or even care what she was writing down. "Okay, what do you want your job to be?"

"Uhh…something."

"Great. Okay, what about food?"

"Uhhh…"

"Wonderful. Should we have any children?"

"Uhh…I don't know."

"I…don't…know. Okay, we're done."

* * *

"Okay, Helga, where should we live?"

"How am I supposed to know? And why do you get to ask the questions?"

"Well, I thought maybe we could both give answers to the questions and then combine them into an answer that we both agree on."

"Arnold, you are _such_ an idiot. We'll never agree on anything."

"Helga, just give it a chance."

"Okay, fine. Where do I want to live? Hmm…I want to travel around the world! I want to visit Paris, Rome, the whole nine yards! Or…something like that."

"You know, that might actually work. My parents spent their whole lives traveling to jungles and things, and I've always thought it'd be a neat way to live."

"Great, write it down."

* * *

"Okay, Curly, let's just get this over with as fast as possible," Rhonda said, glaring at Curly. "And no funny business."

"Of course not, my sweet petunia!"

"Somebody save me. Okay, where are we living?"

"Wherever suits you best, my love."

"Oh, brother," she said, writing down "Luxurious Mansion". "Job?"

"Zoo keeper! FREE THE ANIMALS!"

"Uh…yeah," she said, writing down "investment banker". "Food?"

"Leaves, twigs, bark…"

"Caviar, tea, crumpets. Children? Never mind, don't even go there," she exclaimed, writing down a solid "**NO!**"

* * *

"Alright, what's next? Job. Hmm…I think I'll run for president."

"Helga, you can't be president if you're traveling the world."

"Got any better ideas, football head?"

"Well, I really enjoy helping people…maybe I'll be a psychologist."

"A psychologist? Do they even make any money?"

"If they work hard enough."

"Alright, you can be a shrink, and I'll…um…I'll write a bunch of poetry books, just incase the whole psycho thing doesn't work out."

"You write poetry?"

"Uh…yeah. Sometimes. Just a little hobby that I have."

"Wow, I didn't know that. You never really struck me as the poetic type."

"Well, you learn something new everyday, Arnoldo."

* * *

"Alright, Phoebe, where would ya like to live?"

"Oh, anywhere is fine really."

"Okay, we'll just stay in the city in an apartment."

"That's fine. What about a job? Hmm…I think I'll be a brain surgeon, or a nuclear physicist, or a chemical engineer."

"Um…great. I'll help. What about food?"

"Oh, I think it would be nice to just have a simple diet. You know, with all organic fruits and vegetables and whole grain wheat and-"

"Could we throw a couple hamburgers and candy bars in there?"

"Certainly, Gerald. Now, what about…children?"

"Um…"

"I think three is a good number. Don't you?"

"Three? Yeah, that'll work."

"And we'll send them all to Harvard, Princeton, or Yale."

"I'm sure they'll be able to get in when they have someone as smart as you as their mother."

"Oh, Gerald," she said, stifling a giggle.

* * *

"Alright, Helga, what about food?"

"No strawberries, no cranberries, no corn, no pig's feet, and especially _no_ pork rinds."

"What's wrong with those things?"

"Corn is disgusting, pig's feet are disgusting, I'm deathly allergic to strawberries, and…um…pork rinds are just…weird," she said, thinking of the time that eating pork rinds caused her to sleepwalk to Arnold's house every night, almost revealing her secret.

"Okay, we have what we _can't_ eat, so what _can_ we eat?"

"Um…candy and junk food and stuff. And champagne and little chocolates in little heart shaped boxes."

"That's not much of a diet."

"Well, I'm not cooking, that's for sure."

"I can sort of cook, but my grandma taught me, and she likes to boil straw and bees and watermelon and stuff."

"Why don't we just order takeout?"

"Works for me."

* * *

"Alright, Patty, here's what we're gonna do. We'll live in a box behind Wal-Mart, you can sell hotdogs, we'll eat a lot, we'll have eight children, and then we'll send them all to an orphanage."

"Don't you think that's a little harsh?"

"How much room do you expect in a cardboard box?"

"Why do we have to live in a cardboard box?"

"Cause I said so!"

"You and what army?" Patty said, clenching her fist.

"Alright, alright, we'll live in a wooden carton instead."

"Oh, brother."

* * *

"Okay, we're almost done. We just have one more question."

"We are?" Helga said, with just a hint of disappointment in her voice.

"Criminy, I don't want this to be over already!" she thought to herself.

"Okay…children. What do you think?"

"Well…I don't know. I've never really thought about it," she said.

"Wow," she thought. "I suppose it could be fun, but why would I want to share my love for Arnold with some child?"

"Actually, Arnold, probably not," she said out loud.

"Why not?"

"I don't know. I just…uh…probably wouldn't make a very good parent."

"Why not?"

"Why would you care?"

"Okay, okay, sorry I asked."

"Well, if you really _must _know, it's because my family isn't exactly the Brady Bunch."

"Huh?"

"My family stinks."

"Come on, Helga, it can't be that bad."

"Yes, it can! You don't know what it's like living in a world where everyone hates you. You get to live in your boardinghouse with your wonderful grandparents and your lovable, eccentric boarders and stuff. I have to live with Miriam, my lazy, useless, drunken excuse for a mother, and Big Bob, the overworked, harsh, brute who can't even remember my name! All he'll ever talk about is Ol-ga, my all too perfect sister. He's got the whole living room completely decorated with all the trophies and ribbons and awards and other pointless junk that she's ever won. He can't seem to register the fact that SHE'S BEEN AT COLLEGE THREE YEARS! SHE DOESN'T LIVE THERE ANYMORE! And yet he insists on calling me Olga. Can't he even get that THAT'S NOT MY NAME?"

"At least you _have_ parents!"

Helga suddenly stopped and thought about that. She hadn't stopped to consider how Arnold must have felt with his parents disappearing when he was only one.

"Sorry, Arnold. I guess you're right. We both have it pretty bad."

"I just wish I knew where they where…" he said, his mind wandering to his parents who had been sent to San Lorenzo on a trip, never to return. "Maybe one."

"One what?"

"One kid. I'd kind of like one, just to experience it."

"I don't know…"

"Please?" he pleaded, looking into her eyes.

"Criminy, football head!" she cried, breaking the stare. "You act like we're really getting married or something!"

"Helga, we're only nine."

"Exactly! None of these answers mean anything! It's just a stupid project! And anyway, you're just about the last person I'd want to marry! I can't believe we're even partners! This is just like that stupid egg project!"

"Fine then! Just write down something, and we'll be done with it!"

"Fine!" she shouted, writing down "One." Then she looked at it, frowned, and wrote "Maybe." next to it.


	9. Egg Story

Chapter 9

Egg Story

"Okay,class! Time to turn in your projects"

Everyone stood up and turned in their work.

"Oh, Arnold!" Helga whispered quietly to herself. "Why must I always be so cruel? _Again _I have the perfect chance to be nice to you, to show you that I'm not just a mean bully out to get you, and _again _I blow it! What on earth is wrong with me? Why can't I just reveal my tender side instead of being so nasty all the time? If I had only been a little nicer, this could have ended up like that egg project almost was!" She thought back to the last project they did.

* * *

_She and Arnold were partners, and they were _supposed _to care for an egg whose symbolic meaning was a baby. She had told herself then that she was going to be nice, and she was going to be true to her word, when Arnold decided that he had to 'lay down the line'. Before she knew what was happening, he was practically screaming at her, and she had no choice but to lash back. _

_Because they were arguing so much, they both lost the egg and had to go on a crazy search all over the city to attempt to find it. She finally blamed Arnold for losing the egg, and he said that all she had done was argue, so it was her fault. That was when she kind of lost it._

_"Oh, don't put this on me, football head. When we started out on the bus all I was trying to do was be nice and get along with you!"_

_"That's not true."_

_"Yes, it is! But you didn't even give me a chance! You jumped all over me. You said, 'I'd rather work with anybody else on the planet but you', and ever since all we've done is argue! You started it Arnold, not me." At this she crossed her arms and turned away, preparing herself for whatever excuse he would throw at her next._

_"Well, can you blame me? I mean, most of the time you're just…mean. Anyway, arguing hasn't gotten us anywhere, and…to tell you the truth, I'm just sick of it. I'm willing to apologize if you are. Truce?"_

_She stopped, stunned by his words. He was sorry? And he wanted her to be sorry too? What did this mean? Did he want to be…friends or something? Maybe even more than friends? Okay, maybe that was going too far. But there always was the slight chance._

_"Okay, on the one hand, I can just say no and tell him that I would never be sorry and stuff…the usual," she thought to herself. "On the other hand, I can risk everything, say I'm sorry, and just…see what happens. Awe, what the heck?"_

_She turned around. "O-okay, I'm sorry too," she sighed, as she sat down next to him on the bench in the park where he sat, her head almost resting on his shoulder. _

_They sat that way for a moment, neither one of them saying anything; both of them at perfect contentment. It was like they both realized that even though the other one could sometimes be mean, neither one of them really meant it. In the long run, they were both just trying to make their way in the world without other people giving them a hard time. In a word, it was perfect. Helga wouldn't have traded that moment for anything in the world. She loved to imagine what _could _have happened, if they hadn't been so rudely interrupted…_

"_Wait a minute, do you hear something?"_

"_No," Helga thought, too wrapped up in the moment to notice anything else. But sure enough, if she listened hard enough, she could hear a small cracking sound coming from under their bench. They both got off and stuck their heads under the bench._

"_Our egg!" Helga gasped._

"_Helga, it's…it's hatching." _

_They both watched in amazement as a little chick slowly pecked itself out of the egg. They both looked at each other as if to say, "Well…that was weird."_

_Because of the lack of room, after all, they were under a bench, they were very close to each other. They were so close that Helga could actually feel Arnold's breath on her face. She was almost dying of excitement, but it all ended too soon._

"_Come on, we better take it someplace warm," Arnold said, scooping the chick up in his hand and standing up._

"_Drat," Helga whispered before she stood up too._

_

* * *

_

The loud ringing of the bell brought her back to her senses.

"Okay, class! You're dismissed! Have a 'special' rest of the afternoon!"

"I wonder what we talked about for the last hour," Helga thought, as she walked out of the school. "Oh, well."


	10. What championship?

Chapter 10

What championship?

"Wolfgang, we can't play _now_!"

"Yeah, it's pouring rain!"

"We'll all drown!"

"What the heck?" Helga thought, as she made her way towards the crowd of people on the sidewalk.

"Hey, Pheebs, what's going on?"

"It seems that Wolfgang still wants to conduct the baseball championship today despite the weather."

"Oh, criminy! The championship! I forgot all about it!"

"You wussy fourth graders aren't gonna chicken out because of a little rain, are you?" the huge fifth grade bully taunted.

"Well, actually-" Sid began.

"We'll play," Arnold cut in. "And we'll win too."

"Oh, sure, that'll be the day."

"What? _You're_ not gonna chicken out now, are you?"

"Course not."

"Then we'll play you. Right now. Over at Gerald Field."

"Fine! Fifth graders against fourth graders. This'll be a piece of cake."

"Arnold, what did you do that for?!" Harold cried, once Wolfgang had walked away.

"They're fifth graders!"

"They'll eat us alive!"

"There's no way we could possibly beat them!"

"Criminy, football head, what are you trying to do, kill us?"  
"Come on, you guys! We've played Wolfgang lots of times!"

"Yeah, and we lost most of them."

"That's not true! We've won…some."

"Yeah, but not before some of us were beaten up," Helga said, remembering all too well the time that she and Arnold both got black eyes for refusing to play football against them.

"Well…maybe we'll be lucky this time." All the fourth graders stared at him with a disbelieving look. "Come on, guys, we can do it! It's now or never! Who's with me?"

"Actually, I've got a doctor's appointment."

"Yeah, right, Sid."

"O-okay, fine. I'll go."

"Great. What about the rest of you guys?"

"Whatever."

"Sure."

"I guess."

"There's nothing better to do."

"Great! Then let's go!"


	11. The Ball Game

Chapter 11

The Ball Game

"Well, well, well, what have we got here? Looks like you fourth grade wussys actually kept your word."

"Wolfgang, just shut up and play."

"Nobody tells me to shut up, got it, football face?"

"Okay, okay, sure. Let's just get this game going."

"Whatever."

"Okay, listen up!" Helga called, taking charge of the team, as always when it came to sports. "Sid, you cover first, Sheena you cover second, Tall Hair Boy on third, Curly, Harold, Lila, and Nadine go outfield, Stinky, Football Head, Brainy, and Rhonda cover infield."

"Are you insane?!" Rhonda exclaimed. "I'm not going out there! Do you see all that mud? The field looks like a swamp! I'll completely ruin my exclusive, one of a kind, vintage outfit! Do you realize that it cost three hundred and fifty dollars?!"

"Whoopdeedo. Don't blame me. Arnold's the one who got us into this mess in the first place."

"Arnold, remind me to kill you."  
"Um…I'll do that."

"Are you guys playing or not?" Wolfgang shouted.

"Phoebe, you're score keeper. Okay, break."

"Hey, Helga, what are you doing?"

"What do you think, Arnoldo, I'm catcher! Doi!"

"Hey, what about our team?" Wolfgang shouted. "We don't have any extra people to be catcher!"

"Fine, then I'll be catcher for _both_ teams," Helga replied. "Happy?"

"How do I know you won't cheat?"

"Look, if you just want to forfeit now and declare us the winner, you can go right ahead."

"Oh, whatever," Wolfgang reluctantly agreed.

"Okay, we're up first. Stinky, get over here!"

"Okeydokey."

Some fifth grader pitched the ball, and it went right over Stinky's head before he even saw it.

"Strike one!" Another pitch. Another miss. "Strike two! This is so pathetic. Strike three! You're out!"

"How can I be out? He never even pitched the dang ball!"

"Stinky, he pitched it three times," Helga said.

"Awe. This really bites."

After that, the fifth graders struck out Harold. Next it was Lila's turn up to bat.

"I'm just ever so sure that baseball is my all time favorite sport!"

"Oh, really? Well maybe you should 'ever so' keep your eye on the ball if you don't want to strike out," Helga taunted, as she tossed the ball back to the pitcher. "Strike one!"

"What? But that's not possible! I'm ever so sure that I'm supposed to be ever so perfect at just about everything I do."

"Fascinating. Strike two!" Helga cried, enjoying every minute of Lila's humiliation.

"That's it. This has gone far enough!"

"Strike three! You're out! So go, Little Miss Perfect!"

"That's the last straw! Hey, you!"

"Who, me?"

"That's right!" Lila shouted, marching across the field to where Wolfgang stood, on the pitchers mound. "What do you think you're doing?! Don't you realize what you've done?!"

"Uh…struck you out?"

"Exactly! You struck _me_ out!"

"Uh…so?"

"So?! So, you can't do that to me! I'm perfect! And now, you're gonna pay."

"Whatever," he muttered, shoving her face down in the mud.

"Hey, Arnold! You see what just happened to Lila?" Gerald said.

"Huh? No, what?"

"Oh, brother. You're _so_ in love with the girl that you don't even notice when she gets thrown in the mud?"

"She did? Why didn't you tell me, Gerald?"

"I just did."

"Oh, yeah. Well, it looks like she's okay," he said, watching her stand up and run away.

"Are you feeling okay, man? The love of your life just got completely nailed, and you don't even care! I thought you'd jump up and run to help her, but you didn't even notice!"

"Well…what could I do against Wolfgang? Besides, she's okay. I just…had my mind on the game is all."

"Whatever you say, Arnold. Whatever you say."

"Yo, Arnold! Get over here! We need another player!" Helga shouted across the field to him.

"Coming!" he called back to her.

"Listen, Arnold, you need to make this hit! We're down by four points!" Helga whispered from behind him.

"I'll do the best I can, but he seems to be pretty unbeatable."

"Come on, Arnold! You can do it! You're always saying junk like that, so why not put it to some good use?"

"I'll try."

"Well, well, well, if it isn't the football face up to bat. I've knocked out three of your little classmates, and I guess you'll be my next victim."

"Just throw the ball Wolfgang," he said through clenched teeth.

Wolfgang fired the pitch, and it flew past Arnold.

"Strike, ow!" Helga cried, as she caught the ball. "Criminy, that guy throws hard!"

"Are you okay?" Arnold asked, with a hint of concern in his voice, as he turned to her.

"I'm fine. Strike two! Arnold, forget me, keep your eye on the ball!"

"Oh, right. Sorry."

"Arnold! Swing!" she cried.

He turned around and saw the ball heading right at him. He swung with all his might, and his bat collided with the ball.

"RUN!"

He tour around first, second, third base.

"Where's the ball?" Wolfgang shouted.

"I don't know! It landed in the mud somewhere!"

"Well, find it!"

"Home run!" Helga shouted. All the fourth graders cheered. "Keep going, Arnold!" she whispered to herself

First base.

"I found it Wolfgang!"

"Well, what are you waiting for, get it!"

Second base.

The fifth grader threw it to another player.

Third base.

"Arnold! Go Arnold!" all the fourth graders shouted.

"HOME RUN!" Helga cried.

"Wolfgang! Catch!" the fifth grader called, throwing the mud covered ball to him.

"About time, you pathetic losers!"

Arnold stopped on home plate, gasping for breath.

"Arnold, you did it!" Helga cried. "That was…amazing!"

"Thanks," he panted.

"The new score is fifth graders four, fourth graders two."


	12. The Rescue

Chapter 12

The Rescue

"Okay, someone take a turn at bat," Helga called.

"Helga, I think everyone's already gone."

"What are you talking about? There's still plenty of people!"

"Most of them got scared when Lila got knocked down and ran away."

"Boy, she seems to have a knack for wrecking stuff. There's got to be someone left!"

"Doesn't look like it."

"Hey, football face! Bring someone up to bat!" Wolfgang shouted.

"There's no one left, Wolfgang."

"Well, then…use her! In the pink dress!"

"What?! I'm not batting! I'm the catcher!" Helga exclaimed.

"Fine then! You wanna end the game right now and just say that we beat you losers?"

"No…"

"Then bat!"

"You can go, Helga," Arnold said. "I'll be catcher."

"_I'm _catcher!"

"It'll just be for one round."

"But…I don't know how to bat."

"What do you mean 'you don't know how to bat'?"

"I'm just not good at it. I've grown so used to being catcher that I forgot how."

"That's not true. I've seen you bat once. You hit it too!"

"That was a fluke. I didn't even swing! The ball just kind of hit the bat."

"Come on, Helga, you can do it!"

"Copier. I just told you to hit the ball, and now you're telling me."

"It worked, didn't it?" he said, staring into her eyes.

"Well…okay. I'll do it. Gimme your bat."

"Good luck," he said, as she stepped up to the plate.

"Oh, brother. This'll be a cinch. All I have to do is strike out a stupid little girl in a pink dress and bow! What are you doing here anyway? Shouldn't you be at home playing with your dolls?"

"Throw the stupid ball," she muttered, clenching the bat.

"You can do it, Helga," Arnold said from behind her. "Just concentrate."

"If Arnold thinks I can do it, then I can probably do it," Helga thought to herself.

"Here you go, girl!" Wolfgang exclaimed, as he shot the ball right at her head.

"Oh, man, this isn't good," she thought. Then, without realizing what she was doing, she swung the bat with all her might and sent the ball back, sailing towards Wolfgang.

It gave a sickening CRACK as it smashed into Wolfgang's head. He fell back with a groan. Everyone was still.

"Wow," Sid gasped, breaking the silence.

"That was…weird," Nadine said.

"I think I'm gonna be sick," Sheena moaned, since she hated violence of any kind.

"Helga's gonna get it _so _bad," Rhonda spoke up.

"He'll pound her!" Harold exclaimed.

"Wow. Did I just do that?" Helga gasped, staring down at the bat, surprised at her own strength.

"Maybe you have dangerous lumber."

"Huh?" Helga said, turning around.

"Dangerous lumber," Arnold repeated. "You know, when you hit a person every time you hit a ball. I had it for awhile, but I think I'm over it by now."

"Oh, sure, and that's why you gave me amnesia by knocking me on the head with a baseball a few weeks ago."

"Oh, yeah. Sorry. I forgot about that."

"Maybe I gave Wolfgang amnesia too, and he won't kill me."

"I'm sure he won't kill you. It was an accident. He can't hurt you for that."

"Arnold, this is Wolfgang we're talking about! He'll hurt people for doing nothing! He'll pulverize me! He'll tear me limb from limb! I'm gonna be dead!"

"Maybe you could just, you know, talk to him."

"Arnold, that is the worst idea I've ever heard. You always say that, and it never works! People never want to talk! It's a _lot_ easier to just punch someone's face in. Believe me, I've done it."

"Well, maybe-"

"No, Arnold, it won't work. Face it; I'm as good as gone. Well, anyway…thanks for…um…you know…"

"What?"

"For…just being there when no one else was. You seem to have a knack for that."

"You're welcome…I think."

"Uh…what happened?" Wolfgang groaned.

"You got beaned, big time."

"By who?"

"That girl with the bow."

"WHAT?" he roared, jumping to his feet.

"What a speedy recovery," Stinky said.

"That true?" Wolfgang said, walking over to home plate.

Helga just stared at him, too scared to move.

"Hey, I asked you a question!"

"Um…sorry?"

"Sorry's not good enough, princess."

"I-it's not my fault! I'm not a very good batter. And besides, you're the one who told me to bat in the first place!"

"Watch your mouth, girl. It doesn't matter who's fault it is, the fact is that you beaned me, and you're gonna pay."

"Okay, great. I owe you ten bucks. You know what? Make it twenty."

"I don't think you get what kind of pay I mean," he said, slamming his fist into his hand.

"Thirty?"

"Not good enough," he said, as he picked her up by the collar of her shirt and slammed her into a brick wall.

"Please stop," she whispered, almost to herself, tears forming in her eyes.

Wolfgang, not at all touched by her words, drew his fist back and prepared to punch Helga all the way to next year. She closed her eyes and waited for the pain.

"Fight, fight, fight, fight!" all the kids chanted.

Arnold stood a couple feet behind them, stunned. He couldn't believe Wolfgang was gonna do something like that to a girl! It had been an accident after all. And she said that she was sorry.

Suddenly, Arnold felt really mad. Madder than he had ever felt in his whole life. Without realizing what he was doing, or why, he ran up to Wolfgang, grabbed him by the arm, and spun him around.

"**LEAVE HER ALONE!**" he shouted in his face.

"Oooh," all the kids said, wondering why on earth Arnold was trying to protect Helga.

"Oh, are you sticking up for your little girlfriend?" Wolfgang taunted, still poised to strike Helga.

Helga peered around Wolfgang to see how Arnold would react to these words. Arnold met her stare and saw in her eyes a fear he had never known, but also a glimpse of…hope?

"**I SAID LEAVE HER ALONE!**"

"Why should I?" Wolfgang asked, throwing Helga to the ground.

She laid there motionless in the rain, her head throbbing with pain but still watching the fight.

"I'll give you five good reasons why," Arnold yelled, and, balling each of his fingers into a fist, calmly said, "One, two, three, four, five. Get the picture?"

"Oh, I'm so scared! I'm gonna get beaten up by a fourth grader! Oh, help, someone help!" Wolfgang said sarcastically.

"How could you do that to a girl?"

"Who cares? She's just a stupid girl."

"No one talks that way about Helga and gets away with it," he said through clenched teeth, as he slammed his fist right at Wolfgang's nose. It made contact with its target and then did again. Blood gushed from Wolfgang's nose as he fell backwards into the mud.


	13. Can I walk you home?

Chapter 13

Can I walk you home?

"Wow," someone said with disbelief.

"Go, Arnold!" all the fourth graders cheered, once getting over the initial shock.

"Oh, my gosh," Helga thought to herself over and over again. "Arnold saved me. Oh, my gosh."

"Helga, are you okay?" Arnold asked, kneeling beside her, totally oblivious to the cheering, or the fact that he had just knocked out the biggest kid in school. For now his thoughts were only of her. "Are you okay?" he asked again.

She stared up at him and smiled weakly. "I'm okay."

"Wow, Arnold! That was amazing!"

All the fourth graders crowded around them.

"That was so cool!"

"It was unbelievable!"

"How'd you do it?"

"_Why'd _you do it?"

Arnold starred up at Gerald, who had said this last comment.

"Why should you care why I did it?"

"Maybe Wolfgang was right. Maybe Arnold _likes_ her likes her," Sid said.

"Arnold and Helga sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Harold immediately started singing.

"Don't be ridiculous," Gerald said. "No friend of _mine_ would ever like like her. Right, Arnold?"

Everyone fell silent, listening intently to what Arnold had to say, especially Helga.

"You know what, Gerald? I don't like her like her, but even if I did, you shouldn't be asking me to choose between the two of you, and you shouldn't interfere. Because if I had to choose, it wouldn't be you."

"Oooh."

"Dis."

"You know what your problem is, Arnold? You're too caught up in your glorious moment to realize what's important to you. Come on, everybody. Let's leave him alone so he can get back to reality."

Everyone slowly walked off, talking excitedly amongst themselves.

"What jerks," Arnold said quietly.

"Thanks."

"Oh, it was nothing," Arnold said, turning to face Helga.

"It was something though. That guy could've killed me. You risked your life to save me."

"I didn't really 'risk my life'." The most he could have done was…well, maybe you're right."

"But why'd you do it? I mean, I didn't do anything to deserve it. And he didn't do anything to make you mad."

"I just…didn't want to see you get hurt. I mean, I know that we haven't really ever gotten along before, but you never really did anything _that_ bad. Besides, it was an accident, and you apologized. He had nothing to hold against you. Plus, you're a girl."

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"Guys just shouldn't do stuff like that to girls. It's not polite."

"Obviously no one ever taught him any manners," she said, struggling to sit up.

"Here, let me help you," he said quickly, putting his arm around her shoulders.

"You don't need to help me, I'm fine. Well…at least, I would have been a lot worse," she said, glancing over at Wolfgang, who was still out cold on the ground. "You think you'll get in trouble for doing that to him?"

"No one has to know."

"It'll get out. No one is good at keeping secrets, Arnold."

"Well, if I do, I don't care. I did what I had to do, and that's all that matters."

"But that's just it! You _didn't_ have to do anything! Frankly, I thought you'd enjoy seeing me get beaten to a pulp. And what about Lila? She got it bad too, and you didn't even notice. I thought you liked her liked her."

"How'd you know?"

"Like I said, no one is good at keeping secrets."

"Oh. Well…I don't know why I didn't care. You were just…different."

"Different?" she asked.

"I wish he'd start making sense. The suspense is killing me!" she thought to herself.

"Yeah, just different. Hey, Helga, could I maybe walk you home? I mean, you're still pretty hurt, and you might need help."

"W-walk me home?" she exclaimed, fainting inside.

"I can't seem so excited!" she thought to herself.

"I-I mean, I'm sure I can make it by myself," she said, standing up. She immediately was overcome by dizziness and fell forward, right into Arnold's outstretched arms. "Actually, football head, maybe I'll take you up on your offer," she said, staring into his eyes. "If it's not too much trouble."

"Not at all."

"Kiss me, you idiot!" she thought desperately, "Just kiss me! You're only, like, an inch from me! Kiss me!"

"Come on. Let's go."

"Arnold. I love you, but you can be really dense," she sighed to herself.

"Can you walk?"

"Um…a little," she said, taking a few steps and almost falling again.

"Lean on me," he said, putting his arm around her waist and lifting her left arm and putting it around his shoulder. "Now just go slow, and we'll make it," he said, as they started to walk out of the field and down the street.

"Pinch me, I'm dreaming," she thought to herself. "This is too good to be true. Arnold is actually worried about me! And he actually risked his wonderful existence for me! And, good grief, does his hair smell good. I wonder what shampoo he uses?"

* * *

"Okay, Helga, here we are," Arnold said, when they had walked to her house.

"It was over to soon," she sadly thought to herself.

"Well…thanks, football head. You really saved the day. I…I don't know how I could thank you enough."

"It really wasn't anything," he said, smiling at her.

She was about to go inside, when she stopped. "And, Arnold?"

"Yeah?"

"Um…if anyone asks…none of this ever happened."

"Well, everyone saw the fight-"

No, not that…"

"What? That I walked you home?"

She nodded.

"I only did that to make sure you were okay."

"Oh, I know…but they don't. I just don't want anyone getting the wrong idea. I mean…I still have a reputation."

He laughed. "Alright, Helga, if it means that much to you, I won't tell anyone."

"Good."

"Well…I guess I better get going then."

"Yeah."

"I'll see you tomorrow," he said, smiling at her.

"Yeah. See ya," she said, smiling a little, before hurrying inside and closing to door.

"Only Helga," he thought, as he walked down the street towards his house.


	14. The Plan

Chapter 14

The Plan

"Helga? Where've you been, honey?"

"Out, Miriam," Helga said, stepping into the kitchen.

"Oh, okay, that sounds fun."

"OLGA! Get over here!"

"Coming, DAD!" she shouted back at her father.

"Olga, I need you to fix this blasted TV! I need to watch my new beeper commercial!"

"It's _Helga_,Dad! H-E-L-G-A!"

"I know how to spell, Olga. Now hurry up, and fix the television!"

"How am I supposed to know how to fix the television? I'm not a mechanic!"

"Your sister could have done it. She won an award for best technician of the year. And she was only six years old!"

"Fine! I'll see what I can do," she said, crawling behind the TV. "Bob, you didn't even plug it in."

"Oh, really? Well, that explains a lot. Now get out of my way, my commercial's on!"

_"Hi, I'm Big Bob, the Beeper King. Here at 'Big Bob's Beepers', I'll do everything I can to make sure that you get a quality beeper, at a price you can afford. No refunds!"_

_"Big Bob's Beepers!"_

_"Warning, restrictions may apply."_

"Oh, brother," Helga muttered. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go join a motorcycle gang and rob a bank."

"Yeah, whatever, just keep it down."

"I'll do that, Bob," she said, as she climbed the stairs to her room. Once she was there, she quickly shut and locked her door and ran to her closet.

"Oh, Arnold!" she exclaimed, talking to her shrine. "What a glorious day it has been! Okay, so maybe I got smashed into a wall, and now I'll probably have a headache till kingdom come, but still! Oh, my sweet angel! How kind you are to me! But why? I certainly haven't done anything to deserve it. After all, I've been anything but nice to you, and yet you risk getting your wonderful face bashed in for me! And nothing did you do for Li-la. And then you walked me home and, oh, Arnold! If only everyday could be like this one! Then I could show you what I'm truly like inside, and maybe, just maybe, you would start to feel the same way about me." She sighed happily but then stopped.

"But how could you?" she wondered. "How could you love me when you don't even know how I feel? I mean, I know that guys are supposed to make the first move, but I don't think we're gonna get anywhere with that rule. You're the type of guy who needs someone's help before you can realize your own feelings, much less someone else's. Alright, fine, you're dense. But that's all the more reason that I should tell you! If I ever want to have any chance at all of being loved by you, or maybe I'm just tired of waiting, then I have to take drastic measures. I must be insane. Oh, well. Now, what's a way that I can confess, without actually doing the confessing?" She thought for awhile.

"Oh! I know! I'll just send him a love letter. It's that simple! I'm surprised I never thought of it before. But the letter better be good if I want to get my point across. I bet I'm gonna regret this, but I dare. I dare!"

With that she picked up a purple pen and pad of paper and began to write.


	15. PS I love you

Chapter 15

P.S. I love you.

_Dearest Arnold, _

_ You have no idea how long I've waited to write these blessed words. I have waited for six, long, painstaking years, but at last, Arnold, at last! I am ready to give unto you the most hallowed of secrets. Arnold, my darling, my sweet flaxen haired angel, I LOVE YOU!!_

_Yes, Arnold, yes! I love you! I've loved you ever since I first laid eyes on your wonderful, sweet football head! But until now I've been too scared to come out with it, too shy to tell you that I absolutely adore you!_

_I know you don't know who I am (at least, I hope so), but here's one major clue…__**I'M NOT LILA! SHE DOESN'T LIKE YOU LIKE YOU! GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL! I'M THE ONLY ONE FOR YOU!**_

_Love, love, love times one million,_

_(Ha! You didn't think I'd actually tell you, did you?)_

_P.S. You're so dense! I can't believe you haven't figured out who I am yet! Hurry up!_

_P.P.S. The little pink book was mine, the locket was mine, the parrot was mine, all the poems Mr. Simmons ever read were about you, by me, and the heart on the wall that said 'Arnold loves __**LILA**__' was written by me._

_P.P.P.S. No! I'm not Lila! I just changed the name so you (and other people) wouldn't find out._

_P.P.P.P.S. I love __U__!!_

_P.P.P.P.P.S. __**XXXXXXXXX**_

_**P.P.P.P.P.P.S. **__**OOOOOOOOO**_

Then she got a new piece of paper and wrote:

_P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. Thanks for saving me today._

"There," she said, reading it over. "It's perfect."

She quickly sealed it in an envelope, wrote Arnold's name, address and 'From Anonymous' on it, ran to the corner mailbox, and dropped the letter in.

"No going back now. It's done."


	16. Gertie

Chapter 16

Gertie

"Hey, short man! Where've ya been all day?"

"School. And a baseball game."

"That's an awful long ball game, Arnold. It's almost seven thirty!"

"Well…"

"Oh, I can sense another one of your boyhood problems coming on. Let me guess, you were playing against that big Wolfgang fellow who's always giving ya trouble."

"Yeah."

"Everything was going good until he pushed down a girl you like."

"Yeah."

"But somehow you didn't care!"

"Yeah!"

"And then this guy's about to beat up another girl."

"Yeah!"

"And this one you don't really like cause this one's always bugging ya."

"Yeah."

"It was your little friend with the pink bow and the one eyebrow, wasn't it?"

"Yeah. Helga."

"But before you know what you're doing, you're there beating up the guy, and you don't know why!"

"Yeah! How'd you know, Grandpa?"

"Cause the same thing happened to me when I was your age!"

"It did? What happened?"

"You know that girl I told you about?"

"What girl?"

"Gertie!"

"Gertie?"

"You know! The girl that was always picking on me and calling me names, just like that Helga does!"

"Oh, yeah. Her. So?"

"So, the same thing happened to me and her! Except that we were playing marbles, and I had to beat up a third grader."

"A _third _grader?"

"Big, powerful third grader!"

"Sure. Was Gertie the one you liked?"

"Gertie? Well, of course not! I would have nothing to do with her! I liked a girl by the name of Hedy Lamarr."

"But you didn't care that she got beat up?"

"That's right!"

"And you felt really mad when Gertie was gonna get beat up?"

"Bingo!"

"But why?"

"I'll tell you Arnold…I have _no _idea!"

"That doesn't really help."

"I never said it would."

"So, what did you do?"

"How should I know? That was seventy something years ago! You're lucky I remembered that much! I must have done something right though, since I ended up marrying her."

"You WHAT?!"

"I never told you that?"

"Um…no."

"Really? That was the point of my story last time!"

"What was?"

"That you and that Helga girl are perfect for each other!"

"Me and _HELGA_?!"

"Helga and I."

"Whatever."

"I tell ya, Arnold, that girl likes you!"

"Are you crazy? She hates me!"

"I'm telling ya, Arnold, she likes ya! Trust me!"

"How would you know?"

"Cause I'm old, and I've lived through many valuable life experiences, and I know this stuff. And I told you before, sometimes I see her skipping rope in front of our house, like she's waiting for you to come out or something."

"Grandpa, I don't think you get it. We're talking about _Helga_. I've known her since preschool, and believe me, she is _not _the type of person who would have a crush on anyone, much less me."

"You know what, Arnold? I'm gonna remind you of this conversation on your wedding day, and then you'll see how ridiculous you sound."

"What, now you think I should _marry_ Helga?"

"Sure! Why not?"

"The last time I checked, you were supposed to love someone before you married them. And Helga hates me!"

"That's exactly what I thought of Gertie before she confessed."

"Confessed?"

"Oh, boy, Arnold, you poor lad. You've got the whole experience ahead of you."

"What experience?"

"The confession."

"The confession? What's that?"

"Ah, the confession. It's a nightmare and a wonderful dream shoved together. It's both beautiful and terrifying at the same time. And it's really confusing. Does that help?"

"Uh…no, not really. Do you think you could just tell me what Gertie did? Did it hurt? It sounds dangerous."

"_Dangerous_?! Well, actually, I guess it could be. Gertie almost strangled me."

"So…now you're saying that Helga's gonna try to murder me?"

"Yes. I mean, no! Just listen, Arnold, cause I feel a flashback coming on. Okay, you know how I told you that I never finished the fourth grade?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I never finished it because the great depression rolled around, and everyone went broke. I couldn't afford to stay in school. In fact, I had to get a job, just to help my family survive."

"What did you do?"

"I worked in a factory for awhile, and then I worked at Joe's Fish Mart."

"Okay. What does that have to do with anything?"

"Nothing, but you asked, so I told you. Anyway, I got some more jobs around the city, but no one really kept me on, since I was only nine. Then the family farm blew out, so we decided that we had no choice but to move to Nebraska and start a new life."

"Nebraska?"

"Sure, why not? Quit interrupting. Anyway, it was the day before we were gonna move, so I was going around saying goodbye to all my friends. It was a really sad day. I didn't want to move, but I figured I had no future here, so I might as well."

"But weren't you going to miss your friends?"

"Well, sure, but they're just friends. Let me tell you something, Arnold. Friends come and go. You lose some, but then you make some new ones. Then you lose those. Friends aren't worth worrying too much about. That is, not unless you meet someone _really _special."

"Like Jimmy Kafka?"

"_Jimmy Kafka_?! My good-for-nothing, backstabbing best friend? Of course not! I hate him! We have nothing to do with each other!"

"He came back and visited that one time, didn't he?"

"That was just a fluke. Besides, we argued the whole time, and then he left, and I've never heard from him since. Maybe he died."

"Grandpa…"

"Okay, fine. The point is, NO! Jimmy Kafka wasn't worth anything!"

"But you said-"

"I _know _what I said, Arnold. I said that friends aren't worth worrying about unless you find someone really special. _Really _special. You get what I'm saying?"

"No, not really."

"Boy, Arnold, you're dense. Then again, so was I, so I guess I can't hold much against you. Just listen to my story, and see if you can figure it out. Where was I?"

"You were saying goodbye to all your friends."

"Oh, yeah. Anyway, it was almost dusk, and I was walking home again. I wasn't even gonna say goodbye to Gertie since, well…she was mean and all, but just as I was turning the corner, I smashed into her. We always seemed to have an uncanny knack for bumping into each other. Well, since she was there, I went ahead and told her that I was moving. And you know what she did?"

"What?"

"She started to cry. I tell you, I didn't get it. I didn't get it at all. Gertie was the toughest girl in school. She could beat up all us guys with both hands tied behind her back. She was constantly picking on me and constantly reminding me of how much she hated me. And now she was crying!"

"Why?"

"That's what I asked her. So, she made up some really lame excuses, like it was allergies, and she was rehearsing for a play and stuff. But I didn't believe her. I backed her into a wall, and I demanded an answer. And do you know what she said?"

"What?"

"She said she didn't want me to move. So, I asked why. And she made up some more lame excuses, but in the end she said it was because she loved me."

"Really? That's kind of hard to believe."

"That's exactly what I thought. I told her I didn't believe her. That's when things got crazy."

"What happened?"

"Well…you know…she just…um…you know…went crazy and…you know…"

"Did she lose her mind?"

"No…she just…use your imagination."

"Grandpa, just tell me."

"Boy, you really are dense, short man. A girl just said she loved me. And this was the same girl who claimed to hate me. I didn't believe her. So, what do you think she did?"

"Beat you up?"

"No! She…um…tried to _make _me believe her."

"How?"

"Good grief! Your poor friend Helen-"

"Helga."

"-Helga, must be going insane with how dense you are!"

"Grandpa, I keep telling you, Helga does _not _like me like me. She doesn't even like me."

"Oh, sure. You go right on believing that, short man. You'll see when your time comes."

Arnold rolled his eyes. "Could you just finish the 'flashback'?"

"Okay, Arnold, but try to stay with me. There are a few things you should know. One, girls are weird."

"Um…okay."

"Two, the more someone says they hate ya, the more they like ya."

"Whatever."

"And third and most importantly, if a girl throws herself at you and starts doing things that you didn't think a nine-year-old was capable of, and you're scared and confused and don't know what to do, the thing is to do nothing! Just let her do what she wants with you, and play along. It'll be over soon enough, and pretty soon wedding bells will be ringing."

"Huh?"

"Sorry, short man, but I'm not giving you any more clues. You'll just have to figure it out on your own."

"Did you move?"

"Did I move? Of course not! Otherwise, I wouldn't be here! I'd be in Nebraska! And you wouldn't even exist!"

"Why not?"

"Cause I never would have seen Gertie again! So, we never would have gotten married and had your dad, so, all in all, you wouldn't exist. Boy, are you lucky that I happened to bump into her!"

"Why did you decide to stay? Did you fall in love with Gertie and refuse to get on the plane?"

"Train."

"Yeah, train."

"Heavens, no! She locked me in a warehouse till the train left."

"Did your family just leave you?"

"No, we just starved for awhile, until my father managed to get a steady job."

"I don't get it! Why on earth did you marry her? I mean, she locked you in a warehouse and caused your family to starve! Why would you marry her?"

"Hey, you try spending two days in the dark with no one for company but a crazy girl who keeps going on and on about how much she adores you! Two days is a _long _time. It's enough time for a guy to start thinking certain thoughts about certain people that he never dreamed he would have. Anyway, to make a long story short-"

"Too late."

"Gertie won. She got her way. She was right. I couldn't resist her. By the time we were outta that warehouse, I was head over heels in love with her. The rest is history."

"Wow. Does that mean that Grandma is Gertie?"

"Well, duh!"

"But, Grandma doesn't act anything like Helga."

"That's cause she lost her mind. But she's still the same old Gertie!"

"Did you call me, Phil?" Arnold's grandmother asked, stepping into the room.

"Grandma! Is it true?"

"What, that he called me? I don't know, that's why I'm asking."

"No! That your name is Gertie and that you did this 'confession' thing…or something like that."

"WHAT?! Of course not. Phil's old, and he's losing his memory."

"I knew it! He was just making it up, wasn't he?"

"Of course!" she said nervously. "Now do you realize that it's ten o'clock? Go to bed!"

"Okay. Boy, I'm glad it was just a story. Goodnight!"

"Pookie! Whatcha do that for?" Phil asked, when Arnold had left the room.

"_No one _is to know about that night. Got it?"

"Pookie, that was seventy something years ago! No one cares!"

"Speak for yourself. You are not to ever tell anything vaguely related to that to _anyone_ ever again."

"But now Arnold won't be prepared for what lies ahead of him!"

"Good! He's not supposed to. It takes the fun out of it."

"Oh, great. Now Arnold's gonna be scarred for life, just because you won't let me tell him anything."

"Arnold?"

"Our grandson."

"We have a grandson?"

"Yes."

"Really? I wonder if he knows that young boy that was just here!"

"Gertie, you're a mystery. I love you, but you're a mystery."


	17. Arnold's Dream

Chapter 17

Arnold's Dream

Arnold walked down the long hallway, past all the border's rooms, and up a tall staircase at the end of the hallway to his room. He stepped inside and shut the door.

"Grandpa sure knows how to make a crazy story," he said out loud. "Like some girl really locked him in a warehouse to prevent him from moving to Nebraska. How gullible does he think I am?" he said, as he climbed into bed.

"He just likes to tease me. There's no way anything could ever happen between Helga and me," he whispered, as he drifted off to sleep.

* * *

"What? Where am I?" Arnold cried, looking around.

He was in a long room with seats on either side. It kind of looked like a plane.

"Hey, man! You're up!"

"Gerald? Gerald, where are we?"

"What do you mean, 'where are we?' We're on a train, remember?"

"A train? Why? Where are we going?"

"To Nebraska, of course!"

"_Nebraska_? Why on earth are we going to Nebraska?"

"Because you have no future back in the city. We're going to Nebraska to start a new life!"

"A new life? But I don't want a new life! I don't want to move! I've got to get back home! I've got to get back to Helga!"

"Helga?"

"Yeah!"

"Helga G. Pataki?"

"Yeah! Gerald, you have to help me get back! Come on, help me stop the train!"

He ran towards the door, but Gerald stepped in front of his path.

"Gerald, what are you doing? Get out of my way!"

"Arnold, you can't go back! You have to stay with me! You have to go to Nebraska to start a new life!"

"No! I'm not starting a new life in Nebraska! I'm going back to the city! I'm going back to Helga! Will you help me or not?"

"Arnold, listen! You have to go! You have to!"

"No! I won't! And you can't make me!" Arnold shouted, trying to shove Gerald aside. "I won't let you keep me from Helga!"

"I hoped I wouldn't have to resort to this," Gerald said slowly, shaking his head, "but it appears I have no choice."

He suddenly stepped aside of the door and pulled it open. He lunged forward, grabbed Arnold's arm, and pushed him through the door.

"Goodbye, man!" he called into the darkness.

Arnold was falling, falling through the inky blackness that surrounded him. He was beginning to get the feeling that he would be falling forever, when suddenly he hit a hard stone floor.

"Ow!" he cried.

He stood up and looked around. All around him was pitch darkness. He couldn't see a thing. He knew absolutely nothing of his surroundings, except that it had a cold, damp, stone floor.

"Where am I?" he whispered.

"Am I? Am I?" his voice echoed.

Suddenly, he thought he heard a sound. It was quiet and muffled and seemed to be come from far away. It sounded a little like someone crying.

"Hello?" he called. "Is someone there?"

"Arnold?" he heard a voice gasp, sounding a little closer. "Arnold! Is that you?"

"Yeah! It's me! Where are you?"

"I don't know! Arnold, I'm so scared! You have to help me!"

"Don't worry!" he called. "Just keep talking! I'll find you!"  
"Hurry, Arnold! Hurry! She's coming!"

"Who's coming?"

"She is! Hurry! You have to find me!"

"I'm coming!" he shouted, running through the dark chamber.

The voice seemed to be getting closer. He was almost there. All of a sudden he crashed into someone and fell backwards onto the floor.

"Arnold?"  
"Yeah, yeah it's me."

"Where are you?"

"Hold out your hand so I can find you."

He felt around in the darkness until he grasped an arm.

"Oh, Arnold!" the person cried, collapsing into his arms. "Arnold, just hold me. And never let go!" The person suddenly threw both of their arms around his neck and hugged tightly. "Just hold me," the person repeated.

"Don't worry," Arnold said, hugging the person back. "Everything's going to be okay."

He didn't know who on earth this stranger was, but whoever they were, they were obviously very frightened, and he wanted to help them.

Without warning, the floor started to shake. A loud thundering noise seemed to fall all around them.

"Oh, no!" the person screamed. "She's found us!"

"Who? What's going on?"

They saw a faint red glow coming from a distant corner of the room. They watched as it got bigger and bigger until the entire room was lit up with red light.

"HELGA?" Arnold exclaimed, realizing who the person was. He quickly stood up. He watched as she slowly stood up too. "Helga? What are you doing here?"

"I was waiting for you," she said softly, staring at the floor.

"Waiting for me? Why?"

"I was scared."

"Scared of what?"

"Of her. Oh, Arnold, it was wicked and selfish of me to lead you here. Now we will both be under her terrible wrath. I'm so sorry!" She began to cry again.

"No, don't cry!" he said. "Please don't cry." When she failed to obey him, he took hold of her both her shoulders and pulled her towards him, forcing her to look at him. "Listen!" he exclaimed, shaking her slightly. "I'm not mad at you! Don't cry! I don't know where we are, or why, but-"

"Get away from her."

Helga flinched.  
"Who was that?" Arnold asked.

"Her."

Arnold looked around and noticed something he hadn't before. In the far corner of the room was a shadowy figure.

"Get away from her," the figure repeated, stepping into the light.

"_Lila_?"

"Not just Lila. I am now Lila, Mistress of Evil. Now get away from her!"

"Lila?" Arnold said, letting go of Helga and taking a step towards Lila. "What are you doing here?"

"I should be asking you the same question. Why are you in my dungeon?"

"I have to save Helga."

"Helga, Helga, Helga, is that all you ever think about?"

"No, but she's in trouble! I have to save her! What have you done with her anyway? Why have you brought her here?"

"To keep her away," Lila explained. "With her locked in here forever she will never interfere with us again! Oh, Arnold, we can finally be together!"

"Why would I want to be with you?"

"Because you love me."

"Says who?"

"Says me."

"Since when were you in charge of who I loved?"

"Since I felt like it."

"Well, you're not. I don't love you."

"What are you talking about? Of course you love me. Everyone loves me! I'm perfect!"

"You're right. You are perfect. You're too perfect."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I mean that no one could possibly be that perfect. It's impossible. You're not really perfect. You're just acting perfect to get attention. Besides, you just said that you were the ruler of evil of something."

"You know what Arnold? You're right. I am evil. I'm evil, and I'm proud of it!"

"Why?"

"None of your business. The point is, I am. I am the Mistress of the greatest organization to ever be established. E.V.I.L. That stands for Every Villain Is Lemons."

"Every villain is _lemons_?"

"Yes! Lemons! Mwahahahah- sorry. I'll stop. We're getting off subject. The point is, with Helga gone, we will have nothing stopping us from ruling the world! Come, Arnold, and we will rule the universe as husband and wife!"

"Lila, you're not talking sense! I can't marry you! We're nine! And besides, I don't love you! Do you not get that? I DON'T LOVE YOU!"

"Why?"

"Because you're a phony little nobody, who thinks they can lock people up in the dark for pleasure! I mean, what did Helga ever do to you anyway?"

"She stole you from me," Lila whispered.

"Excuse me?"

"She stole you from me! I would have had you all to myself if it weren't for her! She's destroying everything! She'll ruin my beautiful scheme!"

"She didn't destroy anything! You're just jealous is all!"

"Jealous of what?"

"I don't know-"

"The fact that you love her and not me?"

"I WHAT?"

"You love her and not me!"

"I never said I _loved_ her! I just said that I had to save her!"

"Arnold, it's either her or me. Make your choice."

"Well, if I had to choose, I'd choose her, of course!"

"No, you wouldn't."

"Yes, I would!"

"No, you wouldn't."

"Yes, I would!"

"Prove it."

"Prove it? How am I supposed to prove it?"

"You can't. Because you wouldn't choose her."

"Yes, I would! I'd choose anyone but you! And I will prove it! Just tell me what I have to do."

Lila stopped and thought for a moment. Then she started to smile a cold, cruel smile.

"Kiss her."

"_What_?"

"Kiss her! If you really would choose her, then you would."

"But-"

"Or maybe you need some persuading," she said, pulling out a sharp dagger.

"You're mad," Arnold said, slowly walking backwards towards Helga, who stifled a gasp.

"Yes, thank you."

"What do you plan to do with that knife?"

"If you do or don't kiss her?"

"Um…both."

"If you don't…let's just say I've been practicing my dart throwing. If you do I won't run you through. Any questions?"

"Have you ever seen a psychologist? Cause I think you need one."

"Kiss her!" Lila screamed, holding the knife up.

"We're gonna die, we're gonna die, we're gonna die," Helga chanted over and over.

"No! We're not! She can't do this! It's…it's murder!"

"She won't care. She won't get caught. No one will ever find us here. No one will ever know. Even if they did, everyone's too nuts about her to do anything about it. I'm the only one who's ever realized what she's really like. That's why she imprisoned me here."

"No…she said she trapped you here because she thought you were stealing me from her or something. I don't know why she thought that. I'd never love someone like her anyway."

"I'm waiting!" Lila exclaimed impatiently.

"Look, can't we just talk this over?" Arnold asked her desperately.

"No. I'd hurry up if I were you. I haven't got all day."

"What are we going to do?" Arnold whispered, turning to face Helga.

"I…well, I-I mean…um…"

"Is there any way out?"

"No. I've searched the whole place. There's nothing. We're trapped."

"I'm counting to five, and then I'm throwing the first knife."

"First?" Arnold asked in disbelief.

"I've got plenty. One…two…three, four, five. Time's up!" she exclaimed, as she hurled the knife straight at Helga.

"Helga! Look out!" Arnold cried, grabbing Helga and throwing her against him, so that the knife just grazed her arm.

She closed her eyes from the pain but didn't cry out. He looked at the thin line of blood on her arm and felt himself burn with anger, just like he had that afternoon. And suddenly, he knew what he had to do.

He pulled Helga back an inch or two and looked at her.

"She's actually kind of pretty," he thought to himself, as he nervously smiled.

"What?" Helga asked, wondering why he was smiling.

"Um…just hold still, okay?"

"What are you talking abo-"

She was suddenly cut off as Arnold pulled her forward and gently pressed his lips to hers. He only kissed her for about two seconds before pulling back. As soon as he did he sort of wished that he hadn't. He had never done anything like that before, but it was amazing. Kind of weird but amazing.

Helga just stared at him, her face a mixture of surprise, wonder, and happiness. Actually, she mostly looked dizzy and confused.

"What, I, um, wait, what-"

"Sorry, Helga. I had to do it."

"Sorry? Arnold, don't you get it? I love you! I absolutely adore you! That was the best thing that ever happened to me in my whole life!"

"Really?" he asked, smiling shyly.

"HOW DARE YOU! HOW DARE YOU!" Lila shrieked. "HOW DARE YOU CHOOSE HER OVER ME! HOW DARE YOU!"

Rapidly, she picked up a handful of knives and hurled them straight at the two of them. There was no escape.

"Helga, I love you too!" he heard himself saying. "I love you!"

"Oh, Arnold, I love you," Helga cried, hugging him with all her might. "I love y-"

* * *

HEY ARNOLD! HEY ARNOLD! HEY ARNOLD! HEY-

Arnold leaned over and shut off his alarm clock.

"Wow. What a night. What a dream! Grandpa and his stupid stories must have gotten to me," he thought, as he sat up in bed. "Good thing it was only a crazy dream."


	18. Chasing the Letter

Chapter 18

Chasing the Letter

"Man, what a night. I feel like I got hit by a truck," Helga groaned, as she got out of bed. "At least it's the weekend. Nothing to do all day but do…nothing."

Suddenly, the events from the previous day came flooding back to her.

"Oh, yeah. I got slammed into a wall. I guess that's why I feel like I got hit by a truck. Good thing my beloved saved me, or I'd probably be in a hospital by now. I wonder if Wolfgang had to go to a hospital… Oh, well. I couldn't care one way or the other."

She walked to her closet and opened the door, prepared to do her 'morning ritual'. She turned on the light and saw pink stationary littering the floor.

"Oh, criminy! My love letter! I forgot all about it!" she exclaimed. "Oh, well, guess there's nothing I can do about it now. I hope he doesn't find out that _I _wrote it. I believe that I would die if that happened. But he won't figure it out, even with the letter. He's too dense."

She started to think about the letter, reading it over in her head.

"Yesterday was so amazing. First Arnold walks me to school, then we get to work on the project together, then Arnold saves me, then he walks me home, then the letter…wait a minute!" she exclaimed, realizing something she hadn't thought of before. "Saving me? Letter? Oh, no. I didn't…I did," she said, thinking of the last sentence that she wrote, 'P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. Thanks for saving me today'.

"Oh…my…" she gasped, before plunging into a bloodcurdling scream.

* * *

"Hey, Grandpa, did you hear something?" Arnold asked.

"No."

* * *

"How could I have been so _stupid_? I must have been too excited when I wrote the letter to realize _what _I was writing! How could I have written that? Now, even though he's so dense, he'll be able to figure out who it was from and then…criminy, I don't even want to think about it. I've got to somehow get that letter back! But…how? I know, maybe the mailman hasn't come yet! Maybe the letter's still in the mail box! Yeah, that's it! That's gotta be it! He _can't _see that letter!"

She quickly got dressed and ran downstairs.

"Helga, do you want some breakfast?" her mother called, as she ran out the door, into the pouring rain.

"Hmm…I am hungry. I _did _skip dinner last night. Maybe I'll just grab a bite."

Just then, she saw a white truck pull up in front of her house. Before she knew what was happening, a man got out of the truck, took the mail out of their mailbox, and drove away.

"WAIT! STOP! COME BACK!" she screamed, as she tore down the street after the truck. However, there was no way she could keep up with it, and it was soon out of sight.

"I. Am. Doomed." she said. "By the time I reach Arnold's house, the mail would have come already. Then again…maybe the mailman will be slow. Maybe Arnold won't get the mail right away. Maybe he's not even home! Who knows? Anyway, it's the only chance I've got, so I might as well take it," she said, as she sped off towards Arnold's house.

About twenty minutes later, she was next to the boardinghouse that Arnold lived in with his grandparents. His grandparents were the owners of the boarding house. A sign on the wall read "No kids. Pets okay."

"Yeah, that makes a lot of sense," she muttered, as waited in the rain for the mailman to get to Arnold's house.

Finally, she saw the white truck pull in front of the red bricked building.

"Hey, Mister!" she called, as the mailman got out of the truck. It wasn't Harvey, the neighborhood's normal mailman; it was a man that she had never even seen before.

"Must be Harvey's day off or something," she thought.

"Hey, kid. What is it?" the man said in an annoyed tone.

"Um…I need one of those letters."

"Are they _your _letters?"

"No, but-"

"If the letters aren't for you, then I can't give them to you."

"I don't want all of them! Just one!"

"Sorry. Those are the rules."

"Listen, pal," Helga said slowly, "I _need _that letter. You have _no _idea how important this is. My entire life is at stake!"

"Not my problem," the mailman said, as he dropped the stack of mail through the mail slot in the door.

"NO!" Helga cried, as she desperately tried to reach her hand through the slot.

"Listen, kid, I'm sorry you can't have the letter, but you can't go around invading people's mail slots! It's against the law!"

"How would you know?"

"My brother's a cop."

"Oh…" Helga said slowly. "Listen, why don't we forget this ever happened, okay?"

"Alright, but I'd stay away from here if I were you, if you know what's good for ya. Now beat it!"

Helga dashed off and hid in an alley next to Arnold's house.

"Kids these days. They're crazy," muttered the mailman, as he got into his truck and drove away.

"Great," Helga muttered. "The blasted letter is only a few feet away from me, and I can't get to it! Stupid mailman. I've got to somehow get inside his house! I must get to that stack of mail before he does! But how?"

Then the fire escape leading up to the top of the house caught her eye.

"Perfect."


	19. I'm in his room

Chapter 19

I'm in his room…

"Arnold, the mail's here! Would you get it?"

"Sure, Grandpa," Arnold said, as he walked over to the door and picked up the stack of mail.

"Bill, bill, Sports Illustrated, bill, postcard from Bill, bill, From Anonymous, bi…From Anonymous? What on earth's that?" he wondered, as he stared at the envelope.

"Short man, hurry up!"

"Coming, Grandpa," Arnold said absentmindedly, as he walked into the kitchen and dropped the mail on the table.

"Hey, wait, Arnold! You forgot one!"

"What, this?" he said, holding up the mysterious letter. "This one's to me."

"From Anonymous, aye? Well, Arnold, I won't say anything since Pookie ordered me not to but…well, whatever. If it's yours, take it."

"Okay," he said, as he walked into the hall, up the stairs to his room, and shut the door.

"From Anonymous," he said, turning the letter over. "That's weird. I wonder what's in it."

* * *

Helga quickly climbed the fire escape and crawled across the roof of the building, until she got to the humongous sky light that was the ceiling of Arnold's bedroom. She quietly peered over the edge.

"Criminy!" she muttered. "I'm too late! He's got the letter! Now what am I supposed to do?"

"Hey, Arnold! Someone's here to see you!"

"Coming, Grandpa!" Arnold called, as he dropped the letter on the bed and walked out of the room.

"Eureka! Here's my chance! Now if only I could get this blasted window thing to open…" she said, fiddling with the lock. "Wait, I think I got it…AHHH!" she screamed, as the pane of glass fell open, and she fell into the room.

She landed on Arnold's bed. She laid there for about half a minute, recollecting herself. When she finally opened her eyes and was staring into the sky.

"Did I die?" she wondered. "Am I in heaven?" Then she glanced around. "No, but close enough."

She slowly sat up. "Wow. I'm in his room," she murmured, taking in her surroundings.

She had landed on a small twin sized bed that was pushed up against one side of the wall. All of the walls were covered with shelves that held lots of electronics. The sky light ceiling had lots of lights installed into it. There was a huge stereo set on one wall and a closet on the other. There was also a red couch that folded in and out of the wall when a button on a remote was pushed. His entire room was fully automated and could be controlled with the remote.

"Wow. What a cool room. Mostly because it's_ his_, and _I'm _in it. This is too good to be true!" she sighed, as she turned around, fell back on the pillow, and breathed deeply, forgetting for the moment her reason for being here. "I've _got _to know what that shampoo is," she said into the pillow.

She lay like that for quite a while and had almost fallen asleep, when she heard footsteps coming up the stairs. She quickly stood up and looked around for a place to hide. She thought about running to the closet, but she would never make it. Against her better judgment, she lay down on the couch, grabbed the remote, and pressed the button. The sofa folded into the wall, and she fell off it.

"Ow! Stupid floor," she mumbled, as she pressed the button to make the couch fold back out again. She was in a small, rectangular space, just big enough for the couch to fit into. She couldn't see a thing, but she could look out a crack between the wall and the couch to see what was going on.


	20. Reading the Letter

**Chapter 20**

**Reading the Letter**

"Man, I'm sorry about what I said yesterday," Gerald said, as he and Arnold walked into the room.

"Yeah. That's okay," Arnold said absentmindedly, still thinking of the letter.

"What's this?" Gerald said, holding up the letter. "From Anonymous? What's that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know. It just came in the mail."

"Well? Aren't you gonna open it?"

"I guess."

"No!" Helga gasped from her hiding place.

"Did you hear something, Gerald?"

"No. Come on man, open it! Let's see what's in it! Maybe it's full of cash or something."

"Yeah. Maybe," Arnold said, as he tore open the flap of the envelope and pulled out the letter. "'_Dearest Arnold_-'"

"'Dearest Arnold'?! What kind of nutcase would write something like that?"

"Idiot," Helga mumbled.

"'_You have no idea how long I've waited to write these blessed words. I have waited for six, long, painstaking years, but at last, Arnold, at last! I am ready to give unto you the most hallowed of secrets._'"

"Wow, Arnold! That must mean that you've been chosen by some sacred weirdo to be the holder of some age old riddle! Like, if the chicken or the egg came first or something!"

"I doubt it. '_Arnold, my darling, my sweet flaxen haired angel, I love you._'?"

"Wow! A sacred weirdo loves you!"

"I love you?! Gerald, this isn't a…whatever you thought it was. This is a love letter!"

"Really?" Gerald asked, before falling to the floor laughing.

"Oh, look, it says it's from Phoebe."

"Huh?!" Gerald said, standing up.

"Just kidding. You know what? I think it's from Lila."

"Arnold! When are you ever gonna get it?! She doesn't like you like you! She just likes you."

"Sure, but she might have just been saying that to cover up her real feelings."

"Right. Keep dreaming, Arnold. And keep reading; I want to see who it's from!"

"Alright. '_Yes, Arnold, yes! I love you! I've loved you ever since I first laid eyes on your wonderful, sweet football head!_'"

"Boy, this girl's got it bad."

"Stop interrupting!"

"Oh, yeah, you just can't wait to see what other wonderful things your secret admirer says about you," he teased.

"Gerald!"

"Okay, okay. Keep going."

"'_But until now I've been too scared to come out with it, too shy to tell you that I absolutely adore you!_' Seriously, Gerald, I think it might be Lila. She seems to be the type that would have a secret crush."

"No, she doesn't! She's the one who came out with loving you, dumping you, loving your cousin, and a whole bunch of other stuff. She's more of the open book type."

"She is not! Well…oh, well. We'll find out. '_I know you don't know who I am (at least, I hope so), but here's one major clue…_' I'm telling you, Gerald! It's Lila!"

"Why don't you read the clue before you jump to any false conclusions?"

"Fine. '_I'm not Lila._' Oh. Well…okay, you were right."

"Ha. Told you."

"Don't rub it in."

"Ha-ha, football head!" Helga whispered. "Little Miss Perfect isn't your secret admirer. Ha. I am. But you can't find that out!"

"'_She doesn't like you like you! Get it through your thick skull! I'm the only one for you!_'"

"Yeah, Arnold! Get it through your thick skull! Lila doesn't like you like you!"

"I think she meant that I should get that she was the only one for me."

"Yeah, well maybe I mean both, ya morons!"

"Did you here something?"

"Man, Arnold! Stop concentrating on every stupid noise that you hear, and get back to reading the letter!"

"Right. '_Love, love, love times one million, (Ha! You didn't think I'd actually tell you, did you?)_' Well, that's disappointing."

"What a rip off! All that, and we _still_ don't know who it is!"

"It's not over yet. There's still a bunch of 'P.S.'s' and stuff."

"Then read them!"

"Oh, no. He's almost to the final sentence. And when he reads that final sentence…I'm not even gonna go that far. What am I doing, just sitting here? I've got to do something!" Helga whispered.

"'_P.S. You're so dense! I can't believe you haven't figured out who I am yet! Hurry up!'"_

"That's nice. She goes from calling you 'sweet angel' to 'dense'."

"Yeah. It's like she loves me and hates me at the same time."

"You got it, bucko," Helga whispered, surprised that Arnold had figured out at least that much. "Now what should I do? How can I get out of this mess?"

"'_P.P.S. The little pink book was mine, the locket was mine, the parrot was mine, all the poems Mr. Simmons ever read were about you, by me, and the heart on the wall that said 'Arnold loves Lila' was written by me._'"

"The who, what, and which?"

"Well, you know about that little book we found that was filled with poems about me."

"Oh, yeah!" Gerald exclaimed. "Those were the corniest poems I ever read!"

"Sure, if you don't appreciate poetry. It's actually unusually good. Most people can't write good poetry."

"He likes my poems?!" Helga thought, almost dying from excitement.

"Whatever you say, man. And what's with 'the locket'?"

"Oh, that. One day I just found a locket with my picture in it, but I couldn't get the clasp to open. Then one day it was just gone again."

"Okay… You know what, Arnold? It sounds like this person's stalking you. I mean, it just disappeared? What, was she just hiding in your house, waiting until you weren't looking so she could take it? Do you think she's hiding somewhere right now, watching you read her letter, to see what your reaction is?"

"I think you're getting too into this, Gerald."

"Hey, it could happen! And what did she say about 'a parrot'? Good grief, what on _earth _does a parrot have to do with anything?"

"I found this parrot one day, and it started reciting poetry, like in that little book. Then it got eaten by a giant lizard."

"Pleasant. But what about the heart with you and Lila?"

"That's what I'm wondering! I bet she really _is _Lila, and she's just now getting the courage to tell me! See, watch. '_P.P.P.S. No! I'm not Lila! I just changed the name so you (and other people) wouldn't find out._'"

"So ends all hope of you ever being with Lila, right?"

"No. It just ends all hope of this secret admirer being Lila."

"Oh, sure."

"Then it just says P.S. I love you and a bunch of X's and O's and stuff like that."

"And now you're gonna get the other sheet of paper and read my last, fatal remark, aren't you? Well, not if I have anything to say about it!" Helga thought, as she reached into her pocket and pulled out a cell phone. Then she dialed Arnold's number. She could hear the phone ring from somewhere down the hall and then someone pick up the other end of the line.

"Hello, you have reached the Sunset Arms boardinghouse. Would you like to rent a room?"

"Uh, no," Helga whispered, as quietly as she could. "Can I speak to Arnold?"

"Could you speak up a bit? I can't quite hear you."

"Arnold. I want to talk to Arnold!" she said, a bit louder.

"Arnold? Well, okay, he's in his room. I'll get him. HEY, ARNOLD! PHONE!"

"Tell them I'm coming!" he called, as he dropped the letter on the floor and walked out of the door with Gerald.


	21. Trapped

**Chapter 21**

**Trapped**

"Eureka! They're gone!" Helga cried, as she pushed the button twice on the remote so that it lifted her back into his room.

"Hello?" Arnold said into the phone.

"Hey, football head, it's me, Helga."

"Helga?!" Arnold cried, thinking for a second about his dream.

"No, Mary Queen of Scots. Listen, don't get the idea that I'm calling to talk to _you_ or anything. I just…um…left my math book at school, and I need the problems for the homework Mr. Simmons assigned us," she said, as she quickly picked up the letter and stood up.

"But…he didn't assign us any homework."

"Well…I didn't finish my class work, so I need the last, uh, three problems of it."

"Okay. Gerald, could you run upstairs and get my math book? It should be on my desk."

"Your _math book_? Whatever, man," he said, as he walked towards Arnold's room.

"What?!" Helga exclaimed, as soon as she heard what was happening. She got so scared that she dropped the letter. "Criminy! He's coming! I don't have time to make it to the fire escape. I've got to hide again!"

Then she heard Gerald's footsteps on the stairs. She quickly picked up a page of the letter, shoved it in her pocket, and jumped back on the couch. She pressed the button so fast that the couch slammed into the wall, and the remote flew out of her hand.

"Oh…my…" she whispered, realizing the worst. She was trapped behind Arnold's couch! Of all the horrible things, why'd it have to be this?

Helga heard Gerald come into the room and get the math book, then head back downstairs.

"Okay, Helga?" Arnold said, "Here are the problems. Three point five divided by-"

"Criminy! How the heck am I gonna get out of here?"

"Huh?"

"Uh…nothing. Uh…you have the wrong number!" she cried, as she hit the 'end call' button.

"Hello? Hello?"

"Who was it, man?" Gerald asked.

"It was either Helga or a prank phone caller."

"Knowing her, it was both. Come on, let's go finish reading that letter."


	22. Arnold's Valentine

**Chapter 22**

**Arnold's Valentine**

Helga was freaking out. She was trapped in pitch darkness in this tight little place, which was even more crowded now that the couch also occupied it. She had no light to see by so she couldn't even see if she had grabbed the right sheet of paper. Worst of all, the blasted remote was out in his room! How on earth was she supposed to get out without his finding out?

"Hey, Gerald, wasn't the couch out when we left?"

"I don't think so. It was in when I came up."

"If you say so," Arnold said, flipping the couch out again.

Now Helga had a little more room, but not by much.

"Alright, now finish reading that letter."

"That's the end of it."

"I thought there was another page?"

"I know, so did I! Where'd it go?"

"Wow, Arnold! Your secret admirer strikes again!"

"Come on, Gerald, we probably just misplaced it. Or maybe it didn't exist in the first place."

"Whatever. Who do you think wrote it?"

"Cecile."

"_Who_?!"

"Cecile. You know, my French pen pal."

"I thought she went back to France."

"Not the _real_ Cecile. The…other one."

"Huh?"

"Didn't I ever tell you what happened that Valentine's Day?"

"No."

"Good grief. Okay. You know how I used to love that sixth grader, Ruth?"

"Oh, yeah. Whatever happened to her?"

"I'll tell you if you be quiet. Well, that one time we had to make Valentine's Day cards in class I made one for Ruth, asking her to meet 'anonymous' at Chez Pierre for dinner."

"Yeah. A sixth grader's really gonna go on a date with a fourth grader."

"Yeah, but _she _didn't know I was a fourth grader. Anyway, then I got a letter from my pen pal Cecile saying that she was coming over from France and that she wanted me to go with her to Chez Paris on Valentine's Day."

"Oh, yeah, I remember this. And you had to run back and forth between the restaurants to try to keep both of the girls happy."

"Right!"

"Okay, but I don't really know what went on _inside_ the restaurants. You know?"

"Well, Ruth just turned out to be a spoiled brat who thought of nothing but her hair."

"And Cecile?"

"Well…let's just say…"

"Lila's got competition?"

"You don't get it, Gerald! There wouldn't be a competition! Cecile was the most beautiful, funny, nice, caring girl I've ever met in my entire life! I'd give up Lila in a heartbeat over her!"

Helga's heart skipped a beat. Arnold didn't know of course, but she and Cecile were one and the same.

"So what happened?"

"Basically I just kept switching restaurants. I had a really good time with Cecile, and I learned that Ruth was an overrated no-brainer."

"Gee, I wonder what I kept telling you. She's in sixth grade! You're in fourth! You could never be together!"

"I know that _now_. But then I was really disappointed. I went back to Cecile, and I guess she could tell I was upset cause she asked me what was wrong. So, I told her that there was a girl who I liked, but I just figured out that she wasn't really all she was meant to be. Cecile was really understanding. She said, I'll never forget this, she said 'Maybe she is not the girl for you. Maybe the girl for you is someone you didn't expect. After all, the most beautiful gift can come in the plainest box'."

"Where'd she get that jazz?"

"I don't know. I guess she thought it up."

"Weird. So, then what happened?"

"Well, at some point Cecile said that she really liked me and wanted to know if I liked her back."

"And you said yes?"

"No, I said I had to go do something and went back to Chez Pierre cause it had been awhile since I had switched restaurants."

"Arnold, you're never gonna get her to keep liking you if you won't answer her stupid question!"

"I know. When I got back to Chez Paris she was standing outside the restaurant, and I'm pretty sure she knew what was going on with Ruth and all. She got really mad and threw the red sandals she was wearing at me and then…then the real Cecile showed up."

"Huh?"

"This other girl came up and said that _she_ was Cecile. Then you came."

"And _I _took the _real _Cecile off your hands. I remember now. Nice girl but…I've seen better."

"Yeah, like Phoebe."

"Well…that's beside the point. What became of you and the fake Cecile? Who was she?"

"Well…I don't really know."

"YOU DON'T KNOW?!"

"After you guys left, she was just really shy and nervous and stuff, and we weren't really sure what to do, so we both bent to pick up her shoes at the same time, and we both ended up picking up one shoe, and then I asked her who she was…"

"And?"

"She said 'I can't tell you'."

"But you demanded her to, right?"

"No. If she didn't want to tell me, she didn't have to. I could tell she wanted to keep it a secret. So, I asked if I would ever see her again, and she said probably. But I wasn't sure, so I took her hand and told her that this was the best Valentine's Day I had ever had."

"Man, you're so corny."

"And she said that it was her's too but that she had to go," Arnold went on, ignoring Gerald. "So I told her that we would always have Chez Paris. Then I kissed her."

"You WHAT?!"  
"On the hand!"

"Still! Arnold, you're nine!"

"Too bad."

"Arnold, you're crazy. Can you name one kid who's ever been kissed before in our whole class?"

"Curly kissed Rhonda. On the lips. Twice."

"Yes, but Curly's a psycho freak who hatched out of an egg from Mars. You can kind of expect those things from him. But not from you. You're different."

"I've been kissed twice."

"Arnold, you're crazy! I know I already said that, but it's true. You're crazy."

"Gee, thanks."

"Who kissed you?"

"Helga."

"HELGA?!"

"Helga."

"Helga?"

"Helga."

"You mean _the _Helga?"

"I only know of one."

"Helga G. Pataki?"

"Yeah. What's your point?"

"Arnold, Helga wouldn't do something like that. In case you haven't noticed…SHE HATES YOU! She's constantly picking on you! Her goal in life is to make you miserable! And now you tell me that she kissed you?! When was this?"

"Don't get so excited. They weren't really 'real'. They were both acting. She kissed me for that Romeo and Juliet play and when we won this sandcastle thing, and the prize was to be on this show, and that was part of the script."

"You had me worried there for a second. But that would have been stupid if I thought she kissed you for real. She's too mean to do anything like that."

"How come you always have to take everything out on her?" Arnold asked.

"What do you mean?"

"How come whenever I even mention her you start going on and on about how mean she is?"

"Because she is."

"She's not really! She just has unsolved conflicts to work out, only she doesn't know what to do about them, so she takes them out on people."

"She takes them out on you!"

"Well, yeah…"

"And all this stuff about unsolved junk is just psychology garbage. It doesn't mean anything. Helga is a mean, evil, cruel bully, and that's all there is to it."

"You know what, Gerald? Maybe you should try to get to know someone before you decide that they're mean. Helga's not mean. She just acts mean for some reason. I'm sure of it."

"Man, Arnold, how come you're always sticking up for her?"

"Because someone has to when she's being unrightfully judged."

"Whatever. You can think whatever you want, Arnold. It might not make any sense, but you can still think it. Besides, we're getting off subject."

"Right. What were we even talking about?"

"Cecile. And your letter."

"Oh, yeah. So, I kissed her, and then she just kind of left. And I've never seen her since."

"You let her get away just like that?"

"Yeah. I figure she'll tell me who she is when she's ready."

"But you just said you've never seen her since!"

"Actually, I probably have. I bet the first time she was in a disguise."

"You mean so you wouldn't figure out who she really was?"

"Yeah. And it worked too. Up until now I hadn't a clue who she was."

"And now you do?"

Helga gasped. Did he know?

"Well, not really, but I do have one major hint. She's in our class."

"How do you know?"

"Because in the letter she said that all the love poems Mr. Simmons ever read out loud to the class were about me, from her."

"So, you're saying she'd have to be in our class because she'd have to have written the poems for those creative writing things or something."

"Exactly. And all we have to do is figure out who she is."

"Okay…who's in our class?"

"Lila?" Arnold asked hopefully.

"No."

"Phoebe?"

"_Definitely_ no. What did Cecile look like anyway?"

"She had soft, wavy, blond hair that glowed in the moon light and-"

"Wow, you really are stuck on this girl, aren't you? Okay, blond hair. Who in our class has blond hair?"

"Gloria, but it's not her. She was nothing like her."

"Nadine?"

"No."

"Was she wearing a wig or something?"

"I doubt it. It could be, but her hair looked too beautiful to be a wig."

"Right. Considering it was though. Rhonda?"

"Too snobbish."  
"Sheena?"

"Too tall."

"And you're sure it's not Gloria?"

"Too nice."

"Too _nice_?"

"Like, Gloria couldn't get mad even if she wanted to. But Cecile got mad. Cecile got really mad a couple times. That's one of the things I like about her. Her fiery temper."

"Yeah. Sure. Arnold, we've named just about everyone in our class."

"What about me, ya moron?" Helga thought, although she didn't really want them to think of her.

"There's got to be someone we're forgetting. I'm getting out my yearbook. Then we can try to figure out who she is," Arnold said, as he walked to one of his shelves and pulled out a book.

"Arnold, there's no one in here we haven't already mentioned!" Gerald said, flipping through the yearbook. "Rhonda, Lila, Nadine, Gloria, Helga, Phoebe-"

"Helga? We didn't mention her."

"That's because there's no way it could be her! We had this talk before, remember?"

"She has blond hair."

"Arnold, you're denser than that person said. HELGA HATES YOU! END OF DISCUSSION!"

"How do you know?"

"What, do you _want _her to like you?"


	23. The Dream

**Chapter 23**

**The Dream**

"No, it's just…my head's all messed up today. It's all because of that stupid dream."

"What dream?" Gerald asked. "You didn't tell me about any dream."

"I wasn't really planning on it. It's just a weird dream. You'd just laugh."

"No, I wouldn't. And even if I did, it wouldn't matter. We're best friends. You're supposed to tell me these things."

"I don't have to tell you anything!" Arnold snapped.

"No, but you should, if you want to stay friends."

"Fine, fine. I just had a dream that I was on a train to Nebraska, and I wanted to go back to the city, back to Helga-"

"Back to _Helga_?"

"Hey, I told you it was crazy. It was probably because Grandpa was going on and on about Helga and I being perfect for each other because Grandma acted just like her or something. It doesn't mean anything."

Helga didn't care that it didn't mean anything. He had dreamt about her! The boy that she had dreamt about almost every night since she was three years old finally had had a dream about her! She eagerly listened for the rest of the dream.

"Anyway, I wanted to go back, but you wouldn't let me. You wouldn't help. You pushed me out the door and into this dungeon."

"Good. If it's Helga or Nebraska, I'd choose Nebraska."

"Gerald! That's just what you were like in my dream!" Arnold exclaimed, shocked.

"Well…good. So, you were in a dungeon?"

"Yeah, and I couldn't see anything. It was pitch black. Then I heard someone crying, so I called out to see who it was. I still didn't really know who it was, but they sounded really scared, so I wanted to help them-"

"Knowing you."

"And I found the person, only I still didn't know who she was."

"She?"

"Yeah. It was obviously a girl. Then she kind of fell into my arms and…stuff like that, and all she kept saying was that 'she' was coming."

"Who's 'she'?"

"That's what I wanted to know, but she wouldn't really tell me. Then these weird lights came on, and then Lila was there."

"Figures. So, Lila was the girl?"

"No…Lila just kind of appeared. The girl was…Helga."

"Helga?!"

"Yeah."

"Helga G. Pataki?"

"Yes! Helga G Pataki! What is it with you and saying her whole name?"

"I say it on the off chance that you're talking about a different Helga, one that is actually nice and has some minuscule thought for the feelings of others! Because the Helga that you keep describing isn't in the least bit the same Helga that I know."

"Well, maybe you just don't know her well enough."

"What? And you do?"

"Well…not really. But I do know that she has a kinder, gentler side; that she's not always so mean. I've seen her do things that…she just wouldn't do if she was. I know that she might be mean on the outside, but inside she's really…well, I don't know. Helga's just kind of a mystery. But I know that deep down she's really not that bad."

"Arnold, are you feeling okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because…oh, never mind. I can see there's no way to change your mind."

"Oh, Arnold!" Helga whispered from her hiding place, "My sweet prince, you figured me out! Kind of. But you don't think that I'm mean! You won't let Gerald say unkind, though possibly true, things about me! You're really sticking up for me! I don't get it! Why? How do you know? And why the heck are you having dreams about me?"

"So, then what happened?" Gerald asked.

"Well…Lila was weird. She kept going on and on about how she was evil and liked lemons or…something."

"_Lemons_?! Arnold, did you eat any of your Grandma's cooking last night? Maybe that's why you're so screwed up."

"Gerald," Arnold sighed, frustrated. "Can't you just listen without trying to make up reasons for stuff?"

"Probably not."

"Oh, brother. So, then Lila kept saying that Helga was stealing me from her-"

"Huh?"

"I know, I don't get it either. Then she said that I loved Helga and not her, and I said that I didn't love Helga, I was just trying to save her, and she said I had to choose between the two of them, and I said that I'd choose-"

"Lila?"

"Lila," Helga sighed miserably.

"Helga."

"Helga?!"

"Me?!"

"I thought you loved Lila?"

"I do, it's just this crazy dream it was, well, crazy! Lila got really mad and wouldn't believe it. Then she told me to prove it."

"How the heck would you prove something like that?"

"That's what I said. And she said I had to kiss her."

"_Kiss her_?!"

"Kiss me?!"

"Yeah. And then she pulled out a dagger and said that if I didn't then she would throw it at us and kill us."

"Violent. So, did you die?"

"Well…almost. She threw a knife at Helga, so I grabbed her so she wouldn't get hit, but it scraped her arm. I got really mad that she got hurt so…so I kissed her."

"You _WHAT_?!"

"You did?" Helga whispered, resisting the urge to faint, so that she could hear the rest.

"Yeah. Just to save her."

"Wow. You poor kid. What a nightmare."

"I never said it was a nightmare. It was actually okay. I mean…well, kind of…exciting I guess."

"Exciting? Arnold, you're one crazy kid."

"Maybe. Who knows? Anyway, after that Lila got really mad and threw a handful of knives at us, and there was no escape. And then…then Helga said she loved me, and then I said that I loved her too, and then I woke up."

That was just too much for Helga. She fainted dead away.

"Man, Arnold! I don't get it! I just don't get it! Why on earth would you dream about Helga?"

"Because of that story Grandpa told me, I guess."

"Wow, Arnold! You really ought to have your head examined."

"How come you always have to do that Gerald? How come you always have to insult me? And Helga? What do you have against her? How come you're always just so…mean?"

"I'm not mean! I'm just truthful."

"You are mean! Admit it, you are! You go on and on about Helga, but she's an angel compared to you!"

"I don't have to stay here and be insulted!" Gerald shouted.

"Then don't! Go!"

"Fine! I will!" Gerald said, storming out of the room and slamming the door.


	24. The Little Pink Book

**Chapter 24**

**The Little Pink Book**

Arnold sighed and sat down on the couch. Grandpa had been right about one thing at least. It wasn't worth trying to hold onto friends. Not unless they were 'really' special.

"Really special," he thought, thinking about his secret admirer. He got up and pulled out a small pink book. It had been months since he had seen this book. He opened it up and began to read.

_Cowlicks, like fields_

_of yellow corn,_

_All the days of my week,_

_I write the name_

_I dare not speak_

_The boy with the_

_cornflower hair,_

_My beloved,_

_and my despair._

He turned the page and read the next poem.

_Your eyes, like two _

_green jellybeans,_

_Are pools I want to bathe in._

_My head doth swoon,_

_and yet,_

_I want to beat_

_your face in._

That sounded an awful lot like something that Cecile, or whoever she was, would do.

_Arnold you idiot,_

_I've always worn it_

_I've always loved you_

_My darling, my darling._

_Kiss me, my darling,_

_Oh so shamed, my_

_prometheus, Wandering_

_the dismal deserts of my tormented soul._

My tormented soul? Poor girl. He hoped she wasn't that unhappy that he hadn't figured out who she was yet.

_To Arnold with the _

_red-hot lips,_

_Your football head_

_Your awesome face,_

_Your grungy chic,_

_Your cat-like grace_

_Whose red-hot lips do _

_I want to taste?_

_Three guesses stupid:_

_Arnold, Arnold, Arnold!!_

Arnold blushed. "She's a good writer," he thought, smiling.

_Arnold my love,_

_My sultry preteen,_

_Why must I hold you only_

_whilst I dream? Will I be_

_forever enslaved by your spell?_

_Why must I worship you and _

_never ever tell?_

_Arnold you make my girlhood tremble. _

_My senses all go wacky._

_Someday I'll tell the world,_

_my love… Or my name's not _

_!!_

He sighed. "Why'd she have to cross out her name?" he thought. "Why couldn't she just leave it and save me all the trouble of wondering?"

_Each morn, I see you_

_bend to drink,_

_From love's own crystal pool._

_I tremble near you,_

_try to think._

_Will I forever say _

"_You stink"?_

_Am I bound by this _

_tragic rule?_

So, she saw him everyday? How come he didn't notice her? How come she'd never come out and admit who she was? He turned the page, but all he saw was a jagged line running down the page.

"Helga," he thought. She had ripped that page just when he was about to read it.

He asked her why, and she just said, "For spitball of the day, football head."

Arnold sighed. "What was on that page?" he thought. "It spelled out something. H is for the head I'd like to punt. E is for…or was it A? And then it was a…I can't remember," he thought, frustrated. "Why'd you have to do that, Helga?" he asked out loud, before he put the book on the couch and left his room.


	25. The True Story of Cecile

**Chapter 25**

**The True Story of Cecile**

"Oh, Arnold, at last, you're mine!" Helga exclaimed sleepily, as she sat up. "Ow!" she cried, as she hit her head on the ceiling. "Where the heck am I? Oh, yeah. I'm trapped behind Arnold's couch." She looked out of the crack at Arnold's clock. "Five o'clock! Criminy! How long did I sleep?" She leaned against the wall.

"Well, this is it, I guess. I'll just starve to death in here, and no one will even notice until the smell of rotting flesh starts to get on everyone's nerves. Then they'll conduct a full course investigation, and they'll finally find the body of a poor, helpless girl, a piece of paper clutched in her hand. Arnold will read it, and he'll realize the horrible truth, that his secret admirer is me. He'll feel so guilty that he'll start to realize his true feelings for me, and he'll be so depressed by the fact that it's too late that he'll…jump off a bridge or something. Boo hoo. Serves him right! Well, now all I have to do is wait until I die."

She sat there for about an hour and started thinking about what Arnold had said. He loved Cecile? Did that mean that he loved her? Well, he didn't know she was Cecile, of course. She thought back to that Valentine's Day…

* * *

_Helga found an unopened letter from Arnold's pen pal, Cecile. She decided that this would be the perfect thing to get her to spend Valentine's Day with Arnold without him knowing who she was. She changed some words on the letter and made it say that 'Cecile' was coming on Valentine's Day and wanted to have dinner with Arnold at Chez Paris. _

_She wore a red skirt and a pink long sleeved shirt, and her hair ended up being down. She also wore a pair of red, high heeled sandals, of which she only had one now._

_She had a great time with Arnold, except that he kept disappearing every ten minuets. Now she knew where to. She didn't care anymore though, since he didn't love Ruth by the end of the night. Now he loved Lila._

"But he likes me better," Helga thought. "Cecile, anyway."

_At some point she had told Arnold that she really liked him a lot and asked if he liked her back. There was no risk in doing this, since she wasn't Helga. She was Cecile. But he didn't tell her. He ran off to Ruth again._

_She had gotten really mad that he disappeared. She ran outside and threw her shoes at him. Then the real Cecile had shown up. It was really confusing, and she didn't remember much, except that Gerald was there, and he pretended that _he _was Arnold, and then the real Cecile went with him. Then she was alone with Arnold._

_They both reached down to pick up her shoes, and their eyes met. He picked up one shoe, and she picked up the other one. Then he asked who she was, but she said she couldn't tell. _

_Surprisingly, he let it go at that. He just asked if he would ever see her again. She laughed and told him probably. He said that it had been the best Valentine's Day he had ever had. She said she thought so too, but she was afraid that he would start to ask her more questions, so she said that she had to go. He told her that they would always have Chez Paris, and then he had done the last thing she would have expected. He grabbed her hand and kissed it. _

"_Au revoir, Arnold," she had called, before disappearing down an ally. She was in such a daze that she didn't realize that she only had one of her shoes._

_

* * *

_

Helga leaned against the wall and sighed. That was a night she would never forget.


	26. Goodnight

**Chapter 26**

**Goodnight**

Helga peered out of the crack again.

"Five fifty-one," she muttered.

She glanced down, and her eyes fell on her little pink book.

"Stupid book. That was a lot more trouble than it was worth."

She still remembered the poem she had written on the last page, the poem that had almost given away her secret.

_**H**__ is for the head I'd_

_like to punt._

_**E**__ is for every time I_

_see the little runt._

_**L**__ is longing for our _

_firstest kiss._

_**G**__ is for how good _

_that longing is. . . . ._

_**A**__ is for Arnold. Doi!_

When she dropped her book in a pile of Gerald's books, and her book ended up in the hands of Arnold, she felt sure she was going to die. Especially when he read the last page.

But she didn't die, and the world didn't end. He'd read through the whole book, but she tore out the last page before he could get to it. Her secret was safe. She always managed to somehow get out of tight spots. This was no different. She'd get out. Somehow.

"I'm starving!" she suddenly realized. "Criminy! I haven't had anything to eat since…that stupid candy bar at lunch yesterday! And that was only half a candy bar! Sure, I shared it with Arnold, so it was the best thing I've ever eaten in my life, but it's not holding out to good! I've got to get something to eat!" She felt around in the dark.

"Criminy! There's nothing here! Wait a minute…eureka!" she cried, as she held up a red lollipop. "Great, now I can be poisoned with stale candy. Awe, what the heck, it's Arnold's stale candy, isn't it? I'll live." With that, she popped it into her mouth.

"Cherry probably. It's hard to tell. It already lost most of its flavor. Okay, now to think of a plan." But try as she might, she couldn't think of a way to escape without being caught.

"Maybe I could break through the floor like last time I was here," she thought, hitting it. "Ow! This is harder than before. They must have replaced the rotting wood. Okay, scratch that idea. But what am I going to do?" She sighed and glanced at the clock.

"Seven forty-seven. Hmm…well, no reason to be bored while I think of something," she thought, as she pulled out her most recent poetry book.

_Cherish is the word I use to describe_

_all the feeling that I have hiding here for you inside._

_You don't know how many times I've wished that I had told you,_

_you don't know how many times I've wished that I could hold you,_

_you don't know how many times I've wished that I could mold you_

_into someone who could cherish me as much as I cherish you._

_Perish is the word that more than applies_

_to the hope in my heart each time I realize_

_that I am not gonna be the one to share your dreams,_

_that I am not gonna be the one to share your schemes,_

_that I am not gonna be the one to share what seems _

_to be the life that you could cherish as much as I do yours._

_I'm beginning to think that man has never found_

_the words that could make you want me;_

_that have the right amount of letters, just the right sound_

_that could make you hear, make you see_

_that you are driving me out of my mind._

_I could say I need you, but then you'd realize_

_that I want you, just like a thousand other girls_

_who'd say they loved you, with all the rest of their lies,_

_when all they wanted was to touch your face, your hands_

_and gaze into your eyes._

_

* * *

_

"Goodnight, Grandma, goodnight, Grandpa," Arnold called, as he stepped into his room. The smell of lasagna floated up from the kitchen.

"Food," Helga murmured desperately.

Arnold closed the door. He reached under his bed and pulled out a box. From inside the box he pulled out a red, high heeled sandal.

"Where are you, Cecile?" he whispered, staring at the shoe. "Or secret admirer, whoever you are. Where are you? _Who _are you?" He sighed and put the shoe back in the box.

"Maybe someday I'll know," he said, climbing into bed. "I wish she could hear me. I wish she could somehow know that I'm thinking of her. I wish she could know…how much I love her. Well, goodnight, whoever you are."

"Goodnight, my beloved," Helga whispered. "He loves me. He loves me! He doesn't know it's me, but still. He loves me. This is, despite the fact that I'm going to die behind a couch, the best day of my life."

The clock read eight sixteen.


	27. Evening Encounter

**Chapter 27**

**Evening Encounter**

Another hour dragged by. And another. And another. Helga lay on the floor, too weak from hunger to move.

"I can't give in," she thought. "I can't let him know I'm here. I'll die before I'll let him know."

Another hour ticked by.

"I wish I'd just hurry up and die, so I could stop being hungry. Maybe I could wake him- NO! I can't let myself think that. I'll survive. I don't need his help."

Two more hours came and went. Helga lay huddled against the wall.

"Help," she quietly sobbed. "Somebody help." She struggled to sit up. "I-I'll get Arnold. He'll help me," she whispered, half delirious.

"Arnold?" she whispered, peering through the crack. "Arnold?" she tried a bit louder. He moaned and rolled over.

"Arnold!" she cried out loud, as she started to sob uncontrollably.

"What? Who's there?" Arnold asked, sitting up.

Helga gasped and stopped crying. What had she done? What was he going to do? She didn't care. She was too hungry. She just wanted to get out.

"Who's there?" Arnold asked again, as he grabbed a flashlight. He quickly shone it around the room.

"A-Arnold?" Helga whispered.

"Where are you?"

"B-behind the couch."

"Behind the couch?" he asked, walking over to it. "What do you mean? Who are you?"

"Help," Helga murmured softly.

"Who are you?" Arnold asked again, as he shined the flashlight into the crack.

"Arnold, help."

"_HELGA_?!" he cried, as he peered into the space.

"Um…hi."

"Helga?! What are you doing here?"

"I'm trapped in here," she said, ignoring his question.

"How'd you get in there?"

"Arnold, please get me out."

"But-"

"Arnold!" she cried helplessly.

"Don't worry, I'll get you out," he said, picking up the remote. "Just hang on. Okay, here," he said, as he pushed the button which brought the couch into the wall. "Are you on?"

"Y-yes."

"Okay," he said, as he pushed the button again, which sent the couch rocketing out again. Helga fell off the couch and lay on the floor, her eyes closed.

"Helga?" Arnold said, kneeling beside her. "Are you okay? Helga?"

She opened her eyes. "Arnold?!" she gasped, forgetting for a second where she was.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes," she said, trying to sit up and falling back again. "No."

"Are you hurt?"

She shook her head.

"Then what's wrong?"

"Help."

"O-okay. I'll help," he said. He helped her up and half carried, half dragged her over to the sofa. He sat down next to her. "Now will you tell me why you're here? And why you were behind my couch?"

"Food."

"Food?"

"Food. Bring me food. I haven't eaten in two days."

"No wonder you're so weak! Stay there, I'll be right back," he said, before going downstairs.

"I'm dead," Helga thought. "Or I'm going to be. There's no way I can escape this one. He'll find out. Somehow, he'll find out."

Arnold came back into the room.

"Here, eat this," he said, handing her a bowl of lasagna.

She didn't need to be asked twice. She devoured the meal in one minute flat. Arnold waited patiently until she was done and had placed the bowl on the floor.

"Are you okay now?" he asked, his voice still edged in worry.

"A little." Actually, she still felt pretty bad, but she was too worried about what Arnold might ask to do anything about it.

"So…" she said, looking at the ground.

"So."

They were silent for about a minuet before Arnold finally asked, "What were you doing in there?"

Helga glanced at him for a second, seeing only by the dim glow of the flashlight that had been left on the floor.

"Well, this is it," she thought. "My worst nightmare come true."

"I-I, um…I can't tell you," she whispered.

"Boy, that sounded lame. He'll never let me go with that," she thought in dismay.

"Why not?"

"I just can't."

"Helga, I just found you behind my couch! Don't you think I have a right to know why?!" he shouted at her.

"Yes," she whispered, tears springing to her eyes. "B-but I can't tell." One tear trickled down her cheek.

Arnold was shocked. He hadn't meant to make her cry. "I'm sorry, Helga," he said quickly. "You don't have to tell me if you really don't want to."

"Criminy, why am I crying?" Helga thought, as she desperately tried to stop. "I'm Helga G. Pataki. I don't cry. At least, not in front of anyone. I can't cry in front of anyone. They wouldn't understand. They wouldn't care. Nobody cares." With this thought, she finally gave into her tears. They streamed down her face, as the rain outside fell onto the roof.

"Please don't cry, Helga," Arnold said softly, as he wrapped his arms around her. "Please don't cry."

If this had been under normal circumstances, Helga would have pushed Arnold away and told him not to touch her. She had done it many times before. But these weren't normal circumstances. It was three o'clock in the morning. She was tired and weak and all around miserable. Right now, she didn't care what Arnold thought. Right now, she just wanted him. She rested her head on his shoulder and softly cried. How could she push away the one thing that could comfort her?

"It's okay," Arnold said, stroking her hair. He was too tired to really realize what was going on. For now, he just wanted to make her stop crying. "It's okay."

"No, it's not," she sobbed. "Nobody cares."

"About what?" he asked softly.

"Me. Nobody cares."

He was surprised to hear these words coming from her. He never knew she felt that way. He supposed it made sense. She was constantly saying how much her family hated her. And at school she was basically feared by everyone. Everybody respected her, but no one really liked her. But he never really thought she cared. He had tried to be nice to her before, but she always lashed back at him. It seemed that she liked things the way they were; everyone stayed out of her way, and she'd stay out of theirs. He had never realized how lonely she must feel.

"I care."

"No, nobody cares," she sobbed.

"I do, Helga. I care."

"No, you don't. You hate me."

"I've never said that. I know we've always fought and stuff, but that doesn't mean I don't like you."

"You like me?"

"Of course."

"He likes me," she thought happily. "He really likes me." She continued to cry, but this time for a different reason. This time she was crying for happiness.

Arnold tightened his hold on her. "Of course I like you," he said drowsily. He continued to hold her, stroking her hair, until she stopped crying and her breath became soft and even.

He brushed her hair, damp with tears, out of her face and looked at her. He slowly traced his finger down her cheek.

"Goodnight, Helga," he softly whispered, before he gently kissed her cheek.


	28. The Morning After

**Chapter 28**

**The Morning After**

A large crash of thunder shook Helga from her dreams. Her eyes fluttered open.

"I'm dreaming," she thought in shock. "I'm dreaming. There's no other worldly explanation for this. I'm just having a really good dream is all. I have dreams like this all the time. This is just another dream. There's no reason to worry. This is just a-"

A bright flash of lightning brought her back to her senses.

"Oh, my gosh. I'm not dreaming. I really did just wake up in Arnold's arms. Oh, my gosh." She closed her eyes for a minute or two, allowing the feeling to sink in. "Okay, enough is enough," she thought. "I've got to get out of here before he wakes up."

She glanced at the clock.

"Six thirty-four. I've got time."

She sighed to herself and carefully freed herself from Arnold's grasp.

"Goodbye, my love," she whispered, before bending down and softly kissing his cheek. He moved slightly, and she gasped.

"I've got to control myself if I want to make it out of here in time!" she thought. She gave Arnold one last glance before climbing up his ladder and out the skylight, into the pouring rain.

She was down on the street in the blink of an eye, running through the alleys and roads, barley noticing the water that already came up to her knees and was steadily rising. Only one thought was in her mind: to get home before anyone realized that she'd been gone.

Finally she arrived at her house. She quietly opened the door and slipped inside. She tiptoed up the stairs and into her room. She changed into her nightgown and was in bed before the clock read seven.

* * *

"Helga?" Arnold murmured. He promptly opened his eyes. "Why am I on the couch?" he thought. "Did I sleepwalk or something?" He glanced at the bowl on the floor. "Maybe I was having a snack, and I fell asleep. I bet Grandma's lasagna had some kind of weird spice in it or something. I had the craziest dream. That's the second night in a row I dreamt about Helga, or was it Cecile? Oh, well. It doesn't matter. It was all just a dream."


	29. Monday

**Chapter 29**

**Monday**

Drip. Drip. Drip.

Helga groaned and rolled over. She didn't want to get up. It was Monday morning. Monday meant going to school. Going to school meant having to face Arnold. Facing Arnold meant having to talk about what happened on Saturday night, something that she didn't at all want to discuss.

She had spent most of Sunday locked in her closet, writing poem after poem about the experience. She had filled up an entire volume. She was overjoyed about the whole thing, but she was sure that Arnold wouldn't be. As soon as he saw her, he would start asking questions. Questions that she wouldn't have an answer to. At least, not answers that she wanted him to hear. It was an ordeal that she really didn't want to go through.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

"Criminy! What is that?" Helga wondered out loud, sitting up in bed.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

"Oh, great," she muttered. "Hey, Miriam! My roof's leaking!" she shouted.

"Oh, okay, that's nice, honey," she heard her mother say from downstairs.

"Oh, that's right. Why would you care if the roof over my head is leaking? I'm only your daughter," Helga said sarcastically. She quickly got dressed and went downstairs.

She walked into the living room. The news was on, but there was no one to listen to it.

_"…water rising more than four feet as flood season continues. This is almost as bad as the flood of 1916. Back to you, Tom."_

_"Thanks, Jan. Yes, this is indeed very unusual weather, but I don't think it will be very serious."_

"Not serious?" Helga thought, glancing at the water that came higher than the window and was increasing with every second. "Yeah, that's a laugh."

_"But because of the weather,"_ the news anchor droned on, _"we have a list of school closers."_

"School closers?" Helga was all ears now. "Oh, please say P.S.118. If I don't go to school then I'll have an extra day to prepare myself for what I'm going to say. _Please_ say P.S.118."

_"Okay, here they are. P.S.113, P.S.114, P.S.115…"_

"Come on already! P.S.118!"

_"P.S.116, P.S.117, P.S.118, excuse me, that's P.S.119, not 18, P.S.120, P.S.121-"_

"Stupid weather man!" Helga shouted, turning the TV off.

"Helga?"

Helga screamed and turned around. "Miriam! Don't ever surprise me like that! Ever!"

"Oh, okay. So…what are your plans for today, Helga?"

"I have school, remember?"

"School…? Oh, that's right! School. That's the place where you go to learn things, isn't it?"

"Yes, it is, mom. Aren't you clever."

"So, have you been making good grades?"

"Actually, I flunked a geography exam and forgot all about my science fair project," Helga lied.

"Well, that's good dear. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go…make a smoothie."

"You do that, Miriam."

Helga grabbed a piece of toast and headed out the door.

"Stupid family," she muttered angrily.

She was immediately greeted by water, so high that she almost had to swim to make it to the bus, which she, by a miracle, hadn't missed. The bus doors opened, letting in a stream of water.

"Hurry up, missy, before my whole bus is flooded!" the bus driver snapped.

Helga reluctantly stepped onto the bus. Everyone on the bus was dripping with water. It was pretty funny seeing everyone in such a sorry condition, but Helga was in no mood to laugh. She walked down the aisle slowly, imagining that everyone was staring at her, waiting for her to spill the beans, so they could tease her. But everyone was to busy complaining about the weather or trying to get dry to pay any attention to her. She walked past Arnold, feeling sure that she would faint if he uttered a word, but he didn't even look up. She sat in the seat behind him, next to Phoebe.

"Hey, Pheebs. Some weather, huh?"

"It is rather unusual but highly possible. We have been having a very rainy season. The most likely cause is that the condensing of the rain was not fully absorbed or maybe because the cumulous clouds have held a greater volume…"

Helga droned Phoebe's voice out, as she had learned to do when she began talking about the scientific aspect of things. Instead, she stared at the back of Arnold's head and sighed to herself.

"Oh, Arnold! Bade of my existence, blithe upon my tortured heart! How wonderful you are and yet how mysterious. How come you didn't even glance my way? I mean, I'm rather glad you didn't, but I still expected you to. You found me behind your couch for crying out loud! Are you not even gonna acknowledge that? Are you just going to pretend like nothing happened? Are you too embarrassed to talk about it? Or did you just not see me? Did you even-"

"Helga?"

"Arnold?!" Helga exclaimed, glancing up. "I mean, what do you want, Arnoldo? Can't I have a minute to myself? Sheesh."

"I just thought you might want to know that everyone's already off the bus."

"No, they're…" Helga glanced around. "Well, what do you know. No matter. Outta my way, football head!" she shouted, as she stood up and pushed Arnold aside, stalking past him.

Arnold sighed and followed her out the door, into the flooded street. They both dashed across the street and made it to the steps of the school but not before they had gotten completely drenched.

"Stupid weather," Helga muttered, as she stepped inside the school.

"Yeah, it is."

"I wasn't talking to you, Arnoldo!" she spat, turning to face him. "Quit following me, would ya? What do you want anyway?"

"I'm not following you. I'm just walking to the classroom."

"Oh…right," Helga said, a little disappointed.

"Why doesn't he say anything about what happened?" she thought desperately. "Why won't he even hint at anything?" She looked at him curiously, as though trying to read his mind.

"What?" he asked.

"What's your problem, Arnold?!" she suddenly exclaimed. "How come you won't say anything about what happened?"

"Sorry but…what happened?"

"What happened?! What do you mean, 'what happened'?!"

"Um…listen, Helga. I've gotta get to class so uh, I'll see you around," he said nervously, starting to fear a little for her sanity. "If she keeps going on like this, I'll have a _third_ dream about her tonight," Helga heard him say, as he walked down the hall.

She stood, frozen in the middle of the hallway.

"So, that's it!" she exclaimed. "He thinks it's a dream! He thinks it was all a dream! Oh, Arnold! My poor football headed love god! How unfortunate that you fail to remember our midnight encounter! And yet, maybe it is all for the better if you do not know. Oh, Arnold, why must you always make everything so complicated? Can't you just make everything work out for once? Can't you-"

She suddenly heard that familiar breathing behind her. Without a word she socked Brainy and slunk off to class.


	30. The Flood

**Chapter 30**

**The Flood**

"Where were you, Helga?" Phoebe asked. "Why'd it take you so long to get here?"

"Cause I didn't feel like getting to class with everyone else. Got a problem with that?!"

"No! No problem!" Phoebe said nervously.

"Oh, sorry, Phoebe. I didn't mean to yell. It's just that the world is going tragically wrong today."

"How so, Helga?"

"Well, my roof leaks, and no one cares, our school is the only school that isn't canceled because of the stupid flood-"

"How is that a bad thing?"

"Phoebe, please. Just _pretend _you're normal for once, and you don't like school."

"Right. Pretending!"

"Good. Anyway, then I almost drowned on the way to the bus, now I'm late for class, and to top it all off, we're all gonna die in a heap! The water's gonna rush in, and we're all gonna drowned!"

"Calm down, Helga! No one's going to drowned!"

"Phoebe, have you looked outside lately? The flood's almost ten feet high, and the rain doesn't look like it's letting up anytime soon! Soon it'll be so high that our school is completely covered, and the pressure of the water will crush the walls, and we'll all get hit in the head with bricks and be knocked unconscious, and we'll all die in a heap!"

"Actually, the pressure of pure rain water would most likely not be able to compress the solid brick and plaster walls of our educational facility."

"Huh?"

"We won't die in a heap."

"Really? Well, that's a relief."

"Okay, okay, class, settle down!" Mr. Simmons shouted above the confusion. "Curly, please don't eat the chalk. Alright. I know that you all have had very exciting and 'special' weekends-"

"You have _no _idea," Helga muttered under her breath.

"But now is the time to concentrate on our studies. Now, will everyone please open his or her own 'special' social studies book to page one hundred and sixty four. Stinky, would you read the first paragraph, please?"

"I reckon I could try, Mr. Simmons. Okay. Before the war with Bright Tane-"

"That's Britain."

"Oh, right. Bright Tane had ended, the c-cont-tin, the Continent Congress-"

"Continental Congress."

"Mr. Simmons, I don't think I rightly get this. How come the Continents and the Continentals are having a war that's already been ended? And why doesn't Bright Tane do something about it?"

"Stinky, um…maybe someone else had better read. Lila, would you continue to read where he left off?"

"I'm sure I'd be oh too happy to do so, Mr. Simmons," Lila said, standing up. "Ahem. The Continental Congress decided to set up a national government for the thirteen former colonies. The newly independent states had already started to write their own constitutions -"

"I _really _don't want to sit here and listen to your 'ever so' annoying voice, princess," Helga muttered. "Besides, I don't care what happened to the stupid British people and their lousy colonies. I've got more important things to do." With that, she tore a piece out of a sheet of paper, stuck it in her mouth, chewed it up, and shot it straight at Arnold. Direct hit.

"Cut it out, Helga!" he said, turning around.

"What?" she asked, sounding completely innocent.

Arnold sighed and turned away.

"Ahem!" Lila said, rather loudly. "But leaders believed that the country also needed a-"

"Quit it!" Arnold whispered, after being hit again.

"What are you looking at me for?" Helga spat back.

"Would _some people_," Lila shouted, looking at Helga, "kindly keep it down?" She sighed in frustration and tried to read once more. "Then all thirteen states could act together-"

"Mr. Simmons?" Eugene suddenly asked.

"…as a united nation so-"

"Mr. Simmons?"

"…that they could rule and conquer over-"

"Excuse me, Mr. Simmons?"

"Yes! Eugene, what is it?"

"My feet are wet."

"Okay, Eugene, thank you for that 'special' comment. Lila, you may continue."

"But, Mr. Simmons!"

"WHAT?!"  
"Um…never mind," Eugene said nervously. Instead he leaned over to Sid and whispered, "Really, my feet are wet."

"Boy howdy! My feet are wet too! Hey, Stinky! Are your feet wet?"

"I reckon they are, Sid. What about you, Harold? Are your feet damp as well?"

"No, but they're really, really wet!"

Within five minuets the entire class had lost interest in the lesson and was excitedly talking amongst themselves about the growing puddle of water on the floor.

"Then in 1774, George Washington issued…WILL YOU ALL SHUT UP?!"

Everyone gaped at Lila in astonishment.

"Wilikers, Sid. I reckon I've never seen Miss Lila have any outbursts before."

"I know. And she said 'shut up'. Doesn't she usually say 'please be ever so quiet' or something like that?"

"Yep."

"I-I mean, could you all please be ever so quiet so that I may continue to read our oh to interesting history lesson?"

"Told ya."

"Awe, pipe down, Little Miss Perfect!" Helga shouted above the confusion. "Can't you see that the classroom's being flooded?"

"Oh! Oh, my stars! You're absolutely right, Helga!" Mr. Simmons cried, standing up. "We must all move to higher ground."

"Wow, it took him long enough to catch on," Helga muttered, as she stood up. "Alright, people, listen up! We'll make a pile of desks up to the heating vent, and then we'll all crawl to the roof of the building and-"

"Um, Helga?" Eugene asked.

"What?!"  
"Why don't we just use the door?" he said, as he opened it up. Immediately the entire classroom was covered in three feet high water.

"That's why not."

"Oh."

"Okay, the door's open anyhow, so we might as well use it. Come on, you slobs! Let's get to the classroom on the top floor!"

The class more or less ran out of the classroom and into the hall, kicking and screaming as they went. Suddenly, the front doors of the school blew open from a gust of wind, and an enormous wave of water rushed in.

"Close the door, ya morons!"

Half the class rushed over to the door and managed to pull it shut again. The water was now about four feet high.

"Come on, people, we have to move!" Helga cried, as she attempted to direct everyone to the stairs. "What, do you all want to drown?"

"We're gonna drowned?" Harold asked, confused.

"Harold, incase you haven't already noticed this, people can not breath under water!"

"Really? I always thought that was just a myth."

"Well, it's not, you idiot! If you all don't get up there, then you're gonna die! Got it?!"

"Oh…" Harold said, finally realizing the seriousness of the situation. "Ahhh! Help me! Mommy!" he screamed, as he dashed up the staircase. The rest of the class ran after him.


	31. Everyone Loves Everyone Else

**Chapter 31**

**Everyone Loves Everyone Else**

Lila was about to go up the stairs, when she spotted Arnold. Helga wasn't too far off. Perfect.

"Ahh! Help! Somebody, help me!" she cried, throwing herself into the water. "Help! I'm ever so certain I can't swim!"

"Hang on, Lila!" Arnold exclaimed, jumping at the chance to do something for Lila. "I'll save you!" He quickly ran over, grabbed her hand, and pulled her to the steps. "You okay?"

"Oh, Arnold!" Lila gushed, throwing her arms around his neck, "You saved me! How can I _ever _repay you?"

"It was nothing," he said, as he blushed.

"Thank you just ever so much!" she cried, as she let go of him. She snuck a cruel look at Helga, who was watching in dismay, and then turned back to Arnold.

"So, Lila…now that I saved you and all…do you think that maybe you like me like me?" Arnold asked hopefully.

"I'm ever so sorry, Arnold, but like I've told you again and again, I don't like you like you. I just like you." Then she turned swiftly and marched up the stairs, with a triumphant look on her face. "Ha. That ought to hold them back for a while," she whispered. "Long enough for Arnold to forget all about her."

Arnold sighed and slowly climbed the stairs. Sometimes he wondered why he even attempted chasing after Lila. It was obvious that she wasn't going to give in anytime soon. Why did he even bother?

"Because there's always a chance," he thought to himself. "It might not be for awhile, but someday she may just like me back."

Helga watched him walk up the stairs, tears forming in her eyes. "I don't get it," she muttered. "Why does he even bother chasing after her? Can't he tell that she's just a conniving little villainous who's only intentions are to use him and make him miserable? Can't you get a clue, Arnold? She doesn't like you like you, and she never will!"

Suddenly, the front doors blew open once more, and a mountain of water rushed in. Helga screamed and ran up the steps, but with the doors open, it was only a matter of times before the entire school was filled with water.

She ran up the second and third flights of stairs and then burst through the door of the classroom where everyone was hiding. She slammed the door and turned to everyone, panicked stricken.

"Doors…open," she panted, as she tried to catch her breath. "Water…rising. Fast."

"If my calculations are correct," Phoebe broke in, "then we have approximately twenty three minuets and thirty nine seconds before this room is flooded up to the ceiling."

"Um…then what do we do?" Sid asked.

"Then we…well, unless by some strange miracle we're all rescued, we'll probably end up being submerged under many feet of two parts hydrogen and one part oxygen, allowing the amount of air that our bodies desire to be cut short, so our brain cells will go out one by one, and we will become deceased."

"Huh?"

"We'll drown. We now only have about twenty minuets and five seconds left to live."

"Are you serious?" Rhonda gasped.

"I'm afraid so," Phoebe whispered, one tear slipping down her cheek. "I-"

"Don't cry, Phoebe," Gerald said, as he gently hugged her. "It'll be…well, maybe it won't be okay, but please don't cry. I can't stand to see a pretty girl like you cry."

"Did you hear that?!" Harold exclaimed. "Gerald and Phoebe sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-"

"Harold, just shut up, will you? If I only have a few more minuets to live, then I intend to use them wisely." Then turning back to Phoebe he said, "Phoebe, I love you. Okay? And if any of you people have a problem with that, I don't care." With that, he bent down and shyly kissed Phoebe on the cheek.

"Oooh. Did you see that?!" Harold shouted.

"Who cares?" Curly shouted. "I say he's got a pretty good idea. Hey, Rhonda! I love you!"

"Well, duh! That's no news flash!"

"Yes, but since we only have a few more minuets left to live anyway, could you just say you love me, so I could die in peace?"

"Um…well…Phoebe? You're sure we haven't got much time left?" Rhonda asked uncertainly.

"Hmm?" Phoebe murmured, still dazed by what was going on. "Oh, yeah."

"Well, you better be right, or my social standard will be completely ruined! Alright, Curly, fine. I…um…I guess I kind of…um…okay, whatever. I like you. Happy?"

"HAPPY?! Do pencils eat tomatoes?!"  
"Huh?"

"I'm overjoyed! I'm ecstatic! Will you kiss me?"

"Oh, no. Not again. Don't you even dare!" Rhonda cried, as she ran to the other side of the classroom.

Curly ran after her screaming, "I lost the White House! Where'd it go?"

"I love you Patty!" Harold cried.

"I love you Gloria!" exclaimed Stinky.

"Well, I would say that I love you, Eugene, but you already know that."

"Since when do you love Eugene, Sheena?" asked Sid.

"I told him in second grade."

"Yeah. I always thought it was common knowledge," Eugene said.

"Nadine, I hope I'm not being too forward, but I'm afraid I have a confession to make. I know that you don't know I thing about me, and frankly, I don't know much about you, apart from your unnatural obsession with bugs, but I must tell you that I've fallen madly in love with you!"

"Really, Peapod Kid? Well, that's…interesting."

"Do you have any hidden feelings of desire hidden for me deep within your heart?"

"Um…I'd a know. Maybe. Kind of. Yeah."

"I love you!"

"I love you too!"

"And I love you!"

"And I love you!"

"Ten minuets," Phoebe called out, but everyone was too busy running around telling random people that they loved them to pay any attention to her.


	32. Helga vs Lila

**Chapter 32**

**Helga vs. Lila**

Arnold sighed and walked over to the open window. He looked down into the swirling water, now about thirty feet high.

"Maybe I'll finally get a chance to meet my parents," he thought gloomily. "I can't think like that! There's got to be a way out of here…somehow." Suddenly, his eyes fell upon a jump rope that some prankster had tied to the roof of the building. "I wonder…"

Helga glanced around at her classmates, who were all going crazy, running into each other and shouting 'I love you' to every person who passed them by.

"What morons," she muttered under her breath. "And yet, maybe they have more sense then I do. I mean, sure, half of them don't even know who they're confessing to, but at least they're doing _something_. What am I doing? Nothing." She glanced at Arnold and ran to the opposite corner of the room. She took out her locket and gazed lovingly at it.

"Oh, Arnold! As the seconds of our life tick away, all I can do is hide in a corner. I can't believe myself! I've only got a couple minuets left of my tortured existence; why waist them?"

"Uhh…Helga? I lov-"

"Brainy, shut up," Helga muttered, socking him once again. "Where was I? Oh, yeah. Who cares if Arnold finds out? Who cares if anyone finds out? Who cares about anything? The only thing I care about is Arnold. And if I can't have him in these last few minuets, then my life has been a complete waste." She suddenly stopped, realizing with a shock what she had just said. "Am I mad? Am I actually thinking what I think I'm thinking? There's no _way _I can confess. It's just not possible! I can't! I…don't have much of a choice." She sighed as she stared at her locket. "I guess it's now or never." She put her locket away and glanced up.

"Lila?! What do you want?"

"So. You think you can steal him, don't you?"

"Huh?" Helga said, confused by the question and Lila's completely different tone of speech. What happened to "ever so"?

"Don't play dumb. I know you love Arnold, so you can just stop pretending."

"W-what are you talking about? That's the stupidest thing I ever heard!"

"Oh, please. Don't tell me you don't remember the school play."

"Huh?" Helga said, pretending to be confused.

"Please don't say it, please don't say it," she silently pleaded to herself.

"Romeo and Juliet?"

"Oh, right, that," Helga said. "Y-yeah, so?"

"So? Well, let me refresh your memory for you. A couple months ago, our class was performing the play 'Romeo and Juliet'. Rhonda, Sheena, Phoebe, and I all got chosen to be Juliet and her understudies."

"I was the fourth understudy," Helga reminded her.

"Unfortunately. That was only because you showed up at the last minute because you had just found out that Arnold was playing Romeo."

"So, what? Why would I have cared that he was Romeo?"

"Because there was a kissing scene."

"What? Now you think I want to _kiss _Arnold? That's disgusting! You're out of your mind."

"Yeah, right. I told you, I already know, so you can just stop pretending."

"How on earth would you know any of this? Hypothetically speaking."

"You told me."

"I did not!" Helga lied. She knew exactly what Lila was talking about, of course, but the longer she delayed her, the longer she had before she revealed what she was really planning on doing.

"Yeah, you did. You somehow knocked out all the other Juliets, until I was the only one left. You tried to get me to drop out too, but I wasn't so easily persuaded. Then I asked you if the reason you wanted to be Juliet so badly was because you wanted to kiss Arnold. You denied, of course. So, I said that if that _was_ the reason, I'd let you have the part. Then you told me you loved him. Remember now?"

"Yeah. And do you remember how I said that if you told anyone that I'd strangle you with my bare hands?"

"I never said I'd tell anyone."

"Then what the heck to you want?! I _really _don't want to spend the last minuets of my life talking to you."

"Likewise, I'm sure. I'll make this be over as soon as possible. I just have to make sure you understand that you had better clear outta my territory, if you know what's good for ya."

"Wait. I don't get it. If you want me to stop, then why'd you give me the part?"

"I thought that after you kissed him, you'd confess. Then he would hate you."

"Why would he hate me?" Helga asked worriedly.

"Because he would realize that you were trying to steal him from me, and he'd hate you for getting in my way."

"You're nothing but a self absorbed little phony, aren't you? Can you even hear what you're saying? 'The world revolves around me, and if anyone gets in my way, the world will hate them because everyone loves me so much.'"

"So? It's true. It would have worked out perfectly, except that you didn't confess."

"Well, doi! Why would I do that? Just because I had just kissed him, and I was delirious from happiness, doesn't mean that I'd do anything _that _crazy."

"Go figure."

"And anyway, why would you care? I thought you didn't even like Arnold. If you wanted him so much, why don't you just tell him you like him like him, instead of always saying that you just like him?"

"Because I don't like him like him!"

"Then what the heck are you talking about?! What do you care what I do with Arnold, if you don't even like like him?"

"Because it's all part of my plan! Don't you see? First I have to play hard to get-"

"For months?"

"Just making sure. Anyway, if I play my cards right, and I almost have, then by the time I pretend to tell that I love him, he'll be so completely into me that I'll be able to make him do whatever I want! I'll be in complete control! He'll be my devoted servant! Isn't it brilliant?"

"_Brilliant_?! Are you out of your mind?! I can't believe you! I knew you were evil, but this! What kind of a monster are you? How could you do that to Arnold?"

"Hey, you're the obsessed freak, not me. I don't care what happens to him. I'm just using him."

"Boy, I wish I had a video camera right now. Except that I'd never get to play the tape, since we're all gonna drowned. But it doesn't matter. All I have to do is tell Arnold what you've said, and you'll be ruined!"

"I don't think so," Lila said, smiling cruelly.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"First of all, he'll never believe you."

"He might."

"True, but I've already got that figured out."

"Oh?"

"Yes. I wasn't going to for a couple more weeks, but because of the strange predicament we're in, I'll just have to now. And when I do, there's not a thing you or anyone else…but mostly you, can do about it. He won't believe a word you say."

"I don't get you. What are you gonna do?"

""Confess," Lila said simply, like it was the most common thing in the world.

"B-but you can't!" Helga exclaimed, standing up. "I won't let you! You can't do something like that to Arnold!"

"Oh, really? Who's going to try and stop me?"

"Me. That's who."

Lila laughed. "Yeah, right. What could you possibly do?"

Helga stared at the floor, desperately trying to think of an answer.

"I thought so. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go make a pretend confession." She turned swiftly and started walking toward Arnold.

Without thinking, Helga ran up to Lila and exclaimed, "Not if I confess first!"

"Why, you little!" Lila cried, but Helga was already running past her, through knee high water, trying to make it to Arnold.

"Hey, everybody!" Arnold shouted. "I think I know a way we can escape!"

Everyone was basically too crazy at the moment to hear, or care, what he had to say, but Phoebe, Gerald, and a few other people looked up.

"There's a jump rope tied onto the roof! If we jump, we might be able to reach it and climb to the roof! Then we could-"

"Arnold!" Helga cried, running up to him. "I-I have to tell you something! I lo-"

"Don't listen to her! She's lying! It's a trap!" Lila cried.

"What's going on?" Arnold asked, confused.

"Arnold, you have to listen to me!" Helga exclaimed. "Lila is evil."

"What are you talking abo-"

"Just listen! I know it doesn't make sense, but it's true! She just told me! She has this whole crazy plan to make you her slave or something!"

"Huh?"

"Yeah! And then she's going to say that she loves you, so you'll do everything she says!"

"That's completely crazy!" Lila cried. "Arnold, don't listen to her. The whole drowning experience has gone to her head!"

"Shut up, Lila! There's no way you can win this one, so why even try?"

"Well, the way I see it, there's no way I can lose."

"Yeah, right! Your secret's out, Lila."

"Um…what exactly is going on?" Arnold asked again.

"Your secret's out. And just my luck, Arnoldo still doesn't get it. Didn't you get a word I said, football head?!" Helga screamed at him.

"Not rea-"

"See! I told you! He still doesn't get it. Nothing's changed. He still loves me, he still hates you. Everything's still going in my direction. Face it, Helga. You've lost the battle. There's no way you can beat me!"

"You're not gonna make this easy on me, are you?" Helga asked. Then she turned to Arnold. "Arnold, I've got to tell you something really important, so don't interrupt, and if she says anything, just ignore her."

"Ok, Helga. I'll listen."

"Really? I was kind of hoping you wouldn't."

"Well, if you don't want me to-"

"No, wait! I do!" Helga exclaimed, grasping his hand.

Arnold looked at his hand in surprise. "Well?"

"I…um…-"

"Don't you dare!" Lila screamed. "You'll ruin everything! Absolutely everything!"

Arnold ignored her. "What is it, Helga?" Arnold asked, looking into her eyes. "You can tell me."

Helga smiled slightly. "Ok." She took a deep breath. "Arnold, I…I really, really lo-"

"NOOOOOOO!" Lila screamed. "Get away from him!" she cried, shoving Helga away from Arnold.

Helga stumbled and lost her balance. She fell toward the open window. She frantically grabbed for something, but there was nothing to grab onto.

"ARNOLD!" she screamed, as she plunged through the window, into the deep, swirling water.

Arnold turned to Lila in horror. Then, without thinking, he jumped into the cold, dark water.

Lila turned around. Everyone stared at her, motionless.

"I'm ever so sure I didn't mean for it to go that far!" she told no one in particular. "Honest!"

Everyone continued to stare at her, too shocked to do anything.

"You're nothin' but a dang murderer!" Stinky cried, finally breaking the silence.

"Murderer!" everyone shouted. "Murderer! Murderer! Murderer! Murderer!"


	33. Where is she?

**Chapter 33**

**Where is she?**

Arnold swam up to the surface, gasping for breath.

"Where is she?" he wondered, glancing panickedly every which way. "Where'd she go?"

He ducked back under the water and opened his eyes. The water was so dark that he could hardly see anything. Everything looked the same.

His lungs started to burn. He swam back to the surface and took a deep breath. He scanned the top of the water.

"HELGA!" he screamed.

No answer.

Suddenly, something bumped into him.

"Helga?" he cried, turning around. But it wasn't. It was just a wooden platform. Off of some building that had already caved in under the pressure of the water, no doubt.

Frustrated, he dove back under the water again. This time he swam straight down. The water was over thirty feet deep. She couldn't have made it to the bottom yet. He would get there before her, and then he could find her when she came down.

He swam about twenty feet deep, before running out of breath. He quickly started to swim toward the surface. About halfway there, his hand grazed something. Hoping against hope, he grabbed it. It was a hand.

"Please," he prayed, as he frantically swam to the surface. "Please let it be her."

He burst out of the water, gasping for breath. He looked down. It _was _Helga.

"Thank you," Arnold whispered to no one in particular. He grasped her around the waist and pulled her to the platform. He lifted her onto it and then climbed onto it himself. He glanced at her quickly.

"Okay. She's breathing."

He suddenly was overcome with exhaustion from rescuing her. He lay down next to her and closed his eyes.

"She's alive."


	34. Died and Gone to Heaven

**Chapter 34**

**Died and Gone to Heaven**

"Stupid sun," Helga thought, without bothering to open her eyes. "I wish it would stop shining on me. It feels like it's a hundred degrees." Suddenly, a thought struck her. "What if we already drowned? What if I'm dead? What if I didn't go to Heaven? Maybe that's why I feel like I'm boiling. Criminy! I should have been nicer to Arnold. But it was just to cover up my feelings! It was all for a good cause! This isn't fair."

She slowly opened her eyes. She was blinded for a second by the bright sunlight. She quickly got used to the sun and stared straight ahead. She gasped.

Water.

That was all she could see. Clear, blue water, stretching out to the horizon.

"Never mind," she thought. "This is Heaven after all. Just a bunch of water. Just the ocean. Nice and peaceful. I'll just stay here for all eternity." She closed her eyes again. "Wait a minute! If we all drowned, then Arnold must be here too! I've got to find him! We're dead anyway. I have an eternity to spend with him. He might as well know my secret. I've waited long enough as is. Besides, this is Heaven. I'm supposed to be completely happy, right? And there's no way I can be happy without him. Okay, that's it. I'm going to find him right now."

She slowly sat up.

"Weird. Why a stupid wooden raft? I kind of expected a cloud or something. No bother. I don't care about the scenery. I just care about Arnold. Now to find him."

She turned around.

"Wow. That was fast." She sighed lovingly. "He's so cute when he sleeps."

Arnold was coming to. He sat up, facing away from her. "Man, what a night!" he said, as he opened his eyes. "Uh oh." He glanced around. Water as far as the eye could see. "This can't be good."

He remembered the reason he was here in the first place.

"Helga!" he thought. "Uh oh. What if she didn't live? What if I was so tired I only thought I saw her breathing? What if she's lying there, right now, dead? I couldn't live with myself! Oh, why was I so stupid? Why didn't I check to make sure she was truly alive? What if she wasn't dead yet, but she was suffocating, and I didn't do anything? I could have saved her! Oh, it's all my fault!" He slowly turned around, expecting the worst.

"Helga!" he exclaimed. "You're alive!"

Without thinking why, he leaned over and hugged her tightly. He waited for her to shove him away, but she just hugged him back.

"Wow. I guess she's just happy that I saved her life. I'm glad. Maybe she'll actually be nice for once."

"I was right," Helga thought dreamily, enjoying every second of Arnold's embrace, "this is Heaven. Wait a minute. Did he say I was alive? Does he not know what happened? Does he not know where we are? Hmm…I guess I'll have to tell him myself."

"Arnold, I have to tell you something," she said out loud.

"Oh, that's right!" he said, letting go of her. "That thing you were gonna tell me yesterday."

"Well…that too. But there's something you have to know first. Do you um, remember what happened yesterday?"

"Of course. There was a flood. The school was flooding. We only had a few minutes left to live. Then you and Lila got in some sort of fight. You were trying to tell me something, and she wouldn't let you. She pushed you, and you fell out the window."

"Oh, yeah!" Helga exclaimed. "Lila killed me! Of all the rotten luck."

"_Killed _you? What are you talking about?"

"That's what I'm trying to tell you. Arnold…we're in Heaven."

"I wouldn't really call being stranded on a raft Heaven."

"No, really. Heaven. As in, we're dead. We drowned, remember?"

"No, we didn't!"

"Yes, we did! Lila pushed me out the window. Everything went black. The next thing you know, I'm here. I'm in the middle of the ocean. I'm peacefully drifting in the middle of nowhere. Everything's perfect. It must be Heaven."

"No! You've got it all wrong. This isn't Heaven. We're not dead. You just don't know what happened."

"Arnold, stop being in denial."

"Helga, I'm serious. We're not dead, and this is not Heaven. I mean, if this was Heaven, do you really think you'd be with me? I would think your perfect world would be miles away from me."

"Um…actually…"

"Really, Helga. You didn't drown. I thought you did, but you didn't. You fell into the water-"

"I didn't fall. I was pushed."

"You can't blame Lila for that. She was just angry is all. I'm sure she didn't mean for you to actually fall."

"I don't get it, Arnold. I just don't get it. All this, and you still don't see what she's really like. Arnold, she murdered me for cryin' out loud!"

"She didn't murder you! You didn't die!"

"Then why are we here? How do you explain all this?" she asked, gesturing to the ocean.

"After you fell in the water, I jumped in and saved you."

"W-what?"

"I saved you! It was hard too. It took forever to find you. I thought I was too late. I thought _I _was going to drowned. But I found you. I found you and put you on this raft. Then I guess I fell asleep. Now we're here."

"Oh. So we didn't die."

"No, of course not," he said smiling.


	35. Conversation

**Chapter 35**

**Conversation**

"Wow. I feel like I've been brought back from the dead," Helga said in a daze.

Arnold laughed. "Okay, now that we've established the fact that we're not dead, what was the other thing you wanted to tell me?"

"Oh…that," Helga said nervously, rubbing her arm.

"Criminy! I wish I was dead," she thought, "then I could have told him, and we would have lived in happiness for all eternity. What rotten luck. There's no way I can tell him now."

"Well?" he asked, getting more curious with every second that she stalled.

"It's…not important right now."

"How could it not be important?! It seemed pretty important yesterday."

"Yeah…"

"So, what is it?"

Helga stared at the raft, purposely avoiding eye contact with him.

"Are you going to tell me, or am I going to have to guess?"

She laughed slightly. "How come you always do that Arnold?"

"Do what?"

"You always…I don't know. Ask me unanswerable questions. Make me fell guilty when I won't tell you. Don't you see? I can't tell you. I-"

She stopped herself just in time. She was being way too honest with him.

"I'd better snap out of it, or I'll let something important slip out," she thought.

"Just…forget I said anything," she told Arnold after a few seconds.

"So, you won't tell me?"

"I can't," she said quietly.

Arnold was suddenly struck with the fact that this was almost exactly what she had said when he found her behind his couch.

"That was a dream!" he scolded himself. "It never happened. This is just a coincidence."

"Thanks."

"What?" Arnold asked, still lost in thought.

"Thanks. You know, for saving me. If it wasn't for you, I'd probably be dead now."

"It was nothing."

"That's what you said when Wolfgang tried to beat me up," Helga said, laughing.

"Oh, yeah. I guess it is."

"That's the second time you've risked your life for me."

"Well, you keep getting into life risking situations."

"Hey, it's not my fault bucko!"

"Okay, you're right."

"But how come you keep saving me? I mean, no one else bothered to rescue me when _Lila pushed me _in the water. I doubt anyone else even noticed."

"That's because they were all running around trying to kiss everyone else."

She had to laugh at that. "What morons! I'm glad you weren't that stupid. Hey, wait, why weren't you chasing Lila?"

"Why would I want to waste the few precious moments of my life chasing a girl that won't even give me a chance?"

"You mean you don't like her like her anymore?" Helga gasped, her heart skipping a beat.

"Well, no, I still like her. Like her. I just wouldn't want to waste my life chasing her."

"Oh, Lila, if only you could hear this now," Helga thought delightedly.

"I totally agree," she said out loud. "I think you should just forget about her. You guys have never seemed to really get along. I don't think she's really your type."

"You're just mad that she pushed you. Besides, why would you care what I do about Lila?"

"Oh, I-I don't. I was just…you know…giving advice."

"I thought that was _my_ job."

"Alright then, Einstein, I've got one for you. Where are we, and how on earth do we get back? Got any brilliant advice for that?"

"Well…there were streets going to the left, right, and front, so-"

"So, we could have taken anyone of them."

"Right. Do you know what direction the beach is from Hillwood City?"

"How would I know?"

"I know you've been there. Do you remember?"

"What, going or the direction?"

"Both."

"Well, of course I remember going. I don't remember what I did, but I remember that I went. I was only six. All I remember is sitting in a chair watching Olga play with some stupid dolphins. But I haven't the slightest idea what _direction _the beach was in. I doubt I even knew what directions were."

"Aren't you forgetting something?"

"What?" she asked, knowing exactly what he was going to say.

"What about this spring break? You were on the beach, remember?"

"Yeah…" she said uneasily, "but…we really don't have to talk about that. I-I mean, the whole thing was just sort of…crazy."

"Well, it was a little crazy toward the end," he said, blushing slightly, "but actually I had a pretty good time."

"Yeah. With Summer."

"She was okay…but you were right. She did turn out to be evil. It was after you showed me what she was really like that I _really _started to have a good time."

"I tried to show you before, but you wouldn't listen."

"I thought that you were just trying to bug me."

"Why would I do that?"

"Because you always do that. You always bug me at school and just about everywhere else, so why would that have been any different?"

"Because that time I was telling the truth! For awhile I was just trying to bug you, but then I heard Summer talking with her boyfriend, and I heard her whole plan. I was just trying to warn you, but you wouldn't even give me a chance."

"Well, can you blame me? You had never really been nice before, so I just kind of assumed that it was all a trick. But that was wrong of me. I should have trusted you. You were telling the truth the whole time. I guess you were just…I don't know…trying to be my friend or something."

"Don't be ridiculous, hair boy! Why would I ever want to be your friend?"

"Then why'd you help me?"

"Well…you know. I just…didn't want Summer to take advantage of you is all."

"Why?"

"B-because…I just didn't. I-I mean, I couldn't just let you be used like that, when I knew what she was trying to do. And besides, I would have felt guilty if I hadn't told you, and that would have wrecked my vacation."

Arnold sighed. "Whatever you say, Helga."

"That's right Arnoldo, whatever _I _say!" Helga shouted, turning away. She stared at the horizon in silence.

"I'm stranded on a raft, in the middle of the ocean, miles away from civilization, with Arnold," she thought to herself. "You'd think I could at least be a _little _nice to him. I mean, I'm all alone with him on a stinkin' raft! I've drempt of things like this happening, but this is _not _going how I planned. If it was, we'd probably be making out by now. But _no_, I'm just staring at nothing, saying nothing, doing nothing-"

"Thanks."

Helga screamed and turned around. "Don't _ever _surprise me like that!" she shouted angrily.

"Oh. Sorry."

"Thanks for what, anyway? I didn't do anything."

"I was just thinking, I never really did thank you for what you did at the beach."

"Oh. Um…you're welcome, I guess."

Arnold stared at her for a while and then said, "You know what Helga? You're really weird."

"Oh, gee, thanks a million," she said sarcastically.

"No, I mean in a good way. Like, you're always mean, and then out of the blue you'll do something nice. I don't get it. Why can't you just be nice all the time? Why do you always have to pretend to be mean?"

"What do you mean 'pretend'? I've never been nice!" she defended herself. "I'm bad. Pure bad. I always have been, and I always will be. Got it?"

"You're not really bad. I've seen you being nice too many times to think otherwise."

"But I am-"

"Just stop it Helga!" Arnold suddenly shouted at her, grasping her shoulders. "I know you're not this bad! You might act like it for reasons unknown, but I know that deep down you're a nice, caring person with a kinder, gentler side. And if I have to be stuck with you on this thing, then I want you to start showing it!"

Helga stared at him in shock. "I…" She stopped. She didn't know what to say. She glanced at the floor, unable to meet his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Helga," Arnold said after a moment, letting go of her shoulders. "I don't know what got into me. It's just this stupid situation. It's got me acting crazy."

Helga continued to stare at the floor, wanting desperately to talk to him but afraid of what he might say.

"Just pretend I didn't say anything, okay?" Arnold asked her.

She looked up. "I don't have to do anything that you or anyone else tells me to Arnoldo, got it? I'll be bad when I want, I'll be good when I want. And that's not often, so don't get used to it."

Suddenly, he started to laugh.

"What's so funny?"

"I was just thinking. Remember how mad Summer was when we won the sandcastle competition?"

Helga laughed too. "That was pretty off topic, football head. But of course she was mad! I had just ruined her beautiful scheme! I had just wrecked her chance to be on Babewatch! Served her right, the conniving little witch."

"I know. I can't believe she pretended to like me like me, just so I could build her a sandcastle that would win the competition."

"It's no wonder she wanted you to do it. Did you see what she and Sandy 'built'? It wasn't a sandcastle. It was just a hill and a bunch of stupid holes. They never had a chance!"

"I know. Especially considering the fact that they couldn't seem to do anything except throw sand at each other."

"I bet Summer dumped him like a sack of potatoes. I know I would have. Why a girl would go for him, I'll never know."

"I doubt she even liked him. It seemed like all she wanted was some random guy to be her partner on Babewatch."

"I heard him say that he just wanted to be a manager or something. Talk about lame. I bet he didn't even watch the show."

"Well…neither do I."

"Doi! It's a girl's show! You're not supposed to watch it! I don't get why. The world would probably be a better place if everyone watched it. I've seen almost every episode."

"I haven't seen any…except for the one that we were in. I've got that on tape."

"Whoopdeedo. We were only in it for what, a full five minutes?"

"Yeah, but still, being on TV is a once in a lifetime opportunity."

"Oh, please. When they said the prize was 'an appearance on Babewatch', don't you think they should have meant _a full episode_? I mean, what did we even do? You're drowning, they save you, I…" She trailed off, stopping herself before she told him anymore

"Criminy, how come we're talking about this?" she thought desperately. "I've got to change the subject or something, and fast!"


	36. Where are we?

**Chapter 36**

**Where are we?**

"Um…yeah. So, where were we again?" Helga said.

"You were talking about what happened when we were on the show."

"NO! I-I mean…where _are we_ are we. Like, in the world?"

"Well, since we don't know what direction the beach is in, it's safe to assume that we either floated down the street to the left, right, or front, so-"

"_So_, we could be just about anywhere.  
"Well…yeah."

"Oh, this is great. Just great."

"We live in Washington-"

"Way to state the obvious.

Arnold glared at her. "So the closest ocean would be the Pacific.

"Atlantic."

"How could it be the Atlantic? That's on the other side of the United States!"

"Maybe we floated around Canada." Helga knew perfectly well that Arnold was right, but she could never surpass a chance to argue with him.

"But wouldn't we have to go through the Artic Ocean to do that?"

"How should I know? Maybe we went through the Panama Canal."

"How long would that take?"

"Criminy, Arnold, what do you think I am, an encyclopedia?!" she snapped at him.

"Sorry. Look, I really don't want to start fighting with you. Can we just say we're in the Pacific Ocean?"

"We could just as easily say we're in the Atlantic."

"Yeah, but what if it takes years to get to the Panama Canal?"

"If it did, they wouldn't have invented it."

"Still, we're in the Pacific."

"Atlantic."

"Pacific."

"Atlantic!"

"Pacific!"

"Atlantic!"

"Pacific!"

"Pacific!"

"Atlantic!"

"Pacific!"

"Indian!"

"_Indian_?"

"It could happen."

"Oh, sure. And microscopic aliens could be building an advanced civilization inside my nose," Helga said, as she rolled her eyes.

"Hey, at least I'm trying to think of something."

"You're not trying anything! You're sitting on a stupid raft, in the middle of absolutely _nowhere_, making up solutions that aren't even going to work!"

"How come you always have to be so mean, Helga? Can't you just _try_ to be nice for once in your life?"

"Let's not start that again! I'm having the worst day of my entire life! I'm stranded on a raft, in the middle of the ocean, with a dopey football head!"

"If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't be alive, remember?"

"Oh, what, now I'm supposed to act all nice and sweet to you, like you're my hero or something?!"

"No, but you could at least stop yelling at me!"

"I'm _not _yelling!" she screamed.

"Yes, you are!"

"Well, you would be too if you were stuck in the ocean with your arch nemesis!"

"What, and you think I enjoy having you as company? Believe it or not, you're not exactly my favorite person either. In fact, I'd rather be stuck out here with practically anyone, other than you! Especially Lila-"

"Don't you _dare _bring her into this, football head!" she screamed, close to tears.

"Why not? What do you have against her anyway?"

"Everything!"

"You know, if you can't say something nice, you shouldn't say anything at all!"

"Fine! I won't! I'll never say another word to you again! Goodbye!" With that, she turned around, folded her arms, and stared out at the

sunset. She reached into her pocket and pulled out one of her many poetry books and her purple pen. The book was almost identical to the one Arnold had, but the cover was a slightly different shade of pink. She opened it up, and began to write.


	37. On My Own

**Chapter 37**

**On My Own**

_On my own,_

_pretending he's beside me._

_All alone,_

_I walk with him till morning._

_Without him,_

_I feel his arms around me,_

_and when I lose my way I close my eyes, and he has found me._

_In the rain,_

_the pavement shines like silver._

_All the lights_

_are misty in the river._

_In the darkness,_

_the trees are full of starlight,_

_and all I see is him and me forever and forever._

_And I know,_

_it's only in my mind._

_That I'm talking to myself_

_and not to him._

_And although_

_I know that he is blind,_

_still I say_

_there's a way for us._

_I love him, but everyday I'm learning_

_all my life, I've only been pretending._

_Without me, his world would go on turning._

_The world is full of happiness that I have never known!_

_I love him._

_I love him._

_I love him, but only_

_on my own._

_I love him, but everyday I'm finding_

_not much longer can I keep in hiding._

_If I do, his world will go on turning._

_I've got to make my move soon, or I'll be left all alone!_

_So, my love, at last, at last, I'll tell you._

_I'll confess undying love that's so true_

_that you'll see that I'm the only one,_

_and when you do, it's me and you, forever and forever._

_I love you._

_I love you._

_I'll love you, forever_

_and ever._

"Oh, sure, I'll confess," she thought sarcastically. "I'm sure he'll take it _really _well. Especially considering the fact that he hates me."

She put her book back in her pocket and stared out at the setting sun.

"Stupid sunset," she thought. "How dare it make everything so beautiful when I'm in such a depressed spirit. Who was I kidding? Arnold has never liked me, and he never will. He'll never think of me as any more than 'that girl who bugs him'. He said so himself. He'd rather be stuck here with anyone but me. Oh, what a cursed, wretched existence I live. He'll never love me."

"But he loves Cecile," said a little voice in the back of her head. "And he loves his secret admirer."

"Stupid Cecile. So what if he loves Cecile? Cecile was nice and sweet and not at all like me at all. He's in love with a disguise, not me. He'd never love me just for who I am. He'd drop Cecile faster than lightning if he knew she was me. He hates me. He absolutely hates me."

She started to cry, very softly.

"Oh, criminy, what's my problem? Do I really want Arnold to hear me?" she thought.

She turned around to look. He was lying down, facing away from her. He appeared to be asleep.

She lay down next to him, facing the other way so that he wouldn't see her cry.

"Oh, Arnold, why would you love me?" she wondered. "You're right, I am always mean. But I can't help it! I have to be mean! It's the only way I can cover up my true feelings. Can't you see that, Arnold? I may act tough, but it's all for the sake of love! I have to act the way I do. I have to pretend to hate you. My whole life has to be a secret. Whenever I ever do anything with you, I always have to have a disguise or a reasonable excuse. I mean, I've kissed you twice, and both times were in a stupid script! I just weaseled my into playing Juliet in the school play, and on Babewatch…well ok, maybe that wasn't necessarily in the script, but you don't have to know that."


	38. Summer Love

**Chapter 38**

**Summer Love**

Helga's thoughts began to drift back to what had happened on that fateful trip, what she couldn't discuss with Arnold.

* * *

_It had all happened on spring break. Helga had gone to the beach with her family, who couldn't seem to do anything but complain. She hadn't really been looking forward to this vacation, especially considering the fact that she would be away from her beloved Arnold for a whole week. But all that soon changed._

_It turned out that Arnold was staying at the same beach. In fact, he was staying in the same beach house. She made up her mind to be nice to him, but she never got the chance. Summer had come._

_She was just going over to Arnold to put her plan into action, but she was too late. He was talking to an annoyingly beautiful girl, who kept going on and on about how wonderful Arnold was with sand. She had only been gone for two minutes, and already someone was moving in on _her _territory! She promised herself that Arnold was going to be hers' this vacation, and that nobody, _especially _not this girl, was going to stand in her way._

_She had stopped at nothing to try to pry the two apart. She followed them all day, making their life a living nightmare. She was thoroughly enjoying the progress she was making, until Arnold caught her in the act._

_He told her to stop been mean to him and Summer for no good reason and to stay out of their way. For awhile she had planned to do just that. After all, neither one of them had done anything wrong. She was just jealous. She had no reason to wreck Arnold's relationship with Summer, just because she hated anyone who was a threat to any chance of a relationship _she _might get. _

_But all that changed when she overheard Summer talking with her boyfriend, Sandy. It turned out that she was just using Arnold to build her a sandcastle that would win a competition. The prize was to be on Babewatch._

_Helga had to do something. There was no way that this trampy little surfer girl was going to take away Arnold _and _a chance to be on her favorite show._

_She had tried her hardest to get Arnold to listen to her. She had even resorted to going to his window in the middle of the night, begging that he would at least try to believe her. She told him everything she had overheard, but he thought it was all just another one of her tricks. She kept trying to tell him numerous other times but to no avail. He wouldn't believe her._

_The day of the sandcastle competition had arrived. Arnold had been waiting for Summer, but Helga had spotted her first. _And _she was with Sandy. _

_Helga ran over to Arnold, took hold of his arm, and dragged him over to where Summer and Sandy were. They hid behind some bushes and spied on Summer while she discussed her entire plan. Arnold dumped Summer before she even knew what was happening. To Helga, it was revenge of the sweetest kind._

_Arnold had said that he was sorry for not listening to her. She was so happy that she had started to tell him why she had helped him in the first place but had stopped herself before she gave anything important away. He smiled at her almost knowingly, and for a second she was going to tell him everything. But then she had quickly snapped out of it and pretended to be all business. She had told him that they still had a sandcastle competition to win, and to her surprise, he had seemed rather eager to do it._

_They had worked beautifully together. They built a humungous castle with towers, and turrets, and bridges, and a moat, and even a drawbridge. Sandy and Summer had still entered to contest, but they had been too busy throwing wet sand at one another to get anything accomplished. Helga and Arnold had won, hands down._

_The next day they had made their "big appearance" on Babewatch. Arnold was the drowning victim, pretending to die in the ocean. Helga stood with two other life guards. She was wearing the trademark swimsuit, even thought her's was too big._

_The cameras turned on. The male lifeguard swam out to sea and expertly hauled Arnold to shore. Then the female lifeguard bent down to resuscitate him._

_Helga didn't know what had happened, but the next thing she knew she was shoving the lifeguard out of the way muttering, "Move over Barbie, _I've _got this one." Without thinking what she was doing, she kneeled down next to Arnold. He opened his eyes in shock as she leaned closer to him. She could tell he didn't want her to, but she didn't care. She had worked long enough to get him away from Summer. It was time for her reward. _

_She closed her eyes and put her lips to his. She felt him stiffen in her grasp, but she only kissed him harder. _

_"This is even better than I expected," she thought happily. "Okay, sure, he's horrified, but he had better get used to it! This is the highlight of my vacation, and nothing is going to ruin it. Actually…this is the highlight of my entire life."_

_She opened one eye a little and met his stare. Then something happened. She didn't know what or why, but she suddenly knew that he was enjoying this as much as she was._

_She could faintly hear the director screaming "Cut!" in the background, but he must have shut up eventually because the cameras kept on rolling. She kissed him for ten seconds and would have kept going if that stupid stagehand hadn't come over and threatened to pull her off of him. Sure, she was getting a little carried away by that point, but did he _really _have to do that? _

_Helga sat up to break the kiss, but then something happened that she never would have imagined in a million years. Arnold didn't let her. He sat up with her and continued to kiss her for a few seconds. Then she pulled away, mainly because she was so shocked._

_She stood in the sand, blushing like crazy, still not able to believe what she had done. Arnold had gotten up shakily and looked at her in mock surprise, but she refused to meet his eyes._

_When the director announced that their scene was over, and they could go, she had run out of there like the demons of the fiery underworld had been released. She hadn't looked back until she had made it back to the beach house._

_The next day she had gone home, and she didn't see Arnold until two days later when they went back to school. He hadn't said a thing about it, but he looked at her in a way that clearly said that they should both just keep quiet and pretend it never happened. So, that's what she did. She never mentioned it again, at least, not until today._

_

* * *

_

"But it doesn't even matter that I mentioned it," Helga thought gloomily, "because you'll never love me back." Her tears came faster and stronger now, and she desperately hoped that Arnold was sound asleep and couldn't hear here. But she was wrong.

Arnold was half asleep, but he was still aware of her crying.

"I hope I wasn't too hard on her," he thought. "I didn't mean to make her cry. I just…I don't know what. I'm too tired to think about it now. I'll worry about it tomorrow," he thought, as he dropped off to sleep.


	39. Seaweed Madness

**Chapter 39**

**Seaweed Madness**

"Helga, wake up. Helga!" Arnold said, as he gently shook her.

She slowly opened her eyes.

"Arnold," she sighed dreamily. She suddenly remembered where she was. "Hey, who said you could touch me?" she snapped, shoving him away.

"Oh. Sorry."

"Well? What do you want? I was sound asleep, you know," Helga said irritably.

"Sorry."

"What time is it anyway?" she asked, looking at the sun, which was high in the sky.

"I don't know. Do you have a watch?"

"No, Arnold, I don't have a watch. Did you wake me up just to talk about watches?"

"No. I wanted to know if you had any food."

"Oh, sure. I have half a banquet stuffed in my back pocket," she said sarcastically.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I'm really hungry."

"No, duh. We had nothing to eat yesterday."  
"Well, then, what should we eat?"

"I don't know. Go jump in the water and catch a fish or something."

"I couldn't catch a fish barehanded. We would need some kind of string, like on a fishing pole."

"Where are we gonna get string, football head?"

"I don't know. Do you have any?"

"Yeah, a whole bunch. It's keeping the banquet company in my back pocket."

"Maybe we could use…" Arnold glanced around the raft. "Could we use your bow? If you untie it, we could-"

"NO WAY!" she screamed. "No, sir! Out of the question!"

"Why not?"

"Cause…cause it's my most prized possession, and I don't want to dunk it in the ocean. I might lose it."

"You really like it that much?"

"Doi! Why do you think I've worn it everyday since I was three?"

"I don't know. Why?"

"Uh oh," she thought. "Don't want to go there!"

"Yeah, well, how come you always wear that stupid blue hat?" she asked.

"My parents gave it to me. It's kind of the only thing I have to remember them by."

"Yeah, well, same thing with my bow. It's got…sentimental value and junk like that."

"Okay, if it really means that much to you. But what are we going to eat?"

"I don't care. You think of something."

"I'm not going to do all the work! You think of something!" Arnold shot back at her.

"Why should I? I don't care if you go hungry."

"Helga, we got into this mess together, and we have to work together if we're going to survive."

"W-well…what do you expect me to do? I mean, look around! There's no food!"

"Um…" Arnold glanced into the water. "How about this?" He reached in and pulled out a mass of seaweed that was floating near the surface.

"What the heck is it? It looks dead."

"It's seaweed."

"It's dead."

"It's a plant."

"You expect me to eat it?"

"What else are we supposed to do?"

"We could turn cannibal…" She looked at the shocked look on his face and laughed. "Just joking. But really, I'm not going to eat that."

"Fine then. I don't care if you go hungry."

Helga felt a twinge of guilt, but quickly pushed it away. "Oh, yeah, great comeback Arnoldo. You can't even make up your own insults! You have to copy off me. Pathetic."

"Yeah, well…"

"Like I said. You can't think of one. Best not to try to beat me at my own game, football head."

"Whatever you say, Helga."

"Exactly! Now stop talking, and go get some real food."

"Seaweed is real food."

"No, it's not."

"Sure it is. Lot's of people eat it in Japan."

"Great. When we get to Japan, I'll eat it."

"We're not going to Japan."

"What, do you have some sort of a destination in mind?"

"I don't know. Shouldn't we just try to get back home?"

"How are we gonna do that, hair boy? The current's pushing us in the opposite direction, and besides, we're already hundreds of miles away."

"I guess you're right. But since we're probably not going to go anywhere with decent food anytime soon, I'm going to eat the seaweed." He picked up a piece and put it in his mouth.

"So? How is it?"

"Salty."

"Doi! It was in the ocean, Einstein."

"I know that, Helga."

"So, um…is it edible?"

"Yeah. It's actually not that bad."

Helga picked up a piece. "This is so against my better judgement." She closed her eyes and put it in her mouth. "Hmm…you're right. It's not too bad. I wouldn't want to eat it everyday, but it's okay."

"Great, now we won't starve."

"Aren't you optimistic. Oh, well. Bon appetit."

He stared at her in shock. "What did you say?"

"What? Aren't you optimistic?"

"No, after that."

"I don't know! Why would you care?"

"For a second I thought you sounded like someone I once knew."

"Who?"

"This French girl. Her name was Cecile. Well, actually, I don't know what he name really was. She never told me."

"O-oh really? Well…um…that's interesting."

"Yeah." He was silent for a moment. "Forget I said anything."

"Uh, okay." She took another bite of seaweed. "This stuff is getting really old really fast."

"If I could just use your bow-"

"NO! Just shut up about it!"

They ate in silence.


	40. I like your bow

**Chapter 40**

**I like your bow…**

"Oh, Arnold, my love," Helga thought to herself, sneaking a fleeting look at him. "If only I could tell you why my bow means so much to me. If only I could tell you everything. If only you could know that from the first moment I ever laid eyes on you I've been head over heels in love! Ever since that day…"

* * *

_She thought back to that blessed day. The day actually hadn't started off so good. She was three years old, and it was her first day of preschool. She was late and becoming later every minute, all because no one would take her to school. No, both her parents were to busy listening to Olga play the piano to care about her._

_She finally got fed up and decided to walk herself to school. It was pouring rain outside, and she was soon soaked. She walked through dark, forbidding allies, trying desperately to find her way. She almost got kidnapped, got attacked by a dog, and got splashed by a bus, before she finally made it to Urban Tots Preschool._

_She was standing in the rain, splattered with mud and close to tears, when suddenly someone put an umbrella over her head. She looked up in surprise, and was staring into a pair of emerald green eyes. It was love at first sight._

_"Hi. Nice bow."_

_He liked her bow? She blinked in surprise. That was the first time anyone had ever said anything nice to her. She couldn't think of anything to say, so she just muttered, "Huh?"_

_"I like your bow, cause it's pink like your pants."_

_He walked her to the door and then walked inside. She pressed her face to the glass and stared longingly after him_

_She watched him all day, and he watched her. They stole glances at each other across the room when no one was looking. For a few beautiful hours, it had been true. Arnold had loved her._

_But it didn't last long. It was snack time. She was too busy staring at Arnold and readjusting her bow to notice when Harold reached over and stole her graham crackers. She was about to cry, and Arnold noticed. He walked over to her table and handed her his graham crackers._

_"Want mine?"_

_She slowly nodded and took them. _

_He turned to walk back to his table, but then he turned around and shyly waved at her. She sighed happily and waved back. Then suddenly, she heard laughter behind her._

_She turned around and saw all her classmates pointing and laughing at her. Harold mockingly copied her sigh and continued laughing. Helga looked at Arnold, and he stared back with a worried expression on his face. _

_Suddenly, she knocked Harold down and shoved her fists in his face._

_"You better shut up pink boy, or I'll have to introduce you to…to Old Betsy and…and the Five Avengers!"_

_"Old who and the five what?"_

_"My fists, stupid! That's their names!"_

_"Your fists have names? Awe, you're confusing me!"_

_Helga jumped on his stomach, and then turned to the rest of the class._

_"And you all had better keep outta my way, or you'll have to face the wrath of Helga G. Pataki!"_

_Arnold looked at her in shock, wondering where the sweet shy girl he had known just a few minutes ago had gone. But it was too late. Helga G. Pataki, the bully, was born._

_So that was it. Her new reputation as a bully just kind of stuck. No one even remembered what had happened that day at preschool, probably not even Arnold. But it didn't matter. For one, brief, amazing moment he had really, truly loved her. That was enough._

_

* * *

_

"But what would have happened," Helga wondered, "if I hadn't sighed? If I had just said thanks or something? Then no one would have laughed, and I wouldn't have had to defend myself, and I still would be all sweet and junk like I used to be, and Arnold-oh Arnold! Arnold would have still loved me and would still love me now, and everything would be perfect. Absolutely perfect." She quickly shook her head and snapped back to reality. "I've got to stop thinking about what might have been! It doesn't matter now. It's in the past, and nothing I do is going to change it." She sighed and looked out at the setting sun. "But still…"


	41. Together forever?

**Chapter 41**

**Together…forever?**

"Helga?"

"STOP DOING THAT!" she screamed. "Quit startling me, will you?"

"Sorry, Helga. I never mean to. You just get scared too easily."

"I do not! I don't get scared of anything! You don't scare me, you just startle me! There's a difference. I'm not scared of anything, except…"

"Except what?"

"Why should I tell you?" she snapped at him.

"Okay, okay, sorry I ask-"

"Well, if you _really _must know, I'm terrified of…rats." She shuddered as she said it.

"Rats?"

"Don't say it! Even the name gives me the creeps!"

"What's so bad about…that thing?"

"They're disgusting! Little, sharp, yellow teeth, long tails, black, beady eyes, filthy fir, rabies carrying, finger eati-"

"I think I get the point. But you know, Helga, all creatures have some good in them, and you shouldn't judge-"

"Don't give me one of your little speeches on honesty and morals, football head! Rats are disgusting. Period. If I ever saw one face to face, I bet I'd faint."

"You're in luck. We're stranded on a raft in the middle of the ocean. No rats."

She laughed and leaned against him, laying her head on his shoulder.

"Um, Helga?"

"Don't think I'm getting all weird and mushy or anything like that, football head, I'm just…tired," she lied. "You know, the whole experience is exhausting and stuff."

"Right. The sun's going down anyway. We should probably sleep soon."

"I'm sick of sleeping on this stupid raft! I wish we'd hurry up and get to wherever we're going."

"Me too." Arnold sighed. "It's beautiful."

"What, the raft?"

"The sunset. Don't you think?"

"Y-yeah, it's beautiful. I mean, if you like that sort of thing."

They sat in silence for a couple minutes, just staring out at the setting sun.

"Arnold?"

"Hmm?"

"How long, I mean, do you think we're ever gonna get home again? Or anywhere?"

"I don't know."

"I mean, are we gonna spend the rest of our lives on this raft?"

"Of course not…"

"How would you know?"

"Well…I don't. I guess there is a very real chance that we'll never get off this raft."

"How much of a chance?"

"Probably fifty-fifty. But I don't know. I'm not Phoebe."

"Phoebe's probably dead," Helga whispered. "I-I guess they all are."

"Well…maybe they escaped."

"Arnold, I know you always try to look on the bright side, but there comes a time when you have to face reality. There's no way they could have survived. There was just too much water."

"You're probably right. I guess…I guess we're pretty lucky to even be alive. So, even if we have to spend the rest of our lives together on this raft, I guess it wouldn't be so bad. It's better than being dead, anyway."

Helga was shocked. He didn't think that it would be bad to _spend the rest of his life with her_?

"Y-yeah, well, I guess it wouldn't be _too _bad," she said uncertainly. "But…that doesn't mean I'd actually _like _it or anything."

"If Grandpa were here right now, I bet he'd be saying 'I told you so'," Arnold said out loud but almost to himself.

"Why?"

"Oh, it's stupid really. He just told me this crazy story once, and its moral apparently was that you and I should get married. And now, here we are, on a raft in the middle of nowhere. We'll probably never see another human as long as we live. So…well…you know…"

Helga gasped, her hope rising. "Is that a proposal?"

Arnold laughed. "You know what Helga? You're okay. You can be mean, but you're also funny. And _sometimes _you're nice."

"Oh." She laughed nervously. "Right. Funny."

"Phew," she sighed to herself. "He thinks it was just a joke. I've got to be more careful about what I say!"

"Besides," she said out loud, "I'm not ever gonna get married. That's disgusting! And I'd _especially _never marry a dopey football head like you."

"Look at the sky," Arnold said, not really catching what she had just said.

"Yeah? So?"

"Look how cloudy it is. And so fast."

"Oh, great. Now not only am I going to be tired and hungry, I'm gonna be all wet."

A large clap of thunder sounded directly overhead, and lightning lit up the sky. The wind began to blow in all directions, making little waves in the water.

"Isn't there a name for storms in the ocean? Salami or something?"

"I don't know. If you bother to pay attention to Mr. Simmons, then you're even stupider than I thought," Helga told him.

"I remember him saying something," Arnold said, ignoring her last comment. "I don't remember what it was exactly, but I think he said that these places were destroyed because of these storms in the water."

"So? What your point?"

"The point is, that if there's a storm out here, and it looks like there's going to be one, then it might be one of those tunami things."

"And?"

"And if it _is _one of those, then we could be in big trouble."

"What, are you afraid of a little water?" Helga asked teasingly.

"No, but-"

"Oh, no! It's water! I'm gonna die!" she cried dramatically. "Goodbye, cruel world!" she exclaimed. She threw up her arms in mock despair and fell backwards into Arnold's arms. "I'm dead."

He laughed. "I'll throw you a nice funeral then."

Helga folded her arms across her chest. "Don't get so cozy, football head," she snapped, sitting up.

"_Me_? But you…oh, never mind."

Suddenly, lightning flashed across the sky.

"That's it, I'm going to bed. At least that way I'll be able to die peacefully in my sleep, instead of suffering."

"Helga, I really doubt we're gonna die."

"What if the water's struck by lightning, and we get electrified? And what about your younomi theory?"

"It was just a guess. It'll probably just be a little storm. Maybe it won't even rain."

As if on cue, the sky opened up, and buckets of water poured down in great torrents.

"Oh, yeah. Nice going, Arnoldo."

"What, now you're mad at me because it's raining?"

"Why not? It's not like I've got anyone else to be mad at."

"How about you try not to be mad at all?"

"Listen, Arnold, you better shut up about that, or I'll push you overboard."

"About what?"

"I said shut up! I'm going to sleep, and if you wake me up this time, I'll introduce you to Old Betsy and…" She yawned sleepily and lay down. "And the Five Avengers." She closed her eyes.

Arnold sighed. "Goodnight, Helga."


	42. Tsunami

**Chapter 42**

**Tsunami**

"Miriam, fix the stupid leak," Helga muttered, half asleep. Another wave of water crashed down on her. She opened her eyes slowly.

The ocean was jet black. The cloudy sky barley let the moon shine dimly through. Rain poured down in heavy streaks, never ceasing for an instant. Thunder and lightning echoed across the dark sky. Tall, menacing waves rose up all around. The raft was tossed about in the water like a rag doll.

Helga sat up. "Arnold!" she cried.

He was lying down, grasping the sides of the raft.

"Get down and hold on!" he shouted above the wind.

"Why?"

"Just do it!"

A strong gust of wind knocked her down. She grabbed onto the side of the raft with one hand and grabbed Arnold's hand with the other.

"What in the name of criminy is going on here?!"

"I think it's a tsunami!"

"I think it's a really bad storm!"

Suddenly, a four foot high wave rose up and slammed down on them. Helga screamed and clenched Arnold's hand even tighter.

He was actually kind of glad. He was scared too.

"We're all gonna die!" Helga screamed. "We're gonna drowned and sink to the bottom of the ocean, and piranhas will feast on out flesh, and-"

"No, we're not! Just hang on!"

The waves flung the raft every which way. It got pulled underwater, but it always managed to rise back up to the surface. They struggled for a few hours, and the storm just grew stronger.

"Arnold, we're not gonna make it! The waves are too big!"

"Yes, we are! We have to! We…" He trailed off, looking in horror at a humongous black object in the distance.

Helga looked at him curiously and followed his line of eyesight, until she saw the fifteenth foot tidal wave that was coming towards them with alarming speed and growing larger.

"Oh…my…" She screamed at the top of her lungs and squeezed Arnold's hand as hard as she could.

"Ow! Not so tight!"

"What are we going to do?!" she screamed, ignoring his protests.

"We'll go over the wave! Then we'll come down the other side!"

"Are you nuts?! That's a twenty something foot drop off!"

"It's better than being crushed!"

"How do you know we'll go over?!"

"I don't! We'll just have to hope that we do!"

"Hoping doesn't do anything Arnold! I've been hoping for years, and it never happens!"

"What never happens?"

"Um, well, ya see…"

"Tell me later! First we've got to make it over the wave!"

The enormous wave stood just a few feet in front of them.

"But I have to tell you now! I might not get another chance!"

"No time! Listen Helga, no matter what happens, don't let go of my hand!"

"Why?"

"We can't be separated, even for an instant! There's a much better chance of surviving if there's two of us!"

"How come?"

"I have no idea! Plus, I'm really scared, and I don't want to die alone!"

"_You're _scared?! I'm completely freaking out!"

"I thought you weren't scared of anything except rats!"

"Forget what I said! Killer waves scare me too!"

The giant wave loomed right in front of them. It began to tip forward under its own weight.

Helga screamed. Arnold grabbed her and pulled her against him. She was too scared to push him away. She wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him as tight as she could. He hugged her back. Helga closed her eyes and waited for death.

Suddenly, by some miracle, the wave started to upright itself. It was still wavering, but it was clear that it wasn't going to tip over.

"We're gonna make it Helga!" Arnold cried.

The wave started to pull the raft upward, higher and higher.

"We're gonna die, we're gonna die, we're gonna die-"

"No, we're not Helga! We're going over the wave, just like we planned!"

"We can't drop that far!" she cried, her eyes still tightly closed.

"It's not that far…only about twenty feet."

"I hope you're kidding."

"We'll soon find out. We're almost at the top."

Helga stifled a gasp. "Arnold, don't let go of me!"

He nervously laughed. "Is that the least of your worries?"

"Just don't! Promise me you won't let go! I-I don't want to die alone!"

"I promise, Helga," he said solemnly.

The raft teetered at the top of the wave. Helga slowly opened her eyes and peered over the edge of the raft. The water looked like it was one hundred feet below them; a huge asphalt road, ready to destroy them upon impact.

Helga screamed. "Arnold, it's gonna kill us-"

"No, it's n-"

"Shut up! Arnold, I-I have to tell you something. I…um…I-"

The wave suddenly lurched violently forward, dropping the raft.

Helga screamed and hugged Arnold so tight he thought she was going to suffocate him.

"ARNOLD, I LOV-"

The raft hit the water. Her head smacked against the wooden boards. Everything went black.


	43. Land

**Chapter 43**

**Land**

"Cecile? Where are you? Ceci-"

Arnold suddenly stopped. His eyes snapped open. He was immediately blinded by the sun shining directly above him. Once he had adjusted to the sudden brightness, he looked around. He could see palm trees and tropical flowers growing father up the hill that he was lying on; beyond that was an immense looking jungle. Colorful birds flew through the air. A gentle wave washed up by his feet. Everything was beautiful, but he could care less about his surroundings. He only had one thought in his head. Land.

He jumped up. He was on a sandy beach. Splintered pieces of their broken raft lay scattered next to some boulders the jutted out of the ground near the water's edge. They must have crashed on the rocks, but he didn't remember. He didn't remember anything after the raft fell back into the water. But that didn't matter. The important thing was that they survived, and now they were on dry land. Boy, wouldn't Helga be surprised…

"Helga!" he gasped. He had been so excited that he had forgotten about her. He glanced around. Where was she? She wouldn't have gone into the forest without him, would she? Maybe she was just farther along on the beach.

"ARNOLD!"

"Good guess," he thought.

"Helga?" he shouted. "Where are you?"

"Here! I'm right here!"

Arnold followed the direction her voice was coming from. He saw someone coming. He stopped and stared. It was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. She was slowly coming toward him, with a smile on her face. Her long golden hair flowed out from behind her. She was wearing a sparkly hot-pink dress with spaghetti straps. She had sapphire blue eyes that seemed to reach into the depths of her soul. And she was wearing a pink bow. He really liked that bow. It was pink like her dress…

"ARNOLD! Hey, Arnold! Earth to football head! Anybody home?"

Arnold snapped out of his daydream but continued to stare at Helga.

"What are you looking at, football head?" she spat at him.

"Oh…nothing." He shook his head. "I just thought I saw something."

"What?"

"Nothing. Just a trick of the light."

"Maybe the crash messed up your eyes or something."

"The crash! I almost forgot! Actually, I did forget. I don't remember anything after we fell," Arnold admitted.

"Me neither. I just assumed from the sorry condition of the raft that we had crashed."

"Yeah, but that's a good thing. I thought I'd never see dry land again!"

Helga looked around, taking in the surroundings for the first time.

"Wow. Talk about lucky. We've landed on some sort of paradise island!"

"It's amazing, isn't it? It's surprising that no one's discovered it by now. I say it would make a pretty cool resort."

"I'll say." Helga thought about it for a moment. "Hey, wait a minute. How do we know it's _not _a resort? Maybe we're just one the wrong side of the island! I bet you anything that there's some fancy hotel thing on the other side."

"Helga, you're a genius! Why didn't I think of that?"

"Cause you have paste for brains," Helga said matter-of-factly.

Arnold glared at her. "Look, we made it this far because we worked together. And if we want to keep going, we're gonna have to keep working together. I'm willing to be nice if you are. What do you say?" He held out his hand.

"I-I say…I say you're a weird headed freak who doesn't know what he's talking about! We never 'worked together'. Maybe in your perfect little world, but not mine! It doesn't matter how many times you start talking about peace and harmony and whatnot because it's never gonna happen! Got it?"

"Fine then, I'll just go to the other side of the island without you."

"Oh, what, and leave me here to suffer?"

"I'll send someone for you when I get there."

"Fine! I'll just let you do all the work for me! You can go traipsing through the jungle! See if I care! I'm gonna stay right here." She sat down and crossed her arms to emphasize her point.

"Right. See ya," he said, without too much enthusiasm.

"But if I never _did _have to see you again, I can't say I'd be complaining," he thought to himself, as he walked into the forest.

* * *

He had only been gone five minutes, and Helga was already regretting that she hadn't gone with him.

What had she been thinking? How could she have let him leave her like that? What was she supposed to do now? Just wait? What if he didn't make it back? What if there wasn't even a resort? What if he was in trouble? What if he was, right now, lying somewhere in the forest, dying? Oh, how could she have been so stupid?

"I've got to find him!" she exclaimed.

She got up and walked to the edge of the forest.

"Criminy!" she said out loud, walking in a few feet, "How am I ever gonna find him in this stupid maze?" She started to walk anyway, heading deeper and deeper into the forest.


	44. Lost

**Chapter 44**

**Lost**

Somewhere in the thick of the jungle, Arnold was in much the same predicament.

"Didn't I already pass that tree?" he wondered. "Or maybe not. Everything looks the same!" He turned around, looking in all directions. Miles of plants stretched out in front of him. "This is hopeless! I never should have left Helga. How stupid was I, thinking I could find the resort by myself? There probably isn't a resort anyway. We'll probably both just die on this island, and no one would ever know. Oh, well, the least I can do is try to make it back to Helga. But which way is the beach?" He looked around helplessly. "Ennie mennie miney moe…"

* * *

Something rustled in the bushes. Helga swiftly turned around. Nothing was there. She started to walk faster, jumping at every noise.

"Who am I kidding?" she thought with despair. "I'll never find Arnold! This jungle's too confusing! I bet Arnold's lost too. Maybe we'll both keep walking in circles until we die from-"

At twig snapped.

"Until we die from fear of being stalked by…some jungle thing!"

She started to run through the forest, trying desperately to escape all the strange noises.

* * *

Arnold peered through the leaves of the trees at the sky. It was getting dark, and he still had no idea where he was or where he was going.

"How am I gonna find my way through the woods when it's dark? Besides, don't all the most dangerous predators come out at night?"

He started to walk faster and then broke into a run.

* * *

Helga tour through the woods, everything flashing past in a blinding whirl of color. Whatever was following her was getting closer. She was tired of running, but she had to keep going. She had to escape it. She could hear footsteps pounding on the earth. Now _two _of them were chasing her! She dashed around a tree and-


	45. Agreement

**Chapter 45**

**Agreement **

WHAM!

Helga collided with something hard and fell backwards. She sat up quickly, fearing the worst.

"Arnold?!" she gasped in surprise.

"Helga? Wow! I've been looking everywhere for you! I couldn't find my way back to the beach."

"The beach? Whatever happened to the resort?"

"I gave up. I doubt there's a resort here anyway. There would have been _some _kind of civilization if there was one. But there's nothing."

"So…what now? We're trapped on a deserted island thousands of miles away from human life, being stalked by some psychopathic creep?"  
"What psychopathic creep?" Arnold asked, confused.

"There's something following me! It's been following me this whole time!"

"I don't see anything."

"Doi! You think it would just come out in the open? 'Oh, hi, I'm a homicidal freak, who's gonna follow you around until it's the right time to strike! But don't worry about me, just go around doing whatever you normally do, and I'll keep out of your way.'"

"I think your imagination's just running away with you."

"Yeah, right! Believe it or not, football head, I _do _have ears, and they _do _work. I know what I heard!"

"What did you hear?"

"Things moving around. Twigs breaking, leaves rustling, junk like that."

"Did it ever cross your mind that maybe it's just an animal?"

Helga stopped for a second. "No…"

"Then again, I wouldn't want an animal following me either," Arnold said uncertainly.

"Exactly! I hate this whole stupid jungle! It's giving me the creeps! I should have just stayed on the beach."  
"Why didn't you?"

"Because I was worried something might have happened to you!" Helga blurted out.

"You were worried about me?"

"Um…" She stared at the ground and softly whispered, "Yes."

"But…I thought you hated me. Why were you worried?"

Helga looked him straight in the eye. "Listen Arnold, I _do _hate you, got it?" Her voice sounded like she wasn't too supportive of what she had said.

"Then why were you worried?

"B-because…because, I-I don't know. I guess cause I just couldn't really survive out here by myself," she said, shrugging.

"Sure you could-"

"No, I couldn't! I-I need you. I have no clue why, but if I were on my own on this stupid island, I think I'd go insane."

"Then why didn't you just go with me in the first place?"

"You wouldn't let me."

"You didn't ask."

"I didn't think you'd want me to come."

"Well…I didn't. But I would have let you."

"I wouldn't want to be there if I wasn't wanted," Helga said, crossing her arms.

"It was just because I was mad at you…"

"That's no surprise. You're always mad at me."

"That's cause you're always making me mad!" Arnold shouted. He saw a hurt look pass over her face and immediately regretted what he had said. "Look, Helga, I'm sorry. I never should have left you in the first place. You're right, we do need to stay together to make it through this. Let's just promise each other that from now on there's gonna be no more running away. From now on we're gonna stick together. Okay?"

Helga shrugged. "Whatever floats your boat, football head."


	46. Perfect Scenery

**Chapter 46**

**Perfect Scenery**

Arnold smiled, happy that they had at last reached some kind of agreement.

"What are you so happy about? Don't forget, we're still stuck on a deserted island with some murderous 'thing'."

"I still think it's an animal."

"Great, then we're being stalked be a murderous animal."

"Animals don't stalk people."

"Then what the heck's been following me?!"

Arnold sighed. He could tell this was getting nowhere. "Look, if you're so scared, why don't we sleep in a tree? Then whatever's been following you couldn't get us."

"Oh, gee, Arnoldo, that's just brilliant, except for just one little thing. Couldn't it just climb the stinkin' tree?!"

"Yeah, but at least it'd be harder for them."

Helga was about to throw some other insult at him, but she suddenly stopped herself.

"_Arnold and Helga sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G_," sang a little voice in the back of her head.

"Awe, what the heck?" she thought to herself. "What have I got to lose?"

"Well, maybe you're right, Arnold," she said out loud. "Maybe we should sleep in a tree. You know, for um…safety and stuff."

"Okay. Now we have to find a tree."

"I don't care which one. Just make it really high."

"Like a palm tree?"

"Yeah, we're gonna spend the night miraculously floating in the air next to a palm tree," she said sarcastically.

"Huh?"

"Palm trees don't have branches!"

"Oh, yeah. Well, then, let's just go in some regular tree, like an oak or something."

"No, I'm gonna find something good."

"After all," she thought, "if this is gonna be romantic, it should have perfect scenery."

She looked around.

"Eureka! Arnold, I found it!" She grabbed him by the arm and led him over to the tree.

It looked like some sort of a tropical weeping willow. Its long silky leaves hung down like a curtain around the tree, making a sort of room inside. The leaves were intertwined with little pink flowers.

Arnold looked at it with amazement. "Wow. That is good."

"Told ya. Now we just have to…" She looked at the tree. She hadn't noticed how high it was.

"Get up there," Arnold finished for her.

The trunk was too wide to climb, and the branches were too high to jump to.

"Now would be a really good time for some of your brilliant advice, Arnold!"

"Well…maybe we could just climb up a vine."

"What if it doesn't hold?"

"I think it will," he said, but he looked at it doubtfully. "Ladies first."

"Yeah, right. I'm not gonna be the first and then find out that the vine isn't strong enough. You go first."

"If I die, it's your fault."

"I'm quivering with fear," she said sarcastically.

Arnold grabbed onto the vine and started to climb. He was almost to the top, when the vine snapped! He grabbed onto a branch and hung on for dear life.

"Don't let go, Arnold!" Helga shouted. "Get on the branch!"

He struggled to pull himself onto the branch and finally managed to do so. "I'm okay," he called down to her.

"You sound like Eugene," Helga joked, but inside her heard was beating a million miles an hour. He could have died!

"Calm down, Helga, he's okay," she thought to herself.

"Do you think you can jump up?" Arnold asked.

"Are you nuts?! I can't jump that high!"

"Try to jump up and grab my hand so I can pull you up."

"I already told you, I can't jump that high!"

"Just try." He held his hand down for her.

Helga jumped and missed.

"Told ya."

"Try again. Unless you want the stalker to get you."

She took a running leap and jumped. This time she grabbed his hand.

"What are you waiting for, hair boy? Pull me up before I fall!"

Arnold grabbed onto her other hand and pulled her up into his lap.

"Good job, Arnold, you almost dropped…me…" She trailed off, realizing with wonder how close they were.

"Helga…"

Her heart skipped a beat. The way he said her name was so…different. So full of love.

She shifted her gaze upward and looked into his eyes.

"Yes, Arnold…" she breathed, leaning closer.

"Could you get off me?"

"What?! Oh…sorry," she said, her voice filled with disappointment, which he failed to notice.

"I can't believe I was so stupid!" she thought, as she climbed off him and onto the branch. "I've got to control my imagination! I can't believe I really thought he said my name in a 'certain' way. Criminy, I'm losing my mind! I'm a basket case!"

She turned to look at Arnold. He was staring off into space and seemed to be lost in thought. She made sure he wasn't looking and then reached into her pocket and pulled out her poetry book. She opened it up.

"Wow! The ink hardly faded at all, even after going underwater!" she thought. She took out her purple pen. "'Waterproof'," she read on the side. "Well, that explains a lot." She leaned against the trunk of the tree and began to write.


	47. Is it hopeless?

**Chapter 47**

**Is it hopeless?**

_Handsome._

_Tender._

_Soft._

_Why do you look right through me_

_thinking_

'_No'?_

_I can't deny my feelings_

_growing_

_strong._

_I try to keep believing,_

_dreaming_

_on._

_And every time I see you_

_I crave_

_more._

_I wanna pull you closer_

_closer_

_closer_

_closer,_

_but you leave me feeling frozen._

_I can be_

_all you need._

_Won't you please_

_stay with me?_

_Apologies, might-have-beens._

_Can't erase what I feel._

_Choking_

_back_

_emotion._

_I try to keep on hoping _

_for a _

_way._

_A reason for us both to _

_come in_

_close._

_I long for you to hold me _

_like I_

_dream you would._

_And since my dream is growing_

_ever_

_stronger,_

_I wanna be the object_

_object_

_object_

_object_

_of your passion._

_But is it hopeless?_

"What are you writing?"

Helga nearly fell out of the tree.

"Stop doing that!"

"Sorry. But what are you writing?"

She slammed the book shut. "None of your business!"

"Could I guess?"

"No."

"Is it homework?"

"What homework could that _possibly _be?"

"You're right. Um…is it a drawing?"

"No."

"Story?"

"No."

"Oh, I know what it is! It's poetry! You told me you wrote poetry before, remember?"

Helga was speechless.

"Ha! It is poetry, isn't it?"

"O-okay, yeah, so what if I write poetry? You got a problem with that?"

"No. I think it's kind of cool."

"Oh…"

"Could I read it?"

"NO! NEVER!"

"Why not?"

"You wouldn't understand."

"Sure I would."

"No, you wouldn't. You'd probably just laugh."

"Try me."

For a second Helga half considered letting him, but she quickly changed her mind.

"No! You can't read it!"

"Please?"

"No!"

"Fine."

Helga looked away, embarrassed that they were arguing about her _poetry _of all things.

"I wish I _could _show you my poetry," she thought, "and I wish you _could _understand the depth of it. Not as just a 'hobby' but as a desperate attempt to express my obsessive passion for you, even if it is only to myself. Oh, Arnold, my love, if only I could come out and say how madly in love I am with you, and if only you felt the same way! If only I would stop hiding the real me; hiding the truth. If only I could somehow obtain the courage to right now just reach over and grab you and kiss you and-"

She had half a mind to do just that, until Arnold suddenly reached over and grabbed her poetry book.

"Don't you dare!" she screamed, but he had already started reading the poem she had just written. She was going to snatch the book back, but for some reason she didn't. Perhaps today was the day. Perhaps today he would finally know.

Helga watched him with anticipation until he stopped reading.

"That's really good. Who'd you write it for?"

This wasn't the kind of response she had been expecting.

"Huh?"

"Who was the poem written for?"

"What do you mean?" she asked, obviously confused. Didn't he know it was about him?

"Which boy? Is he in our class?"

"Criminy! I didn't put his name in that poem, did I?" she thought with a mixture of relief and disappointment. "No matter. I'll just play dumb. He won't find out."

"Uh, it's no one," she lied. "I just thought it up."

"Yeah, right. It must have been about someone. It was too…deep for it to be about no one."

"Well, it wasn't about anyone, got it? I'd never like a boy. That's disgusting!"

Helga having a crush on someone was a little strange, he'd admit it, but he had proof that she did. She had told him.


	48. You deserve it

**Chapter 48**

**You deserve it…**

"What about Golden Hero? Or…who you wanted him to be anyway."

"Oh, no, not that again," Helga thought.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about," she said uneasily.

"You know, 'Golden Hero'? The person who kept emailing you all those love letters? Who turned out to be Brainy?"

"Oh, _him_. Well, what, you think I love Brainy?" Helga asked, laughing at the absurdity of the thought.

"No. I think you love _someone_, and you thought it was Golden Hero was him, but it was Brainy."

Helga was silent.

"And I know it's true too because you told me."

"I _did_?"

"See, you admitted it," Arnold said proudly, pleased that he finally had the upper hand.

"Fine, fine, fine, but I never _told _you!"

"Not right out, but I figured it out."

"Oh…" she said slowly, realization dawning on her.

"Maybe he's losing his denseness," she thought.

"Okay, so what?" Helga finally said. "So I like a guy, is that a crime?"

"Who is it?"

"Like I'd tell," she said harshly, snatching her book back.

"Just wondering."

"Well, don't! Just…forget this ever happened."

"I'm not Phoebe. You can't tell me what to do."

"I have my ways," Helga said menacingly, holding up her fist.

"Okay, okay, I get your point."

Helga turned away, still shocked that he had figured out so much.

"Okay, so now he knows that he has a secret admirer who writes books of obsessive poetry about him in little pink books. _And _he knows that I have a little pink book that I write obsessive poetry in! Criminy, can he not put two and two together? It's only a matter of time now before he figures everything out. Or until I snap and tell him everything myself!" she thought with dismay. "I guess he always knew I liked _someone _he just doesn't know _who_. It's pretty weird that he didn't figure it out though. I practically handed him my secret…"

She started to think about it, and the more she thought about it, the stranger it became that he didn't figure it out. Sure, it hadn't been a real 'confession', but it had been pretty darn close…

* * *

_It had been a couple months ago. It was a normal, boring school day until this sixth grade beauty and third grade nerd walked in. They started talking about how all the kids were going to be getting email files or something. Helga wasn't exactly paying attention to what they were saying. She was paying attention to Arnold paying attention to the sixth grader, Mary Margaret._

_After school, she logged onto her computer with her new screen name 'Helgoth'. There was already a message for her. She read it in amazement._

To: Helgoth

From: GoldenHero

Subject: I Dream of a Brilliant Love

Dear Helga,

I have been silent, but now at

last I can speak-by E-mail-and

tell you of my love. Helga, you

inspire me as I roam among

fantastic shadows, as I sit behind

you on the bus, and as I pick

strands of rubber off my sneakers

like you pick strands of love from

my wounded heart.

I wait for you, sweet Helga,

among the softly rustling stars.

Golden Hero

_Helga read the letter again, but she had no clue who had sent it. Obviously someone in her class, otherwise they wouldn't have known her screen name, but who? She had to find out._

To: GoldenHero

From: Helgoth

Subject: Your Anonymous Note

Okay, Golden Hero, what exactly

are you getting at? And more to

the point: WHO ARE YOU? The only

kind of story I hate more than a romance is a mystery.

_She clicked the send button, and almost immediately a message popped up. Did this guy have nothing better to do than sit by his computer, waiting for her to write back?_

To: Helgoth

From: GoldenHero

Subject: My Anonymous Note

Dear Helga,

Thank you so much for your reply.

I am lashed by the furious tides

of love, dancing like a cork on

the waves, held up only by hope.

As to your question: Who am I? It

doesn't matter. My name is but a

pale piece of driftwood on the

fitful sea.

What does matter is you. I know

all about you. I know about the

locket you carry. I know about the

shrine you have in your locker. I

know about the desperate love you

harbor in your misunderstood heart,

and I CARE.

Please don't let me drown in this

fermenting swamp of unspoken love.

Take my hand before I sink.

Golden Hero

_Helga almost fainted. How on _earth _could he know? Nobody knew! Nobody! And yet, he did. But how? How could he know of her secret love for that football headed, tiny-blue-hatted, golden-haired…_

_"Wait a minute. Golden haired? Golden Hero?" She gasped, realizing the wonderful truth. "It's Arnold! My golden hero!"_

_She emailed Phoebe about the whole thing, and Phoebe didn't believe her. She said she wanted to do some 'investigating' to figure out who he really was, but Helga wouldn't let her. Too risky._

_The next day Helga logged onto her computer and sent a letter back to Arnold._

To: GoldenHero

From: Helgoth

Subject: US!

Dearest Golden Hero,

You have made me so happy! I

think I've always known that one

day you would find me, but I

must confess I came close to despair at

times. And now we have truly found

each other at last!

Yet I think we must meet for our

joy to be complete. Think of it!

Each of us so very shy, so modest,

so insecure, yet we will be able

to gaze into each others eyes at

last and know the truth that is

our beautiful love.

I shall always be grateful

to this electronic medium that

allowed you to emerge from your

shy, retiring shell, but-enough

already. Let us meet for real!

Devotedly yours,

Helga

P.S. Carry a red rose when we

meet so I shall know it is thee!

_The next day Helga received Arnold's letter, saying that he accepted. She hugged herself tightly and screamed at the top of her lungs._

_"Helga? Are you okay?" her mother called from downstairs._

_"I'm FINE, Miriam! I'm great! I'm ecstatic!"_

_She couldn't believe it! Arnold was actually going to meet her on Saturday! He even promised to carry the red rose! Everything was perfect. Absolutely perfect._

_That Saturday she was forty-five minutes early, but she didn't care. She waited for him at the corner on Ninth Street and Washington. She couldn't wait for him to come, and yet she wished he never would. This was her big moment of truth with Arnold. WHAT THE HECK WAS SHE GOING TO DO?_

_"Just do it," she thought to herself. "Let whatever happens happen. Don't hold anything back. Tell him everything." She was suddenly struck by a horrible thought. "What if it's not Arnold? I really don't have any proof that it is… But it has to be him! Who else could it possibly be?"_

_Suddenly she saw him across the street. So it _was _him!_

_She smiled at him as he walked up._

_"Oh, how I have hoped and prayed for this moment! This is the best day of my life, thanks to you, Arnold! Oh, how do I tell thee? How do I convey the depth of my lo-"_

_Suddenly she stopped. She heard a familiar raspy breath over her right shoulder. Didn't it just figure that Brainy would show up at her big confession? Oh, well. She delivered her usual reflexive back punch, which knocked him cold._

_"Where was I? Oh yeah-"_

_"Helga, you're here to meet Golden Hero, right?" Arnold interrupted, a little uneasily. Helga sure wasn't acting like herself. And why did she just punch the guy she loved? _

_"Oh, yes!" Helga breathed, leaning closer to him. "Speaking of Golden Hero, where's your red rose?" she asked coyly._

_"Okay, now she's _really _not acting like herself," Arnold thought, getting a little scared. "What does she mean, _my _red rose? Maybe she's just so excited she doesn't know what she's talking about. Yeah, that's it. She means _Brainy's _red rose, not mine."_

_Arnold pointed behind her. She turned to look and saw Brainy, clutching a red rose._

_She screamed and turned to Arnold._

_"Is this your idea of a JOKE? Well, I hope you got a big kick out of it…" Tears sprung to her eyes. "You sure got me good, football head!" She shoved him out of the way and ran down the street._

_How could she have been so stupid? How could she have let herself believe it was Arnold? She should have let Phoebe investigate it. How many more heartbreaks could she take?_

_The next day at school Helga tried to avoid Arnold as much as possible, but as fate would have it, she couldn't stay that way long._

_She turned the corner and suddenly crashed into Arnold._

_"Watch it!" she shouted._

_"Helga."_

_"Keep your eye on the road, football head!" she said irritably, standing up._

_"Look, Helga, I'm glad we, uh, ran into each other. I wanted to talk to you."_

_"About what? New ways to humiliate me?"_

_"Helga-I want to apologize for that whole thing. It really wasn't meant to hurt you. I'm really sorry that you were disappointed about who Golden Hero turned out to be."_

_"Just forget about it, okay?" she snapped. _

_"Oh, what the heck. If he's trying to apologize, the least I can do is play along," she thought._

_She turned to Arnold and sighed. "Look…I guess you weren't setting me up. Let's pretend the whole thing never happened."_

_"Sure, Helga. I'll never mention a word of it to anyone."_

_"Good," she said, smiling a little._

_"Helga?"_

_"What?"_

_"I just want to say-I know how it feels to be disappointed like that."_

_"He must be talking about Mary Margaret," she thought, but decided to keep quite about it._

_"You do?"_

_"Yeah. I feel really dumb because I hoped someone liked me who didn't even know I existed. Look, I'm sorry Golden Hero wasn't who you wanted him to be. I just hope that whoever the guy is-the one you wished Golden Hero was-well, I hope he does find you someday. You deserve it."_

_Helga looked at him in amazement. "He thinks I _deserve _him?" she thought with delight. "Why? I don't even care. The point is, he does." She was so touched she nearly swooned, but she quickly recovered._

_"Yeah, maybe someday. In his _dreams_!" Then she turned around and ran down the street._

_"Oh Arnold, my golden hero! I do deserve you, and someday you will be mine! Someday…"_


	49. Sitting in a tree

**Chapter 49**

**Sitting in a tree…**

The sun shone brightly through the trees. A gentle breeze blew through the forest. A bird chirped loudly, its shrill call breaking the still air. Arnold and Helga opened their eyes at the same time.

"Good morning, Helga," Arnold said sleepily.

"What's so good about it?" she snapped back. Suddenly she cried out in surprise. She was in Arnold's arms. Any passerby would have thought that they were in a heated embrace. His arms were draped around her shoulders, and her head was resting on his chest.

Helga closed her eyes tightly and then opened them again, but it was no dream.

"Arnold, what the heck is going on here?!"

"What?" he asked, still half asleep.

"What in the name of criminy are you doing?!"  
"Trying to wake up."

Helga lifted her head and stared at him in shock. "Is that all you've got to say for yourself?!"

"What are you talking about?" Arnold asked. He opened his eyes all the way.

"Whoa. Okay, _that's _what she's talking about," he thought. "What _is _going on?"

"Well?" Helga asked impatiently.

"I've never been this close to a girl before," Arnold thought in half amazement, half shock. "So, why am I? And with _Helga _of all people? What the heck _am _I doing?"

"Are you just gonna stare at me all day?"

"What? No, I…"

"Aren't you gonna say something?"

"I don't know what to say."

"How about an explanation?"

"Well…I'd give you one…if I had one," Arnold said hesitantly.

"And what is that supposed to mean?"

"That I'm just as surprised as you are?" he asked uncertainly, not knowing what her reaction would be.

Helga stared at him, stunned. "You mean, you have no idea why we're…like this?"

"Not unless you do."

"Hey, don't look at me! I didn't have anything to do with it!"

"At least, I don't _think _I did," she thought worriedly. "I thought I just fell asleep! I don't remember any of this happening…but I'm sure glad it did!"

"This is just too weird," Arnold said, interrupting her thoughts.

"Yeah." She nervously laughed. "I-it's crazy."

"Right. Crazy."

"What am I supposed to do now?" Arnold thought. "Someone should write a book, 'How to Get Out of Awkward Situations with Girls'."

"Why is he just staring at me? Why doesn't he say anything?"

"Why is she just staring at me? Why doesn't she say anything?"

Helga was strongly aware that Arnold's arms were still around her. She knew that all he had to do was give some kind of signal, and she would throw herself at him unmercifully.

"Keep it together!" she thought to herself. "You can't let your emotions get the better of you!"

"She looks so worried. Well, I guess I am too. At least this is better than having her yelling at me. But still…"

"Why the heck won't he say anything?! Gosh, he looks good. Oh, man, what I wouldn't give for us to stay like this forever…"

"Man, what I wouldn't give for this to be over!"

"I can't stand looking into his eyes much longer! I swear, I'll just die! How is it even possible that mere mortal eyes can be so beautiful?"

"I can't stand looking into her eyes much longer! They're too mesmerizing…"

"If something doesn't happen-"

"-in the next ten seconds-"

"-I swear-"

"-I'm going-"

"-to-"

Arnold shifted slightly, trying to give Helga the message that she should get off of him. It didn't exactly work that way. He momentarily lost his balance and in the panic of almost falling off the branch, grabbed Helga's shoulder.

"Oh, no. Now I'm gonna get it." He waited for her fist to come in contact with his stomach, but it never did. He looked at her cautiously. She was staring at him, just as before, only now she looked much more shocked.

"Um…Helga?" he finally spoke.

"Hmm?"

The sunlight played in the leafs, sending queer little patches of golden shapes all over the forest. Everything seemed so magical, so beautiful. Suddenly Arnold felt the irresistible urge to…do something…he wasn't sure what…

"Kiss me," Helga thought, almost deliriously, "Please, just kiss me."

The sunlight continued to dance among them.

The breeze did nothing to lessen the stifling heat.

Everything was silent.

Everything was waiting.

The desire was too strong.

The temptation was unbearable…

"We should, um, probably get going."

"Get going?"

"Yeah. Like, back to the beach."

"Beach?" What was he talking about?

"Yeah, the beach!" Now that he had her attention, he wasn't about to let the opportunity to get out of this mess slip away. "Come on, let's go."

Helga shook her head. "Oh, right, the beach." Had her imagination taken over? Or had it really happened…well, what did it matter now? The moment was ruined. "And you better not let anything like this ever happen again, got it? Sheesh, quit getting all mushy with me."

"Whatever you say, Helga."

They slid down the trunk of the tree and started to walk aimlessly through the jungle. What happened was still fresh in their minds, but they both knew it was better to just forget about it.


	50. Cecile?

**Chapter 50**

**Cecile?**

"How much longer?" Helga said irritably.

"I don't know," Arnold replied for the umpteenth time that day.

"We've been walking for days! How far away can the beach be?"

"Maybe we took a wrong turn. I don't remember walking this far before."

"Why do you want to make it to the beach so badly anyway? What's on the beach?"

"Well…" Arnold racked his brain for an answer. "There's probably a better chance of being found if we're there."

"Oh, right. I'm sure there are countless people out there who have nothing better to do with their time then sail around deserted, undiscovered islands, searching for stranded people!"

"Okay, okay, I get your point. But we might as well try to make it to the beach. What else have we got to do?"

"I don't know. Let's go jump off a cliff," Helga said, rolling her eyes.

"That's smart."

"It's better than traipsing through a stupid jungle, trying to make it to a retarded beach that isn't even going to help us!"

"At least we've got food now," Arnold said, trying, as always, to look on the bright side.

"Please, don't mention that. I swear, if I eat one more banana, I'll puke."

"It's better that seaweed."

"I wish we could just go back to the city somehow", Helga said wistfully. "Before the flood, before any of this ever happened."

"Me too."

"I hate this whole thing!" she shouted. "Why'd it have to happen to me, of all people?"

"Maybe it's punishment for all the mean things you've done."

"Oh, sure. And that explains why you're here too."

"It does?"

"Yeah. It just makes my punishment all the more fulfilling for it to be shared with a football head. Don't you think?"

Arnold glared at her. "I wish we could get off this island. Then I could stop hanging around you."

Helga ducked under a branch. "Oh, yeah? Well, I wish that-"

Suddenly, the end of her bow caught on the branch. She took a step forward, and the bow came undone. Her long blond hair fell out of its pigtails and fell over her shoulders.

"Oh, criminy, just my luck," she muttered. "Now on top of everything else, my hair's gonna be in my face." She turned around to see Arnold staring at her like she had grown another head. "What are you looking at, football head?" she snapped.

"Cecile?" Arnold asked, his voice barley a whisper. He took a step toward her.

Helga stared at him, panic stricken. "What the heck is he talking about?!" she thought. Then it struck her. "Oh, criminy, me hair! He's never seen me with my hair down…except when I was Cecile."

"Cecile?" Arnold asked again, coming a little closer.

She froze. There was no way out now. No way to escape. She couldn't move. She couldn't tear away from his stare.

Arnold took two steps closer and reached out his hand, as if to touch her hair.

Helga turned around and ran. She flew through the jungle, but he was right on her tail.

"I've got to get away from him!" The thought bounced around in her head, her primary focus. "I've got to get away!"

She started to run faster, but Arnold was directly behind her. Suddenly, he tripped over a root that was jutting out of the ground. Helga turned around in surprise as he pushed her down. She fell backwards onto the ground, and he landed right on top of her.

Helga blinked in surprise, trying to process everything that was going on. Everything was happening too fast.

"What's he gonna do?" she thought in a panic.

Arnold stared at her for a minute with a dazed expression on his face. Then he slowly lifted his hand and ran his fingers through her hair. She melted at his touch but tried not to show it.

Suddenly, his expression changed. She swore, she could see the idea enter his mind.

"Oh, my…he wouldn't dare…he couldn't…" she thought in confusion.

He leaned in closer.

She nervously laughed. "You wouldn't," she taunted, clearly saying that she didn't even think he was capable of doing it. I mean, this was _Arnold_, the innocent little perfect boy who always did the right thing. There was just no way…

"I wouldn't." He leaned closer.

Helga relaxed. "You wouldn't," she said with relief.

"I wouldn't," he reassured her, with a mischievous glint in his eyes. He came in closer.

"Oh, my…you would…" she gasped. She glanced around. Should she try to get away? She couldn't. Even if she _was _one of the strongest kids in school, the fact still remained that she was a girl, and Arnold was a boy. When it really came down to it, he was probably stronger. There was no way for her to escape. He was in control. If he was _really _going to do what she thought he was going to do, there would be nothing she could do to stop him.

"I wouldn't." He almost sounded offended that she didn't believe him. He leaned closer.

"You would," she said accusingly.

Arnold looked at her curiously and smiled. He seemed to be thinking it over. "I would."

She stared at him in shock. "_You would_?!"

He laughed. "I would."

Closer.

He was so close to her that she could feel his breath on her lips.

"I can't believe this! He's really going too!" Helga thought with a mixture of happiness and fear. "Apart from the fact that he now knows I'm Cecile, and I've got to get away ASAP if I want my secret to be safe…this is probably the best day of my life."

The touch of his hand against her cheek brought her back to reality. "You would?" she asked again.

"I would."

Closer.

"You wou-"

She was suddenly cut off as he closed the space between them, tenderly pressing his lips to hers. She closed her eyes and kissed him back. She chanted his name over and over in her head, allowing the feeling to sink in.

"Arnold, Arnold, Arnold, Arnold…"

After what seemed like an eternity, he finally pulled back. Helga

stared into his eyes, dizzy with happiness. Arnold slowly got up and stood at her feet. He looked at her in confusion, like he couldn't tell what was going on. He extended his hand to her to help her up. She took his hand and shakily stood up.

Helga pulled her hand back and took a few uneasy steps backwards. She felt like she was going to faint.

"Oh…my…" She grabbed a tree for support.

"Helga, I-"

Whatever it was he had been trying to say, she never heard it. She turned around and ran away from him. She raced blindly through the forest. She didn't once look back.


	51. It's now or never

**Chapter 51**

**It's now or never…**

Helga ran until she saw a cave.

"Okay, I'll rest here." She leaned against the side of the cave and tried to catch her breath. "I can't believe he did that!" she exclaimed to no one in particular. "He kissed me! He seriously kissed me! If he's done the one thing I've prayed he would do, how come I'm so scared?" She glanced at her bow, still clutched in her hand. "Oh, yeah. Because now he knows that I'm Cecile. And there's _no way _he'll let me off the hook this time. How the heck am I gonna keep my secret a secret?" She tied her hair back up in its usual hair style, slowly coming to the most shocking decision of her nine-year-old life. "Maybe…maybe I _shouldn't _keep it a secret. Maybe I should let him know. I mean, I've been loving him in secret for two thirds of my life! Maybe it's time." She smiled. "Plus, now that he knows I'm Cecile, and he loves Cecile, maybe he'll love me too.

Helga sighed and took out her poetry book. She needed to write one last poem before she spilled everything.

_It's now or never._

_Come hold me tight._

_Kiss me, my darling._

_Be mine tonight._

_Tomorrow will be too late._

_It's now or never,_

_my love won't wait._

_When I first saw you,_

_with your smile so tender,_

_my heart was captured;_

_my soul surrendered._

_I've spent a lifetime,_

_waiting for the right time._

_Now that you're near,_

_the time is here_

_at last._

_Today I'll tell you_

_of my hidden emotion,_

_of true love,_

_and sweet devotion._

_Your lips excite me._

_Let your arms invite me,_

_for who know when_

_we'll meet again_

_this way._

"Ceci-um…Helga?"

Helga slammed her book shut. "What do you want, football head?"

"Look, I'm really sorry for what I did but…I mean, I just can't believe it…_you're _Cecile?"

"Um…" She stared at the ground.

"Criminy! How am I supposed to do this?" she thought. "I…I can't! I can't tell him!" She turned around to run into the cave.

"Helga, wait! Can you please stop running away? Can't you at least talk to me?"

Helga looked at him with tears in her eyes. "I can't!" She ran into the cave.

Arnold ran in after her. She was leaning against a wall, staring at a heart shaped locket, mumbling something he couldn't understand.

She looked up and gasped. Then she quickly put the locket in her dress. "Quit following me, will ya?"

"I just don't get it!" Arnold exclaimed. "_You're _Cecile?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm Cecile. So what?"

"So what?! I've been searching for Cecile for months! I can't believe it!"

"Cecile went back to France…"

"You know what I mean, Helga."

"O-okay, fine, I know what you mean."

"But…why? How come you pretended to be Cecile?"

"I-I don't know. Valentine's Day was a long time ago. I don't remember," she lied.

"Yeah, right. Come on, why'd you do it?"

"No reason…"

"Helga."

"Well…I had nothing better to do…so I just…"

"Is that the best you can come up with?"

"Um…" she thought for any possible answer, other than the truth. "I wanted to make your life miserable be having you chase after a girl who didn't exist?"

"Oh, come on, Helga! I'm serious! Why'd you do it?"

"I…I can't tell you!" she said, her voice breaking. "I'm so sorry…I would, but…" She started advancing toward the entrance of the cave. "…but I'm not ready. I-I'll tell you someday…just not today." She walked to the entrance and then turned to him. She sadly smiled. "Au revoir, Arnold."

Arnold reached out and grabbed her hand. He drew her towards him, against her will.

"Not this time. I lost you once, but I'm not gonna lose you again."

"Arnold, I-"

Suddenly, the ground started to shake with violent tremors. The pieces of rock flew everywhere, and soon the entrance of the cave was completely covered with small boulders.

"Helga, look out!" Arnold pushed her against the side of the cave, away from the falling rocks.

"What the heck's going on?!" Helga screamed.

"An earthquake!"

A boulder flew right past them. Helga fell to the ground to avoid being hit. Arnold dropped to his knees and put his arms over her to protect her.

After a couple minutes, the earthquake subsided. Rocks lay everywhere, and the cave's entrance was entirely blocked.

"Arnold, are we alive?" Helga asked, her eyes still closed.

"I think so."

Helga shakily sat up, and Arnold put his arms around her to steady her.

"You okay?"

She jumped up, taking his helpful gesture the wrong way. "Oh, no. Don't you _dare _try to kiss me again, bucko!" She backed away nervously.

"I told you I was sorry for that. It was just, I'd been looking for Cecile for so long, and when I saw you…her…I just kind of snapped."

"Yeah, well…just don't try anything on me again." Helga walked over to the entrance. She tried to move one of the rocks, but it wouldn't budge. "This isn't good."

"What?"

"Now I'm trapped in a cave with a football head who wants to kiss me."

"I never said that!" He paused. "But you are a good kisser."

Helga whirled around to face him, blushing fiercely. "I'm _what_?!"

"Nothing, Cecile. Forget I said anything."

"Quit calling me Cecile! You're as bad as Big Bob! He's _constantly _calling me Olga, and now _you're _gonna call me Cecile? Is the world against my name or something? I'm not Olga, and I'm not Cecile! I'm Helga! H-E-L-G-A-!"

"But you are Cecile!" Arnold protested. "I mean, maybe that's not really your name, but you _are _Cecile."

"Not really. I'm not the _real _Cecile. I was just pretending to be because…"

"Because why?"

"I can't tell."

"How many times are you going to use that excuse?" Arnold said, getting slightly irritated. "'I can't tell.' First you can't tell me who you are, and now you can't tell me _why_. Can you tell me anything?"

"I could, but I won't," she said matter-of-factly. 

"Why not? What do you think I'm going to do? Tell someone? There's no one to tell!"

"I know, but…"

"But what?! Come on, Helga, what's the big secret?"

"Don't do this to me Arnold," Helga thought. "Don't make me confess."

"Well? I'm not gonna let you get away with it this time, so you might as well tell me."

"Okay, okay. I guess it was just because you were having that date with Ruth, and I didn't want you to," she blurted out.

This wasn't the answer he had been expecting. "Why not? Why should you care if I went on a date with her?"

"I-I don't know. I guess because I was…" She stared at the ground. "Jealous."

"Jealous? Of what?"

She jerked her head back up. "Hey, if it was Valentine's Day, and the one person you had ever loved in your entire life was on a date with a snobby sixth grader, don't you think you'd be jealous too?!"

"Sure, I guess, but…what did you just say?!"  
Helga wasn't sure exactly why she was saying all this, and she desperately wanted to stop, but the words wouldn't cease. "You know perfectly well what I said! I said love! Love, love, love, love, love!"

"Huh?"

"Yes, Arnold, yes! I love you, I love you, I love you!"

"You _what_?!"

The words began to spill out in a rush. "I love you, Arnold! I absolutely adore you! I have for six, long, torturous, amazing years! I have ever since the first time we ever met! It was love at first sight! And from then on, for every blessed day of my cursed existence, I've longed for you in the shadows, filling volumes of books with obsessive love poems about you, building shrines to you, stalking you night and day, waiting for the wondrous day where I could finally confess to you my undying love and affection, and you would at last know the unspoken love I have hidden in my heart!" She paused for breath and looked to see what Arnold's reaction was.

He looked like someone had just told him that World War Three had started.

"Oh, criminy, I scared him!" she thought. "Oh, well. He had better get used to it!"

Arnold started to back away slowly. "Wait…what are you talking about? You _love _me?"

She marched up to him. "Doi! Do you think I would have said all that if I didn't?!"  
He backed into the wall of the cave. "No, but you can't! That's just…not possible! You hate me!"

Helga looked at him with a hurt look in her eyes. "I don't hate you, Arnold! I could never hate you! Please don't think that!"

"But…you're always so mean…"

"But I had to be, Arnold! How else would I have kept you from knowing my secret? I have to boss you around and call you names and…oh, that doesn't matter now! It's all in the past! Now all that matters is that you know, and at last we can be together!"

"What?! No! Helga, I really think this whole 'trapped in a cave' thing has gone to your head. You don't really mean what you're saying. You hate me, remember?" Arnold said, half trying to convince her, half trying to convince himself.

"You don't believe me?! I just poured my guts out to you, and you don't believe me?! What do I have to do, kiss you or something?!"

"You wouldn't," Arnold said nervously, pressing himself flat against the wall.

"To heck I wouldn't!" Helga exclaimed, thrusting herself into his arms. She bent her head and looked into his eyes. "Arnold, my love, kiss me! I want to feel your lips next to mine!"

"Helga, really, I-"

"Oh, just shut up!"

She pulled him towards her and feverishly kissed him. Arnold tried to pull away, but she held him tight and wouldn't let him. She poured all the love she had ever felt for him into that one kiss. She kissed him as long as she possibly could, and only the lack of oxygen made her pull back.

"Wow. That was good," she said breathlessly.

"You mean it's _true_?!" Arnold exclaimed.

"Of course it's true! What, do you _still _not believe me?" she said, tightening her grip on him.

"NO! No, I believe you!" Arnold said in a panic, somehow managing to free himself. "It's just…a lot to take in."

"Oh, I know, but you'll get used to it," Helga said comfortingly.

"Not likely. I mean, I always knew I had a secret admirer, and I figured that she was probably Cecile, but you! I _never _even imagined it was _you_!"

"Well, you should have! You're the densest person I ever met! I was dropping hints left and right, and you just couldn't catch on that I'm hopelessly, obsessively, passionately, devotedly, madly in love with you!" Helga shouted.

"So…that letter was from you? And those poems were about me? And-"

"Yes! It was me! I did everything! You know Mr. Huynh's daughter? I'm the one who found her for you. And you know how my father lost to your grandfather in that Parent's Day thing? That's cause I helped him. And…anything else that happened that you didn't think was possible, I did! I did everything! Everything!" She threw herself at him once again. "Oh, Arnold, just hold me! Hold me, and never let go!"

"Shh, listen!" Arnold whispered, breaking free from her grasp. "Did you hear something?"

"What?"

"Did you hear something just now?"

"No."

Suddenly, they heard a loud rasping sound, coming from behind the cave.

"See, there it is again! But where's it coming from?" he said, walking over to the back wall of the cave, which was covered by a blanket of hanging vines. He pulled the vines aside and was staring into a dark, narrow passage. "Come on, Helga! It might lead to a way out!"

"But what about the noise?" Helga asked worriedly.

"This is the only chance we have to get out of here, so we're gonna have to take it."

"Oh, Arnold, my valiant hero! How brave you are, setting forth into the depths of danger, so that we may journey together-"

"Okay, you're gonna have to not do that. No poetry. The noise might hear us. We have to keep quiet."

"Oh, right. Sorry, my love," Helga whispered.

Arnold sighed and stepped into the passage. "Come on."


	52. The Stalker

**Chapter 52**

**The Stalker**

They walked in silence through the dark tunnel, barley able to see what was two feet in front of them. The strange noise kept following them, but they couldn't tell where it was coming from. They continued walking down the path, until it suddenly branched out into two sections.

"Now what?" Helga whispered.

"We'll go to the right. The noise seems to be louder on the left."

They tiptoed down the right passage, but the strange noise only kept getting louder. The tunnel branched out into four new tunnels. The noise seemed to be coming from every one of them. It was all around them. There was no escape.

"We're gonna die! It's gonna come and pounce on us and tear us limb from limb and-"

"No, it's not, Helga! Come on!" He grabbed her hand, and they ran down a random tunnel. This too branched out, but they kept running down tunnel after tunnel, heading deeper and deeper into the cave, constantly trying to flee from the ever-present noise.

Suddenly, they came face to face with a wall.

"Dead end!" Arnold shouted.

"Now what do we do?" Helga cried in dismay.

The noise kept getting louder and louder, coming closer and closer to them with alarming speed. Now they could hear footsteps moving slowly and deliberately through the tunnel. Closer and closer…

"There's nothing we can do," Arnold said nervously. "Except wait."

They stood in the dark, their hands tightly clasped together; waiting for whatever terror might come.

Suddenly, something scampered across Helga's foot.

"What the…" She peered through the darkness, and her eyes came to rest on…

"OH, MY GOSH! A RAT!" she screamed, jumping into Arnold's arms. She started to scream uncontrollably.

"Quiet! Do you want to noise to find us?" Arnold whispered.

Helga continued to scream.

"Boy, she wasn't kidding when she said she was afraid of rats," Arnold thought. "I've got to get her to be quiet! She's in my arms." This last thought surprised him a bit. "Oh, great, is she going to kiss me again or something? Hmm…maybe that's not such a bad idea. It would keep her quiet anyway." Quickly, before he could change his mind, he pulled her towards him and firmly pressed his lips to hers.

Helga immediately became silent. She opened her eyes wide in shock but quickly closed them.

"Oh, my gosh! He must love me!" she thought deliriously. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him with as much passion as she could muster.

"Oh, man, I shouldn't have done that!" Arnold thought, blushing fiercely. "Now she's not gonna let go."

They were so lost in their kiss that they didn't notice the figure coming towards them.

"Uhhh…get away…uhh…from her."

They both quickly pulled back and looked at their intruder.

"_BRAINY_?!"

"Uhhh…"

"Oh, you've gone too far," Helga said threateningly. "Interrupting my daydreams is one thing, but interrupting _this_?!"

"Uhhh…"

"What did you have to do that for?!"

"Uhhh…I love you."

"Oh, gee, I'm so flattered," she said sarcastically. "You're too late Brainy, cause he loves me too," she said happily, gesturing to Arnold.

"No, I don-"

"Uhhh…okay."

"Wait a minute…what the heck are you doing here?!"

"Uhhh…something."

"Helga?" Arnold asked.

"What? Oh! Sorry," she said, slightly embarrassed, jumping out of his arms. "Um…thanks for saving me. And for ki…um…shutting me up."

"Oh, uh…no problem," Arnold said sheepishly.

"What the heck am I saying?!" he thought to himself.

"Uhh…how dare…uhh…you," Brainy wheezed, turning to Arnold.

"How dare I what?" he asked, confused.

"How dare you…uhh…steal her from…uhh…me."

"I didn-"

"Oh, come on, Brainy, like there's any chance of me being with you. Get real. You of all people should know that the only one I could ever love is Arnold."

"Uhh…"

"I mean, criminy! You were spying on me practically every second of my life! You probably know more than anyone else!"

"Uhh…but I…uhh…love you."

Helga sighed. "Look, Brainy, if you really love me so much, then you'd want me to be happy, right?"

"Uhh…yeah."

"And the only way I'll ever be happy is if I'm with Arnold."

"Uhhh…"

"So, if you really love me, then you'll _want _me to be with Arnold. Get it?"

"Uhh…okay," Brainy said dejectedly.

"Good. Now that that's settled, why the heck are you here?!"

"Uhhh…I don't know."

"Brainy, there has to be a reason you're on this island," Arnold said, jumping into the conversation.

"Yeah, you couldn't have just appeared here…wait a minute, if you're here, then you must have some sort of transportation, which means we're saved! Right? _Please _tell me I'm right."

Instead of answering her, Brainy shouted into the darkness, "I found…uhh…them…"

Suddenly, two men dressed in sunglasses and army uniforms ran into the tunnel.

"Good work, son," one of them said to Brainy. "Your country thanks you."

"Uhh…"

"Okay, let's get these kids back home!" the other man shouted. Turning to Arnold and Helga he said, "Follow us."


	53. Rescued

**Chapter 53**

**Rescued**

After running through a confusing maze of twists and turns, they finally made it out of the cave. Two jet black helicopters rested on the ground, their propellers whirring madly.

"Climb on in!" the first man said, opening the door for them.

Arnold and Helga struggled against the wind of the propeller, their hair blowing widely around their faces. They finally managed to climb in, and the man slammed the door behind them then climbed in the passenger seat in front. There was another man seated at the driver's seat, wearing the same uniform as the other two men.

"Hey, what about Brainy?" Arnold said to the men. "What are you going to do, leave him?"

"Not to worry, kid," said the man in the passenger seat. "He's going in the other helicopter. We still have to ask him a few questions about something."

Above the roar of the helicopter, they could faintly hear the man outside. "Now tell me again, _how _did you know they were here?"

Helga sat down on the floor of the helicopter, and Arnold sat down next to her.

She brushed her windblown hair out of her face. "This is why I don't wear my hair down," she muttered. She started to put her hair back into its traditional pigtails, but Arnold stopped her.

"Leave it down," he said, grabbing her wrist.

She looked at him in surprise. "Why?"

"Good question," Arnold thought, wondering why he had said that.

"I don't know," he said out loud. "I just think it looks good down."

"You do?" Helga asked in astonishment. It wasn't everyday that he said something nice about her.

"Yeah." Then he was silent.

Helga wasn't sure what she was supposed to do. He loved her…but now what? She wished he would say something, anything. The silence was too much. She was faintly aware of the helicopter taking off and flying away from the island, but she was so dazed by what was going on that she barley noticed.

He loved her. He actually _loved _her. Her football headed love god, whom she had worshiped since she first set eyes on him, _loved _her.

"What will everyone say?" she thought, suddenly worried. The odds of anyone even surviving the flood were pretty slim, but with all that was happening, the chance of their survival didn't seem all that impossible anymore. "It isn't everyday that the bully and the victim fall in love." She was sure her classmates would have a hard time adjusting to it. And she was sure she'd get her fair share of teasing. But right now she didn't care what they thought. She finally had the one thing she had always wanted, and nothing was going to spoil it for her.

She wanted desperately to do something, _anything_, but she couldn't. Not in front of…whoever these people were. For now, she would just have to wait in that dreadful silence.

It was the man in the passenger seat that finally spoke.

"So, where exactly do you kids live?"

"Hillwood City, Washington," they said in unison.

"_Washington_? How the heck did you get down here?"

"On a raft," Helga said simply.

"Where exactly were we?" Arnold asked.

"Believe it or not, you kids were on an undiscovered island off the coast of California."

"_California_?!"  
"Yep. I can't believe you kids actually made it down there. How long exactly were you on that raft?"

They glanced at each other.

"Um…"

"I don't remember…"

"Well, that's okay. The point is that you kids are finally making it back to civilization. Me and my buddy James here will take you right back home."

"Thanks," Arnold said, "but how did you even know where we were…um…"

"Jack Larson. Call me Jack. It's the strangest story, really. See, your friend with the breathing problem, Brian-"

"Brainy."

"Brainy, called us at the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and said that he knew where you two were. So, naturally, we were real excited, since we'd been searching the country top to bottom for you guys-"

"You were?" Arnold interrupted.

"Yep. Your grandparents have been real worried, calling 24/7. Your grandmother even resorted to stealing one of our jets to try and find you."

"Is she okay?"

"Oh, yeah, she's fine. But they've both been worried sick."

"What about my parents?" Helga asked, without much enthusiasm.

"Your parents? Yeah, they called a couple times. Kept calling you 'Olga' though. Must 'a been real confused."

"Yeah," she said sarcastically. "Confused."

"So, anyway, we arranged to meet Brainy, and he said you guys were on a little island by California. We kind of thought he was kidding cause how would he have known that? But he seemed so darn convinced that he knew where you were that we decided to give him a try. Turns out he navigated us right to that island, then to that cave, then to you. I tell ya, that kid's some sort of a freak."

"Well, duh," Helga said.

"But how did he know where we were?" Arnold asked, not really believing the story.

"To tell you the truth, I haven't got a clue. That's why we're taking him back to our headquarters. If he's got some sort of 'psychic abilities', then who knows what else he could find!"

"So…you're kidnapping him so he can be part of your detective team?"

"Nah, he'll be back in time for school tomorrow."

"Drat," Helga muttered.

"Alright, I'll be even with ya. The kid did give one reason, it just doesn't make much sense. He said it was because he was so in love with you-" Jack gestured to Helga "-that he could track you from anywhere in the universe. Personally, I don't think he's your type. He's just too…weird. No offense or anything. Now you and, and, what's your name kid?"

"Arnold."

"Yeah, you and Arnold would make a cute couple. But that's just me."

"You really think so?" Helga asked in astonishment. No one had ever said that before. Plenty of people said that Arnold and Lila made a cute couple but _her _and Arnold? No one had ever said that. No one would have dared.

"Sure I do," Jack said, laughing. "But don't let it go to your head. You kids can't be more than ten. You're too young for love. Then again, you were alone on an island…" He laughed again. "Ah, youth. It's so crazy. Don't you think, James?"

"Hmmm," the pilot muttered monotonically.

"Exactly what I was thinking, James."


	54. He loves me!

**Chapter 54**

**He loves me!**

They lapsed into silence once more.

"Not again!" Helga thought. "Well, at least there's one thing I can do." She reached into her pocket and pulled out her poetry book. "Should I? I mean, Arnold's right here." She thought for a minute. "Well, he already knows that I like him. Love him. Obsessed with him. Whatever. And it's not like he hasn't seen me writing before. Besides, he loves me back, so there's no risk!" She said that sentence to herself again. She still couldn't believe it. "He loves me!" Struck by inspiration, she opened her book and began to write.

_My own true love,_

_my own true love,_

_at last I've found you,_

_my own true love._

_No lips but yours,_

_no arms but yours,_

_will ever lead me_

_through Heaven's doors._

_I've waited so long_

_in search of this._

_I knew I'd know _

_by your kiss!_

_And by your kiss_

_you've shown true love._

_I'm yours forever,_

_my own true love._

Helga glanced at Arnold out of the corner of her eye and was surprised to find him staring at her.

"What do you want, bucko?" she snapped at him.

"What?" he asked, snapped out of his trance.

"Quit staring at me, will ya? It's creeping me out!"

"Oh, was I? Sorry."

"You should be." Helga closed her book and put it back in her pocket.

"I can't believe I was so rude to him!" she thought. "If I don't want to lose him faster than I got him, I'd better start being myself and stop being the girl he hates."

She looked back at him. "You know I didn't mean any of that, right, Arnold? Just, you know, bad habits that I gotta break. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been so mean to you. If you really have nothing better to do with your time than stare at me…then I guess you can. I don't really mind." She shyly stared at the ground.

"You kids mind keepin' it down?" Jack asked. "There seems to be some sort of a storm up ahead, and I need to check it out."

"You got it, Jack," Helga replied.


	55. Internal Conflict

**Chapter 55**

**Internal Conflict**

"I can't believe we're actually going home!" Arnold thought to himself. "I was really starting to think that I was going to spend the rest of my life in that cave. It's a good think they came when they did. I don't know what Helga would have ended up doing if they didn't. I still don't know what she'll do. But no, she wouldn't do anything drastic with these guys here…would she? I mean, I know she loves me, but-" He stopped himself, realizing what he had just said for the first time. "She loves me," he thought to himself in amazement. "Helga G. Pataki loves me. Wow. I guess it kind of makes sense. She _is _always helping me. And she's been nice to me…when no one else is around. It all sort of fits together now. All the mean things she's ever done she just did to hide her secret. She just did it out of…love." He looked at her, trying to figure out what she was thinking, but she was staring at the ground and didn't notice.

"I should say something to her," he continued to think. "I can't go on forever, not speaking to her. But what do you say to a girl who's kissed you three times in one day?!"

_"One time," a little voice in the back of his head corrected him. "She kissed you one time. You kissed her twice."_

"Shut up."

_"You did," it taunted him._

"Okay, yeah, I did, but so what? It doesn't mean anything. Besides, I had to do it! I mean, that noise could have been something really dangerous, and if she didn't stop screaming, we could have been killed! I had to make her be quiet! It was just really extreme, so I did the first thing that popped into my mind. It's not like I _wanted _to do it. But drastic times call for drastic measures."

"_Oh, is _that _what you call it," the voice continued._

"I thought I told you to shut up! And anyway, it worked, didn't it?"

_"Maybe a little too well."_

"What's that supposed to mean?"

_"You know."_

"What, that she kissed me back?"

_"There you go!"_

"Please, don't remind me. I honestly didn't think that she would."

_"Yeah, right. You knew very well she would. She just told you that she loved you! What did you think she would do?"_

"I don't know. I was just going to do it fast. Just enough to shock her; to get her quiet. Nothing more. Nothing romantic. But she…didn't let me."

_"Why didn't you just pull away? You're stronger. You could have."_

"No, I couldn't! She was holding me too tight! I couldn't move! I couldn't breath! I couldn't even think straight! The only thing I could do was play along."

_"You mean kissing her back?"_

"Well…maybe. I-I don't remember. Okay, yeah, I guess I did. But not like she did! She went wild! There was so much passion and energy…I didn't know a fourth grader could do something like that! It was…amazing."

_"Amazing? You don't say."_

"Yeah. In a kind of scary way."

_"If it was so scary, why'd you kiss her back?"_

"Because…I don't know. I was too caught up in the heat of the moment. I mean, think about it. I was trapped in a dark cave, probably about to die, with a beautiful girl in my arms who's kissing me like nothing I've ever felt before. Everything just sort of added together, and I had to give in to…did I just call Helga beautiful?"

_"That's what I heard."_

"But why would I think that?"

_"Maybe you love her."_

"_What_?! Are you crazy?! How could I love Helga?!"  
_"You've gotta admit, that's what it's sounding like."_

"I can't believe I'm talking about this."

_"You started it!"_

"No, I didn't! Why am I talking to myself anyway? Isn't that the first sign of going crazy?"

_"Yeah. Crazy in love."_

"Stop saying that!"

_"If you don't love her, then what _do _you think of her?"_

"I-I…I don't know. I-I've got to stop thinking about her. I've got to just stop thinking about her. Think of anything but Helga. Okay, the sky is blue. I can do better than that. We're going home. Brainy found us, and now we're going home. Wait, if Brainy found us, then he obviously survived the flood. Does that mean everyone else did too? And if they did, does that mean Lila too? Is she okay? Will she be waiting for me? Has she been worried? Has she missed me? Do I care?"


	56. The Wonder of You

**Chapter 56**

**The Wonder of You**

"Hey, you kids don't mind if I turn on the radio, do ya?" Jack said suddenly, interrupting Arnold's thoughts.

"What?! Oh…yeah, go ahead."

"I don't care," Helga said dreamily, trying to get back to reality. She had been staring at Arnold for the past hour and was still trying to snap out of her dreamlike state.

Arnold turned at the sound of her voice. "Oh, no. Not again," he thought. "Right when I had gotten her out of my head."

Helga looked him in the eye but then turned away, blushing. Arnold turned away quickly and stared at the ceiling, trying once again not to think about her.

Jack flipped a switch, and the voice of Elvis Presley filled the helicopter.

_When no one else can understand me_

_When everything I do is wrong_

"Oh, no, not a love song," Arnold thought in dismay. "That's the last thing I need now."

_You give me hope and constellation_

_You give me strength to carry on_

"Oh, good, a love song!" Helga thought happily. "This is just what I need."

_And you're always there_

_To lend a hand _

_You help in everything I do_

_That's the wonder_

_The wonder of you_

"Don't think about Helga, don't think about Helga," Arnold chanted to himself. "This is pointless. How can I stop thinking about her if I'm thinking about not thinking about her? And I wish this song would end! It's too close to what's going on. Helga _does _help me in just about everything. But so what? That's just because _she _loves _me_. It doesn't mean that I love her back."

_And when you smile the world is brighter_

_You touch my hand and I'm a king_

_Your kiss to me is worth a fortune_

_Your love for me is everything_

Helga glanced at Arnold. He was staring at the ceiling and didn't notice.

"I've got to do something," she thought. "I can't just sit next to him with a love song playing doing nothing! If it wasn't for those stupid pilots I'd…well, they are here. But I should do something. I love him, and he loves me. I shouldn't have to hide anything anymore. But I can't let people know my secret! Not now anyway. Not even these two complete strangers that I'll probably never see again. Maybe I can do something that they won't notice…"

She slowly lifted her hand and placed it on top of Arnold's. Then she stared intently at the floor, afraid of what his reaction might be.

_I guess I'll never know_

_The reason why_

_You love me as you do_

_That's the wonder_

_The wonder of you_

A wonderful, tingling sensation ran through Arnold's body the second their hands touched. He felt his face grow hot but continued to stare at the ceiling, pretending he didn't care.

"Why should I care, anyway? I don't!" he thought.

_I guess I'll never know_

_The reason why_

_You love me as you do_

_That's the wonder_

_The wonder of you_

Helga nervously laced her fingers through his and held his hand. She was shocked at how bold she was, for this situation anyway.

"I don't want to scare him any more than I already have," she thought. "I mean, sure, he loves me, but I still scared him. I guess I would be scared too if I were in his shoes. Especially after my whole confession thing. I can't believe I said all that! And I actually kissed him…criminy! What did I do that for? It's not like I didn't get enough kissing for one day. Three times! Man, I never thought this would happen. And the best part is, two of the times _he _kissed _me_! This is the best day of my life!"

"I can't believe she's holding my hand," Arnold thought in amazement. "I should really take my hand away. It's no good to her for me to let her keep going on like this. I'm just going to have to break her heart in the end. She knows that, doesn't she? She doesn't actually think that we could ever be together, does she? After all the things she's said and done to me, even if they were to cover up her secret, she still did them, and I can't forgive her for that. She knows that…doesn't she?" But try as he might, he couldn't find the strength to take his hand away. He couldn't tell her just yet. He didn't have the heart to. Not yet…


	57. Jump!

**Chapter 57**

**Jump!**

The helicopter flew for a couple more hours, eventually encountering a severe thunderstorm. The rain pounded on the sides of the helicopter, but inside the storm was barley audible.

Arnold felt himself dosing off. Helga was still holding his hand, not loosening her grip even for an instant. Arnold began to subconsciously stroke her hand, feeling her soft skin beneath his fingers.

"I'm in heaven!" Helga thought happily. "Nothing could possibly ruin this moment."

Suddenly, the helicopter violently lurched forward, jerking both of them out of their thoughts.

"What's going on?"

"Nothing to worry about, kid," Jack said, a concerned edge to his voice. "Just some minor turbulence is all." The helicopter dropped a few feet but then continued to fly. "James, secure all maintenance and check the transmition!"

The pilot flicked a couple switches and turned the steering wheel to the right.

"All systems go!" Jack picked up a CB radio. "This is Corsair to Missing Control! Mission Control! Do you read me?"

Some static could be heard, and then a man's voice came over the intercom.

"Corsair, this is Mission Control. What seems to be the problem?"

"We seem to have some technical difficulties regarding code 2B7D."

"That bad, huh? Did you secure all maintenance?"

"Yes, sir! Sir, the condition is very bad. The storm is something awful, and we have two young kids aboard with us."

"Young kids you say? What exactly is your relative location?"

"We are somewhere over Lacey, Washington."

"How many parachutes do you have with you at the time?'

"Just two sir, for Capt. James and myself."

"Is there any way of the situation improving somewhere in the near future?"

"Not very likely, sir."

"Very well then. Best to let the children have the parachutes."

"Sir?"

"You need to stay and help Capt. James try to land the aircraft safely."

"But, sir, what if we are incapable of doing so?"

"The goal of our organization is to find lost children, is it not?"

"Yes, sir, but-"

"Then you have to insure that the children get safely back to where they came."

"But, sir, what about Capt. James and-"

"But? Did I hear a 'but'? Do we _allow _'buts' in the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, Major Jack?"

"No, sir," Jack replied sheepishly.

"Very good. You have been given you orders, now follow through!" The static returned once again, and Jack turned off the radio.

"What's going on?" Arnold asked.

Jack cleared his throat. "Well…um…you see, it seems that the replacement engine has been struck by lightning, and the fuse has been shot."

"So…"

"So, um, it seems that the helicopter will no longer be able to fulfill its desired assignment…"

"Criminy, we're only nine! Do you think you could try talking in English?" Helga shouted.

"Um…well…"

"WE'RE GOING TO CRASH!" James suddenly screamed.

Everyone turned to look at him. It was the first time he had spoken the whole flight.

"EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF! ABANDON SHIP! THE WORLD'S COMING TO AN END!"

"Get a hold of yourself, James!" Jack cried. "We have to get these kids out of here!"

"Good idea! If we push them overboard, the helicopter won't be so heavy, and we won't crash!"

"Um…not quite what I was thinking…"

Suddenly, James jumped out of his seat and walked in front of Arnold and Helga, a murderous glint in his eyes.

"James, the controls!" Jack cried.

With no one piloting the helicopter, the wind took over the navigation. A strong gust of wind made the helicopter swing hard to the left. James lost his balance and hit his head against the wall. He fell over, unconscious.

"_Please _tell me you know how to fly this thing," Helga said, turning to Jack.

"Um…actually…I'm just the hypotonic transitioner," Jack said worriedly.

"Which is?"

"Unfortunately, nothing important." Jack sighed in defeat. "The only reason I ever went into this business was-"

"I don't care about your less-than-perfect life history! I just want to get the heck out of this broken down contraption before it crashes and we die!"

"Hmm…what?" Jack said, looking at her confusedly. "Oh, yes! The parachutes!"

"The _what_?"

"Parachutes." Jack reached under his seat and pulled out two bags with straps on them. He handed one to her and one to Arnold. "Now just slide your arms through the straps, jump out of the copter, and when you reach about five hundred degrees altitude, pull the tab," Jack explained, as if he did this everyday. "Any questions?"

"I got one bucko," Helga snapped at him, "ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?!"

"Perhaps, but not at the moment. Why?"

"You seriously want me to jump out of a plane?!"

"Helicopter," Jack corrected.

"I don't care what it is! It's big, black and hundreds of miles above the ground, and there's _no _way Helga G. Pataki is jumping out of it!" she said, crossing her arms.

"Yeah, well, guess what? It's also about to crash." The helicopter did another wild drop, tossing them all onto the floor. Jack shakily stood up. "If you still won't jump, I'd gladly like to be in possession of your parachute."

"Don't hold your breath. I'll jump, but I won't be happy about it." She put on the parachute, and so did Arnold.

"Very well then." Jack crossed the aircraft and with great difficulty opened the side door. "Good luck."

"Yeah, whatever, same to you." Helga peered out the door and screamed. "THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO WAY I AM JUMPING! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!"

The helicopter dropped again. Jack dropped to his knees and began to pray.

"Dear Heavenly Father, blessed be You who has…SAVE ME! SAVE ME! SAVE ME!"

"Oh, man, this just isn't my day," Helga muttered.

Arnold came up behind her and took her hand for reassurance. "You can do it, Helga."

"This is _so _my day," Helga thought happily. She looked out the door.

"No, I can't!" she cried.

The helicopter tilted dangerously, almost tipping over.

"If you're gonna do it, THIS WOULD BE THE TIME!" Jack cried.

"Helga, do you remember when we were on the raft?" Arnold said hurriedly.

"Yeah."

"And we thought we would get killed by that wave?"

"Yeah…"

"And remember how you told me not to let go of you because you didn't want to die alone?"

"Yeah…so what's your point?"

"I won't let you die alone."

Helga looked at him, confused.

"We're going together, one way or the other. If you stay, I stay."

She looked at him in shock.

"Yep, that'll work," Arnold thought to himself.

Helga stepped up to the door. "Come on, football head, we've got a plane to jump out of."

"Helicopter," Jack muttered.

"Shut up."

"Okay, Helga, on the count of three?" Arnold asked.

"You got it. Oh, and, Arnold?"

The helicopter dropped again.

"Yeah?"

"Don't let go of my hand, okay?" Helga asked him, fear rising in her voice.

"I can't believe she trusts me this much," Arnold thought in bewilderment. "She's willing to do anything for me. All I need to do is give a little back."

He squeezed her hand. "Never."

Helga smiled at him.

"She's so beautiful when she smiles," Arnold thought absentmindedly.

"Alright, one…"

"Two…"

Helga looked out the door. The ground seemed to be a thousand feet below them. It probably was.

"Two and a half…"

"Two and three quarters…"

They dropped again.

"THREE!"


	58. Falling in More than One Way

**Chapter 58**

**Falling in More than One Way**

Arnold and Helga jumped at the same time. They fell through the warm night air, sprinkled with rain.

"This isn't half bad," Helga thought. "Okay, so it's terrifying, but hey, Arnold's here, right? I mean, what could possibly go wrong?" She drifted into her poetic state. "Flying through the sky with my heavenly angel, with the depths of our love surrounding us, as thick as the dark, mystic night sky. Flying with Heaven above and Earth below and only us, alone in the world, to occupy the peaceful atmosphere of passion and romance. Oh, my beloved, at last my impossible dream has become a reality, at last our love has blossomed into its full potential. I will never let go of you my dear, my one, my only, my love."

"What I wouldn't give to be back on the ground," Arnold thought. "I officially don't like heights. Or falling, for that matter. And to think Helga was the one who was scared!" He glanced over at her and was surprised to see that she was smiling. She seemed completely unaware that they were falling with alarming speed, hundreds of feet in the air, heading closer and closer to the forbidding ground. "That's it; I'm opening this stupid parachute. I don't care if we're supposed to wait until we're five hundred feet above the ground. How are we even supposed to know where we are? I'm not taking any chances. I'm opening it now."

He turned to Helga. "Helga!"

She glanced at him, still in her trance. "Yes, my love?"

"What? Oh, right," Arnold said, choosing to ignore her remarks until they were back on the ground. "Listen, on the count of three, open your parachute. Okay?"

"What?" she shouted, the wind making it too difficult to hear.

"On the count of three," he said a bit louder, "open your parachute."

"Hey, Arnold, do you _think _you could talk just a _little _bit softer?" Helga said sarcastically.

"Okay, one," Arnold began, thinking that she had heard him.

"What?"

"Two-"

"Arnold, you might as well save your breath because I have _no _idea what you're saying."

"Three!" Arnold pulled on the tab Jack had shown them, and immediately a humongous blue parachute started to unfold.

Helga finally got the idea and pulled on her tab. Nothing happened. She tried again. Nothing.

"Oh, criminy! Open, you useless piece of junk!"

"What's wrong?" Arnold shouted over the wind.

"It won't open!" she screamed, starting to fear for her life.

"Oh, my-"

"Arnold, if you let go of my hand I'll kill you in the most brutal method I know!"

Suddenly, Arnold's parachute finished unfolding. For an instant he jerked to a stop, and their hands were almost pulled apart.

"ARNOLD!" Helga screamed.

"Hang on!" he called.

"Arnold, I'm slipping!" she cried, tears forming in her eyes.

"Helga, I-"

"DO SOMETHING!" she cried desperately, her tears threatening to spill.

Arnold reached down and grabbed her other hand. Fighting against gravity, he pulled her up until she was right in front of him. He brought his arms down to her waist and drew her against him as tight as he could.

Once again in his embrace, Helga was sure she was safe. That was, if he could hold onto her. The wind was rushing past them so fast; it might tear them apart any second. She could tell he was already having trouble.

"Helga, I…I can't hold onto you much longer!" Arnold exclaimed.

Helga wrapped her arms around his neck and hung on for dear life.

"Don't you dare, you stupid football head!" she sobbed into his shoulder.

"But the wind is too strong!"

"Well, our love is stronger!"

"Huh?"

Helga stopped crying and took a deep breath. "Listen, Arnold, I love you, and you love me, so regardless of any outside forces, you are going to keep holding me until we are on the ground….Maybe longer than that," she added, almost to herself.

At first Arnold thought she was kidding, but she sounded so serious that he quickly dismissed that thought.

"You're right, Helga," he said softly. He tightened his hold on her, closing off any space that could have possibly been between them. "I've got to keep holding you, and I will. Don't worry." He ran his fingers through her hair. "I'll never let go."

Helga sighed to herself, although he couldn't see it. "You'd better not, bucko, unless you want to answer to Old Betsy."

"I thought you loved me?" Arnold asked, pretending to be confused.

"So? Just because I love the living heck out of you doesn't mean…yes it does," Helga said, trying to cease her continuous harassment. "Sorry, football head." She mentally slapped herself. "See, there I go again. Just don't listen cause I don't mean a word of it."

"I can't believe her!" Arnold thought to himself. "She loves me, and she _still _won't stop bugging me! I can't believe I was actually starting to like her lik-what am I saying?!" he thought with alarm. "She's the one with the crush, not me!" But try as he might, he couldn't stay angry at her for very long, although he did pretend to.

"If you can't say something nice, maybe you shouldn't say anything at all," he told her coldly.

"Hey, I said I was sorry, bucko, what more do you want?" she said, but her voice lacked its usual sarcasm.

"Well, maybe you should just-"

"Look, Arnold," Helga interrupted him, "it isn't everyday that I get to fly through the heavens in your arms, so can we _please _stop fighting so I can enjoy it?"

"_She's _asking _me _to stop fighting?" Arnold thought. "That's a change."

"Helga, all I've ever wanted was for you to stop picking on me all the time, so that we could get along. I've never wanted to fight with you." He paused, and then continued. "It seems like ever since we first met, we've been mortal enemies. And…well…I'm just sick of it. I've always known you had a kinder, gentler side, and I've always wanted to get to know that part of you better."

"You didn't make it very known," she accused him.

"I should have. I'm sorry. But it's not like you gave me many chances! You hardly ever let me get a glimpse of the person you really are, but when you did it was…indescribable. If you were only like that all the time…" Arnold trailed off, mentally telling himself not to finish that thought. "But you never were. You always closed yourself off again. But I knew it wasn't the real you. I knew it was just an act."

"You thought you had me all figured out, didn't you?" Helga asked smugly.

"Not really. It only made you more of a mystery. If you had been all nice or all mean, it would have made sense. And most of the time you were all mean. But then you'd do something completely out of character, and it just…made me think twice about who you really were. Of course, I didn't know _why _you had this split personality, but it was pretty obvious you were hiding something."

"It _was_?!"

"To me anyway. I doubt anyone else noticed, if that's what you're worried about."

"Yeah, figures you'd be the only one," Helga said. "That's one of the things I love about you. You were the first person who ever noticed me."

"Oh, criminy, did I just say that?" she thought worriedly.

"Really?" Arnold asked incredulously.

"Well…yeah. Don't you remember?"

"Remember what?"

"Remember the day we met! Doi!"

"Um…" Arnold tried to recall that day. "Wouldn't that have been sometime around preschool?"

"The first day of preschool!"

"Really? I kind of remember that day…I think there was a girl in the rain that I helped…she seemed sad…but she was really pretty…and she had this bow-"

"Arnold, that was me!" Helga cried in exasperation.

"_What_?!"

"The girl was me!"

"Really?"

"Doi! Who did you think it was?!"

"I-I don't know. Just some girl. I mean, that was years ago! I don't remember everything that happened to the last detail."

"You don't think it would be _that _hard to remember the name of your first crush," Helga said accusingly.

"_Excuse me_?!"

"Wow, you really are dense, aren't you? Do you not remember at all?"

"Wait, back up," Arnold said, his head in a whirl. "You said something about a first crush…"

Helga happily sighed just thinking about it. "Oh, yes, your first crush…"

"Who was it?!"

"What do you mean, 'who was it'? It was me, paste for brains!"

"_What_?! You're kidding…right?"

"Would I lie to you?" Helga said sweetly.

"You have been for the past…" Arnold paused to count, "six years."

"That was a long time ago."

"That was this morning."

"Like I said, it was a long time ago. It seems that way at least."

"I can't believe _Helga _was my first crush," Arnold thought, still not quite believing it. "Why? Why her? What was it, fate? Are we destined to fall in love? No, no I can't love her! I love Lila, not her! I won't let myself love her!" He pondered over his last thought for a moment. "Can you even choose who you love? Oh, no…I can't! It can't be true!"

"I don't get it! Why…how…did I really love you?" he asked, almost afraid of the answer.

"Yes," Helga whispered.

"How do you know? I mean, can anyone even tell what love is when they're three?"

"We could."

"Can anyone tell what love is at all?!" Arnold continued to rant, ignoring her. "I mean, we're only nine! How do we know what love is?"

"I don't get it. What are you saying?"

"Or even you?" he asked. "How do you know what love is?"

"If I told you, you'd probably freak out," Helga told him, slyly smiling.

"No one can really know for sure! What is love anyway?"

"The most wonderful thing in the world. And the most horrible. It's a blessing and a curse."

"How can someone really know if they're in love?" Arnold asked again, determined to get some sort of reasonable answer out of her.

"They just know. It's not something they can control. If it happens, it happens."

"How would you know?" he asked angrily.

"Because I've been in love with you for two thirds of my young life!" Helga snapped back at him.

"Why?"

"Arnold, you're not making any sense! What are you trying to say?"

"I don't know! How can I tell you, when I'm not sure myself?"

Helga sighed and looked down. "Arnold! We're about to lan-"

"Don't interrupt me; I'm trying to tell you something."

"But, Arnold-"

"Don't." He took a deep breath. "Helga, I think I lov-"


	59. False Hope

**Chapter 59**

**False Hope**

Before Arnold could finish his sentence, the parachute dropped them unceremoniously onto the ground. Helga hit the ground first, with Arnold right on top of her, his arms still clutching her against him. They had landed in a large field filled with tall grass that almost came over their heads. The rain had stopped, but the air was very humid and warm because of the lingering moisture. Both of them were too distracted to pay much attention to the scenery.

Helga looked into Arnold's eyes and smiled slightly. "This seems oddly familiar, doesn't it?"

"Oh, s-sorry…" Arnold said uncertainly.

"Don't be. I like it."

Arnold smiled a little and stood up. He offered her his hand, and she took it. Suddenly, he jerked her up, so that they were only an inch apart. Helga gasped, and Arnold took a step backward.

"Sorry, Helga, I-"

"Like I said; no problem."

"How come you're being nice all of a sudden?" Arnold wondered.

"I want you to see me for what I really am."

"It's funny, but I kind of wish you would be mean again," he said, more to himself than to her. "Then I could stop thinking…"

"Thinking what?"

"Um…nothing."

"There has to be something," Helga persisted.

"No, i-it's nothing."

"Then what were you trying to tell me before we landed?"

"It probably wasn't even true."

"What wasn't true? Come on, Arnold, out with it! What are you trying to say?"

Arnold turned around and took a few steps away from her, trying to think straight. Then he turned back to her and softly spoke. "Don't you think nine is too young an age to fall in love?"

"Is _that _what you were trying to tell me?" Helga asked dubiously.

"Just answer the question. Do you think nine is too young? I mean, shouldn't people wait until they have more experience before they decide that they love someone?"

"No."

"No?"

"You're never too young to love."

"Not just any kind of love, _real _love," Arnold explained.

"Even better," she said mischievously.

"Really, Helga," he said impatiently, "I don't want to be doing something wrong by falling in love too soon."

Helga laughed. "You know, I'm just about the worst person to ask about this. _I _fell in love at the age of three. And besides…" She took a step towards him. "How can love ever be wrong?" She stepped closer to him.

"I'm not sure it can be," Arnold whispered. He moved hesitatingly towards her. Something inside of him was screaming for him to turn around and run, and as much as he would have liked to do just that, he couldn't. It seemed like he wasn't in control of himself anymore. This…feeling…had taken over. He'd felt this feeling before, but somehow this time it was different. Stronger. Realer. Better.

He took another step forward, so that they were only a couple of inches apart. He slowly reached down and took hold of her hand. Then he shifted his gaze to her eyes.

"I never realized how beautiful her eyes are," he found himself thinking. "They're like sapphires. Dazzling sapphires."

Helga looked deep into his eyes, trying to make sense of what was happening. Well, at least _something _was happening. But what?  
"Arnold, what-"

"Oh, sorry, sorry, Helga," Arnold said quickly, breaking the stare. He let go of her hand and nervously rubbed his arm.

"Well…that was meaningless," Helga thought disappointedly.

"We should…um…probably get going," Arnold said, trying to avoid eye contact.

"Y-yeah. Let's try to find a road or something."

"Okay."

They both turned to start walking, and their arms brushed against each one another. They stopped dead in their tracks and stood stalk still, waiting for the other to say something.

After a few moments of tense silence, Helga spoke.

"Um…look, Arnold…I-I mean-"

She was cut off as Arnold grabbed onto both her arms and spun her around to face him. Her breath caught in her throat.

"Helga…"

Oh, no. It was that voice again. The same voice he had used when they were back in the tree. Back when she thought he loved her. But this time…he did.

"Helga?"

She slowly allowed her gaze to return to his emerald eyes. "Yes, Arnold?" she whispered.

Slowly he let go of her arms and brought his arms down until they encircled her waist. "Where have you been all my life?" he asked quietly.

"I've been right here. In the shadows. You just never noticed."

"I do now."

Helga nervously placed her hands on his shoulders. "W-What do you mean?"

Arnold smiled. "I lov-"

She shook her head, silencing him. "Don't tell me. Show me."

This surprised him a bit. "What does she want me to do, prove it?" he thought. "How do you prove that you love someone?" He suddenly thought back to a past dream he had had, where he had to ask that same question. "So what, am I supposed to kiss her? Well…if I love her, then I guess I should…" He tightened his grip on her and pulled her dangerously close to him.

"Arnold-," Helga started, then realized she had no idea what she was going to say. "Arnold, I…I love you," she said uncertainly.

"I know," he whispered. He leaned in closer to her.

She closed her eyes and waited.

He smiled at her and came in closer. "I can't believe I'm going to kiss Helga G. Pataki. And not to save my life or because it's in the heat of the moment, because I _want _to. Where on earth did I go wrong?" he thought. "Well, this is what Lila said, so I guess I should…Lila. I forgot all about her. But how? How could I forget about her? I love her. Wait, can I love her, and Helga too? Or does that mean I'm cheating? No, I love Helga. I've got to. I'm about to kiss her, so I'd better."

He came so near to her that their lips were almost touching. "Helga, I lo…I lov…"

"Yes?" Helga coaxed, her eyes still closed.

"I…I…I can't do this."

"Huh?" Helga opened her eyes in surprise.

"I can't do this," Arnold repeated, stepping away from her.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm sorry, Helga. I'm so sorry. I want to make you happy, but I can't."

"What are you talking about?" she asked, perplexed.

"I still love Lila."

"What?" she asked, not sure she had heard him correctly.

"I love Lila."

"You love…Lila…" Helga said slowly.

Arnold nodded.

"You love _LILA_?!"

"I'm sorry, Helga. I really am! It's just…"

"It's just what? What, football head, what is it?"

"It's just…that! I mean, Lila's been so nice to me, and you…well, you haven't."

"I already explained that once, Arnoldo!"

"See, there you go again! How could I love someone who's been my arch nemesis for practically my whole life?"

"So…so you don't love me," Helga whispered softly.

"No."

"B-but…I thought…did that kiss mean nothing to you?"  
"I just did that so you would be quiet," Arnold said, forcing himself to believe it.

"Oh."

"I think we just took things too far."

"Yeah."

"_I _took things too far," he continued. "I should never have lead you on like that."

"Uh-huh."

"We should probably just forget any of this ever happened."

"Okay."

"Yeah, well…we should probably get going."

"Right."

Arnold turned around to go.

"You said I deserved you," Helga said timidly.

He turned back to her. "What?"

"You said I deserved you," she repeated, staring at the ground.

"When was this?"

"After I found out who Golden Hero really was. You said that you were sorry Golden Hero wasn't who I wanted him to be and that you hoped he found me someday because…because I deserved him."

Arnold stared at her in shock. He didn't know what to say.

"Look, I-I don't care," Helga snapped. "Just go. Crawl back to your precious _Li-la_." She said the name as if it were a curse. "I was stupid to think you could ever love me. I should have known better. It's all my fault."

"No, it's not, Helg-"

"Go. Just go!" she screamed.

Arnold looked at her one last time before he turned around and ran. Helga watched him until he was out of sight.


	60. Heartbreaking

**Chapter 60**

**Heartbreaking**

Helga expected to burst into tears, but she didn't. She didn't have the strength to cry. Or do anything else for that matter.

She'd been rejected. The one thing she had always feared. The one thing that had kept her secret a secret. Fear of rejection.

She used to have nightmares about being rejected. Horrible nightmares. But she had always woken up before things got too bad. She had never thought about what life would be like afterwards. But now, she was living her nightmare.

She felt like someone had taken a sword and run it through her heart. Her heart was broken without any hope of repair, and she was sure that nothing could ever fill up the emptiness. Everything she had lived for, everything she had ever dreamed of becoming, everything that she was, had just been destroyed by a few words.

* * *

Helga stood in the exact same spot for almost a half an hour before she started to walk, almost subconsciously, out of the field, in the opposite direction of Arnold. She eventually came to a road. She caught a bus and sat motionless for two hours before it dropped her off by her house. She walked up the steps of her house, opened the door, and stepped inside.

Inside was quite an interesting scene. Her older sister, Olga, was sitting on the floor crying her eyes out. Her mother was screaming something into the phone, and her father was nowhere to be seen, but judging from the racket coming from the television in the next room, it was pretty easy to figure out where he was.

Helga quietly closed the door, hoping not to make a scene. Sadly, that was not the case.

Olga glanced up. "Helga!" she squealed, jumping up and running to her. She hugged her tightly, then grabbed her hand and pulled her over to Miriam.

"Mummy! Look! Helga's come home!" she cried, her voice attempting to break the sound barrier.

"In a minute, Olga," Miriam muttered, before returning to the phone. "You listen here, Mister! You can't expect me to stand here listening to you tell me that the helicopter is off the radar! My little girl is out there! Go send someone-"

"But, Mummy, Helga's right here!" Olga exclaimed.

Miriam glanced at Helga. "Sorry, I have to go," she said slowly, hanging up the phone. She stared at Helga in disbelief.

"Um…hi," Helga said without feeling.

"Helga! Where have you been?" her mother asked in a daze, bending down to give her a quick hug.

"An island."

"Oh, that's nice. What happened to the helicopter?"

"Crashed."

"Are you hurt?" she inquired.

"No."

"Well…it's nice to have you back, Helga," she said, uncertainly. Talking with her daughter wasn't something that she had much experience with. "We were worried."

"Oh, I just missed you so much, Baby Sister!" Olga cried out, her high, annoying voice completely contrasting to her mother's hesitant one.

"Oh." Helga didn't have time for this. She didn't care what her so-called 'family' had to say to her. She just wanted to be alone.

"How on earth did you survive out there all by yourself?" Olga asked.

"I wasn't alone."

"Oh? Who were you with?"

"A-a boy," Helga said softly, hoping they couldn't hear the tremor in her voice.

"A boy?" Olga cried in shock.

"Yes."

"From your class?"

"Uh-huh."

"What's his name?"

"Arnold." Did they not realize how much it hurt her to even utter his name?

"Where is he?"

"Don't know."

"Is he home?"

"Probably."

"Well, that's good. We wouldn't want your little friend Arnold-"

"Alfred?" her father asked, stepping into the hall. "Why are you talking about the orphan boy?"

"Helga was on an island with him! That's where she's been all this time," Olga explained, seeming bent on getting Helga in some sort of trouble. It worked.

"What were you doing with _him _on an _island_?" Bob bellowed.

"It's not like I planned it."

"You shouldn't be associating with people like him, Olga. Think of what it would do to the Pataki name if my daughter was friends with an orphan!"

Helga just glared at him.

"Now Daddy, it's not Alfred's fault he has no parents."

Bob looked at Helga quizzically. "You didn't do anything with him, did you?"

"What's it to you?" Helga snapped.

"Hey! Don't take that tone with me, missy! Just answer the question!"

"I-I don't want to talk about it."

"Give the girl a break, Bee," Miriam said, coming to the rescue. "She's been through a lot. She needs rest."

"Good idea," he stated, too lazy at the moment to come up with a better plan. "Go to bed, Olga."

"But Daddy, I'm not tired!" Olga protested.

"Not you, the girl. And you should go to bed too; it's almost one in the morning!"

"Really?" Olga asked in amazement. "I must have been so worried, I didn't notice."

Helga quietly snuck past them and climbed the stairs. She stepped into her room and shut the door. She stood in the pitch blackness, trying to collect herself.

"Come on, Helga," she said out loud. Her voice sounded hollow and distant in the empty room. "It's not the end of the world." Yeah, right. "It could be worse." How? "I-it's not that bad." Her voice started to crack. "So what if he d-doesn't l-love me? Big deal. I-I can live without him. I-I…" Helga ran over to her bed and threw herself facedown on it, sobbing hysterically. "Why?" she screamed. "Why did he have to do that?"

"Helga? Are you okay?" her mother's voice came from the other side of the door.

Helga sat up. "I-I'm fine, Miriam! Criminy!"

"Oh…okay. Goodnight, dear."

Helga waited for her mother's footsteps to die away.

"This is stupid," she said to herself. "Crying won't get me anywhere. I-I just need to write something." She pulled out her poetry book and read the last poem. "_And by your kiss you've shown true love. I'm yours forever, my own true love._ I sound so happy," she thought sadly. "Well, that just goes to show how cruel the world can be." She began to write.

_**H**__e broke my heart,_

_**E**__very piece shattered._

_**A**__ll I wanted was his love,_

_**R**__eal as he promised._

_**T**__rue was mine for him,_

_**B**__ut he left me,_

_**R**__ight in the middle of paradise._

_**E**__very piece of my heart_

_**A**__ches for his love._

_**K**__indling the fire,_

_**I**__ will wait by the light,_

_**N**__ever losing hope._

_**G**__rief will be my only comfort. _


	61. Follow Your Heart

**Chapter 61**

**Follow Your Heart**

Arnold thanked the lady who had given him a ride back home and then stepped inside the boarding house.

"I'm home!" he called to no one in particular.

Everything was silent. Then suddenly his grandmother, who was dressed in a cowgirl skirt and princess hat, came riding in on top of Arnold's pet pig, Abner.

"Heel, Prince Almanzo, heel!" she cried.

Abner ran up to Arnold and almost knocked him over.

"Hey, boy!" Arnold said, reaching down to pet him.

"Kimba! You're home!" his grandmother exclaimed.

"Yeah, I'm back, Grandma!"

"Oh, that's wonderful! We must inform Prince Phillip!"

"Um…yeah," Arnold said, deciding it was best to just go along with it. "Where is Grandpa anyway?"

"Why Prince Phillip is in the food court! He must replenish his strength for the war."

"The…war?" Arnold asked uncertainly.

"The war against Aquaman and the British, of course!"

"Oh…sure, Grandma," he said, as he turned to go find 'Prince Phillip'.

"Now just a minute, Kimba," his grandmother called to him, "you never told me of your travels!"

"Oh, right." He decided to give her a shortened version of the story, since he had some questions he really needed to ask his grandfather. "Well, I was stranded on an island with Helga-"

"You were with Lady Eleanor?" his grandmother said, with a slight gleam in her eyes.

"Lady Eleanor?"

"Why, yes! Eleanor Roosevelt! She stopped by to have breakfast once."

"Um…right. Breakfast."

"So what did you and Eleanor do on this island?" she inquired.

"It's kind of a long story," Arnold said impatiently.

"Oh, I see. Did you have a good time?"

"You could say that…I think."

She smiled at him knowingly.

Arnold turned to go once again but then turned back. "Hey, Grandma? Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course, Kimba."

"When you were nine, did you really lock Grandpa in a warehouse and tell him that you loved him?"

"Well…I…why do you ask?" his grandmother said, suddenly becoming very nervous.

"Because the same thing sort of happened to me, and I was wondering if you could give me some advice."

"Why certainly! When tracking down prey, make sure to always carry a spare tire."

"I meant about Helga."

"Is Lady Eleanor going hunting?"

"No," Arnold said, beginning to think it was too much work to get any advice out of her, "she's the one who loves me."

"Oh?...Oh! She does?"

Arnold nodded.

"And how do you feel about her?"

Arnold sighed. "I don't know. I thought I loved her, but then I realized that I loved this other girl, so I guess I dumped Helga."

"Oh. I see," his grandmother said, unable to hide the disappointment in her voice.

"But I feel really bad about it," Arnold continued. "I mean, Helga's loved me in secret since she was _three_, and when she finally tells me, I reject her. I want to make her happy, but I don't know how I can unless I love her too, which I don't. What do you think I should do?"

"Arnold, listen to me," she said slowly. "I can't tell you what to do, but if you follow your heart, you'll make the right decision."

"But what if-"

"Now be gone!" she suddenly exclaimed. "I must go warn the villagers of the upcoming battle! We must all stock up on cheese so as not to fail!"

"Sure, Grandma. Goodnight."

Arnold walked down the hall towards the kitchen, pondering over the strange piece of advice.

"Follow your heart?" he questioned. "What's that supposed to mean? Leave it to Grandma to think up advice that doesn't make any sense… Oh, well. Maybe Grandpa can give me some advice."

He walked into the kitchen and found his grandfather sitting at the kitchen table eating a sandwich.

"Hey, Grandpa."

Oh, hello, short man," his grandfather said, without even looking up. "I see I'm having another one of those hallucination things."

"Huh?"

"I think you're standing right there in front of me, but I know that you're really flying in a helicopter thousands of miles away from here."

"Actually, the helicopter crashed," Arnold explained. "We had to jump out."

"We?"

"Helga and I."

"You mean your little girlfriend with the pink bow?" he asked in astonishment.

"She's not my girlfriend!"

"Oh, what does it matter anyway? You're just a hallucination," his grandfather persisted.

"Grandpa, I'm _not _a hallucination."

"Oh, really? Prove it."

Arnold sighed. "I've had enough of 'proving things' for one day. Could you just believe me?"

"Fine, fine, have it your way."

"Right. So, I wanted to ask you-"

"Oh, my word, Arnold, you're back!" his grandfather suddenly exclaimed, throwing his arms around Arnold. "I thought I'd never see you again!"

"Grandpa!"

"Alright, alright, what's on your mind? Wait, where were you in the first place?"

"I was on a deserted island."

"A deserted island, aye?"

"Yeah."

"How the heck did you get there?!"

"On a raft."

"So…you were alone with that girl, on an island, for a whole week?" he said slowly.

"Basically."

"Holy squirrel-cages!" his grandfather exclaimed. "Well, you can't say I didn't warn ya."

"What do you mean?" Arnold asked.

"You can't expect me to believe that _nothing _happened between you two."

"I never said nothing happened."

"You mean…oh, my gosh! Arnold, you poor boy! Well, at least it's over."

"Huh?" Arnold asked, confused.

"She confessed her love for you, didn't she?"

"Yeah…"

"Ha! I told you! You owe me ten bucks!"

"_Grandpa_," Arnold said, annoyed.

"Just kidding. So, are you two an item now?"

"NO!" Arnold exclaimed.

"No?"

"_She _loves _me_. I don't love her back."

"_What_?! Why not?!"

"Because I love someone else," Arnold said.

"So?"

"So, if I loved both of them, wouldn't that be cheating?"

"Sure, but who cares about that?"

"Helga would," Arnold said.

"True…"

Arnold sighed. "I don't know _what _to do."

"Uh oh. I sense one of your highly complex boyhood problems that don't normally happen to people until they're in seventh grade. Well, let me hear it."

"Okay, you see-"

"That girl told you that she loved you," his grandfather interrupted, "and you didn't know what to think. Then you two were in danger, and she started screaming, so you kissed her to shut her up."

"How'd you know that?" Arnold asked in astonishment.

"Lucky guess?" He shrugged. "Anyway, then, when you guys were safe, all you could think about was her and that kiss."

"Obviously."

"And then you were afraid that you were falling in love with her, but you still weren't really sure, but she led you to believe that you _did _love her."

"Right-"

"But _then_," his grandfather interrupted once again, "you realized that you still loved this other girl, so you dumped Haley."

"Helga."

"But now you realize the error of your ways, and you want to make it up to her, but you don't know how you could possibly make things better, unless you loved her back!"

"Exactly! What should I do?" Arnold questioned.

"I'll tell you, Arnold…" his grandfather thought for a moment. "I have _no _idea."

Arnold sighed. "Grandma says I should 'follow my heart'."

"What the heck does that mean?"

"I don't know."

"Gertie was always a hopeless romantic; always spouting off some sort of pathetic poetry. I never could understand half the junk she said."

"Well, do you think you could give me some advice that makes

sense?" Arnold asked.

"I'll give you the same advice my father gave me…" He paused

dramatically. "Never eat raspberries!"

Arnold rolled his eyes.

"Sorry, Arnold, gotta go!" his grandfather exclaimed, running from the room.

"That sure helped," Arnold said sarcastically. "I guess I'll just leave this as it is. I'll love Lila, Helga will love me, Lila will love…well, _hopefully _me." He sighed. "Nothing will change," he said slowly, with just a hint of disappointment in his voice but from what he couldn't tell.


	62. What now?

**Chapter 62**

**What now?**

Helga awoke with a start. She glanced at her clock.

"Seven fifteen," she muttered. "I must have fallen asleep."

She sat up, and her poetry book fell to the floor. She picked it up numbly and put it in her pocket. Then she crossed the floor and opened the door to her closet. She stopped short at the sight of her shrine.

"So…" she slowly spoke to it, "I guess this is as close as I'll ever get to you, huh? A monument in my closet. Gee, _that's _a good soul mate."

Helga quickly shut the closet door and then went downstairs. She walked into the kitchen and found her mother asleep at the table.

"Hey, Miriam!" she exclaimed, shaking her. "What day is it?"

"Huh…what? Oh, it's, um…" Her mother trailed off, as she dropped off to sleep again.

"Miriam!"

"Wha…? Um…go ask Olga…"

"Why do I even bother communicating with these people?" Helga muttered under her breath, as she climbed the stairs. She burst into her sister's room without bothering to knock.

Olga was sitting at her vanity, working on her hair, but she looked up when Helga came into the room.

"Good morning, Baby Sister!" Olga chirped. "How are you this morning?"

"Depressed and heartbroken. How are _you_?" Helga said sarcastically.

"I'm doing simply wonderful, now that I'm back home!"

"For good?" Helga asked worriedly.

"No, silly! I'll be going back to Alaska at the end of this week. I just had to come back to make sure that you were okay. Now, what did you say about being heartbroken?"

"None of your business," Helga snapped.

"Oh…okay then. Well, you know if you ever need to talk about anything-"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. I don't need your sympathy."

"Well…if you're alright…"

Helga sighed. "I'm fine."

"Oh, goody!" Olga exclaimed, once again her chipper self. "In that case, I'll go check on breakfast. I'm making a triple-decker Pavlova and this delicious bread I learned about when I visited Thailand!"

"Great!" Helga said, faking excitement. "Oh, and one more thing. What day is it?"

"It's Monday, silly! And you'd better get ready or you're going to be late for school."

"Criminy!" Helga exclaimed. "I can't go to school! Arn-"

Olga looked at her suspiciously.

"Arn…aren't you going to go check on breakfast?" Helga said nervously.

"Oh, that's right! I'll see you later!" Olga cried, as she rushed out the door.

"Phew, that was close." Helga fell backwards onto Olga's bed. "I can't believe today's Monday! I can't face Arnold! And what about Lila? She'll jump all over him…and he'll jump right back! Oh, what did I do to deserve this?"

She sat up and caught sight of herself in the mirror. She was a little confused for a moment as to why her hair was down, but she quickly remembered. Arnold finding out that she was Cecile, the kiss, her confession, the kiss in the cave, thinking he loved her, finding out he didn't; everything came flooding back to her.

"He said it looked good down," Helga thought sadly. Her eyes filled with tears, but she held them back. "What does that matter anyway? He doesn't love me. I doubt he even likes me." With that, she walked over to the mirror, grabbed Olga's brush and tied her hair back into pigtails.

"I'll just have to pretend that nothing happened," she told herself. "It's not like _he'll _say anything about it. But…I almost wish he would."

Helga walked downstairs and headed for the front door.

"I'm going to school now!" she called to anyone who would listen. She got no response, but she was used to it. She closed the door and started the two blocks to school.


	63. Back to School

**Chapter 63**

**Back to School**

Everything had dried up tremendously from the flood; in fact, now the sun was shining brightly, and there was hardly a cloud in the sky. Helga walked slowly, trying to put off the moment when she saw Arnold for as long as possible.

When she finally got to P.S.118 she saw that it was in a lot worse shape than the rest of the city. Although it wasn't exactly wet anymore, there were severe water stains, and the building looked like it might collapse at any second. No one was around, so she figured she was either really early or really late. Of course, there was always the chance that the other students hadn't survived the flood…

When she walked inside, it was like walking into a sauna. The school seemed to be one hundred degrees inside. The hallway was empty, so she took her time walking to the classroom. When she got to the door she said a silent prayer that Arnold wasn't there and went inside.

It turned out that she was early; therefore, there were only two people in the classroom. Phoebe and Lila. Phoebe, being the brainiac that she was, wanted to make sure she didn't miss a thing, and Lila…Lila just thought it would be the 'perfect' thing to do.

"Helga?" Phoebe asked, uncertain of herself.

Helga merely nodded.

"Helga!" Phoebe exclaimed, jumping out of her seat to hug her best friend.

"Hey, Pheebs," Helga said with as much enthusiasm as she could muster.

"Oh, Helga! I'm so happy to see you! But, but I thought you and Arnold drowned? How on earth-"

"Cool it, Pheebs, I didn't drowned. I half expected you to though."

"Oh, no, Gerald and I used Arnold's plan of escape to direct all the other kids to the roof of the school," Phoebe explained. "Everyone's fine."

"Oh…well, that's good," Helga said, expressionless.

"But wait, where's Arnold? Is he okay?"

"Yes, wherever is Arnold?" Lila said, faking concern.

"What's it to you?" Helga snapped at Lila.

"Is it too much to ask to inquire about the boy I love?"

"_Love_?!" Phoebe exclaimed.

"Yes, love! Oh, I just love him ever so much! I do hope he is alright so that I can tell him how deeply I feel about him!"

Phoebe cast a worried look at Helga.

"Shut up, please, just shut up," Helga thought miserably.

Lila, her business done, turned on her heel and walked back to her seat.

"Um, Helga, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, Phoebe," Helga said sadly.

"It's not…Ice Cream, is it?" Phoebe asked, using a code name they had made for Arnold, so no one knew they were talking about him.

"Kinda."

Phoebe sat down in a desk at the back of the room, and Helga sat in the desk next to her. Phoebe glanced at Lila, who was now reading a book.

"Lila's not listening," Phoebe whispered. "Tell me."

Helga took a deep breath. "I've been rejected."

"Huh?"

"I've been rejected, Pheebs. I poured my soul out to him, and he didn't even care. He's still in love with Lila."

Phoebe gasped. "Oh, Helga, that's awful! I'm so sorry! I-I don't know what to say!"

"There's nothing to say, Phoebe. My sole reason for living has been taken from me."

"Helga, I-"

"Shh! People are coming in!" Helga whispered urgently, as Stinky, Rhonda, and Sheena walked into the classroom.

"Phoebe, this conversation never happened."

"Right. Forgetting!"

"Why, Helga, I didn't expect to ever see you again!" Stinky exclaimed.

"Yeah, Helga, you're supposed to be dead. What gives?"

"Well, you almost died too, Princess, so why don't you just shut up about it?" Helga snapped at Rhonda.

"Fine!" Rhonda sniffed, sticking her nose in the air.

"But how did you survive?" Sheena asked.

"Yeah, on account of Lila bein' a dang murderer and all."

"Oh, Stinky, I'm ever so sure I had no intention of pushing Helga out that window!" Lila said sweetly. "I was simply trying to prevent her from attacking Arnold when I pushed her. She must have just ever so lost her balance."

Helga glared at her. "I wasn't attacking him! I was…"

"Oh, go on! Do tell us what you were going to do. We're ever so dying to know…"


	64. Rumors

**Chapter 64**

**Rumors**

"Good morning, class!" Mr. Simmons suddenly cried, stepping into the room. "It's so wonderful to see all of your bright and chipper faces on this wonderful d-Helga! Oh, my stars, what are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same question," Helga retorted.

"Oh, me? Well, I took your advice and climbed through the ventilation system to the roof. And the children apparently followed Arnold's advice of climbing up a jump rope that some troublemaker tied to the roof."

"Oh," Helga said, uninterested.

"Well, we're all fine, but what about you? How on earth did you manage to survive?"

By this time everyone was in the room except for Harold, Brainy, and Arnold.

"Yeah, how'd you make?"

"I thought you drowned!"

Helga sighed. "Look, you morons, we floated on a raft to an island, and then some people rescued us. No big deal."

"We? You mean Arnold was with you?"

As if on cue, Arnold suddenly walked through the door.

"Howdy, Arnold! We were just talkin' about you!" Stinky exclaimed.

"Hey, Stinky! Hey, everyone!" Arnold said.

"Arnold! You're alive!"

"You and Helga both made it!"

Arnold glanced at Helga, but she was 'reading' a book, pretending to be completely oblivious to what was going on.

"Yeah, we did," Arnold said, still looking at her. "Barley though."

"Really?"  
"What happened?"

Everyone crowded around him and started asking questions.

"Where'd you go?"

"How'd you get there?"

"Did you starve?"

"Did Helga try to kill you?"

"Are you mad at Lila for pushing Helga?"

"Where'd you sleep?"

"Did you sleep _together_?"

"Ooh!"

Suddenly, Harold burst through the door. "Sorry I'm late, Mr. Simmons; I was busy eatin-Arnold? Helga? Hey, you guys are supposed to be dead! Awe, by brain hurts!"

Everyone except for Arnold, Helga, and Mr. Simmons turned to him.

"Shut up!"

"Madam Fortress Mommy!"

"We're listening to Arnold!"

"Yeah! Lila was starving-"

"And then she slept with something-"

"And Helga was mad that the thing pushed Arnold-"

"So she killed a chicken!"

This last remark came, or course, from Curly.

"Chicken?" Harold repeated. "I want some chicken! I'm so hungry I could eat a horse!"

"The chicken was a horse?"

"I thought the chicken was dead!"

"Yeah! Helga killed the chicken!"

"Or was it a horse?"

"Did she kill it so they wouldn't starve?"

"I want a chicken!"

"Did Lila eat the horse?"

"No, Helga killed the chicken!"

"Then who ate the chicken?"

"It was a horse!"

"But who ate it?"

"Arnold ate the chicken!"

"The one that Helga killed?"

"Yeah! Helga killed a chicken and gave it to Arnold!"

"Why would Helga give Arnold a chicken?"

"Or a horse?"

"Who knows? Maybe she likes him!"

"Yeah! So she gave him a chicken so he wouldn't starve!"  
"Helga likes Arnold?!"  
"Yeah!"

"So _this _is how rumors get started," Helga thought.

"Is it true, Arnold?"

"Yeah, did Helga give you a chicken?"

"No, not that! Is it true that she likes you?"

Helga put her head on her desk, wishing that the earth would swallow her whole.

"Yeah! Does she?"

Everyone was looking at Arnold in anticipation.

"Um…" He glanced at Helga and then back to them. He knew he couldn't tell. She'd trusted him with the biggest secret in her life, and he couldn't let her down. He'd done that enough already.

"Okay, we're not gonna get anything out of him," Sid said, once it was clear that Arnold wasn't going to respond.

"Why don't we just ask Helga?"

"Oh, yeah! Why didn't I think of that?"

"Cause you're a moron!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not!"

"Shut up!"

"Hey, Helga!" Sid shouted, "Do you like Arnold?"

The room was suddenly very quiet.

"Yes, Helga! Do tell! Is there something ever so important that you've been keeping from us for an ever so long time?" Lila asked sweetly.

"Can it, Princess," Helga said harshly.

"That must mean she _does _like him!"

"Otherwise, she would have denied it!"

"_Arnold_ and _Helga_?!" Rhonda exclaimed. "How can that be? They're complete opposites! They hate each other!"

"Well, it is a scientifically proven fact that opposites attract."

"Phoebe!" Helga shouted in dismay.

"I reckon that should mean that Arnold likes her too!"

"Yeah! It does!"

"No, he doesn't! There's no way he could like _Helga_," Gerald immediately said.

Arnold just glared at him.

"So, Arnold, do you like Helga back?"

"Not again," Helga thought. "I don't want to hear him say it again."

"Well, I…"


	65. Generator

**Chapter 65**

**Generator **

"Now, people, settle down and take your seats!" Mr. Simmons shouted, interrupting Arnold. "I'm sure Arnold and Helga will tell you all about their 'special' adventure at _recess_."

The class groaned and reluctantly sat down. Arnold sat as far away as he could from Helga; in the front of the room, all the way on the left side.

"Okay. First of all, I would like to apologize for the heat," Mr. Simmons continued. "I know it must be terribly uncomfortable for you children, but there is nothing we can do about it for the time being. We needed to somehow evaporate all the water from the flood, but apparently using the heating generator wasn't the best idea. Now it's stuck."

"When will it be fixed? The heat is wrinkling my shirt!" Rhonda cried.

"Everyone is afraid that if someone messes with it, the generator might explode."

"Then why the heck are we at school?" Sid asked.

"What, and disrupt your special education?" Mr. Simmons gasped, clearly shocked.

"So, it's gonna stay like this?"

"Well…"

Suddenly, the door burst open, and Brainy stepped into the room, followed by two men in army uniforms.

"Gee whiz! It's hotter than blazes in here!" one of the men exclaimed.

"I'm very sorry, Mr. …" the other man started.

"Simmons."

"Mr. Simmons, for interrupting your class, but we thought it best to bring Brainy back."

"This young man has been a great help in tracking down the whereabouts of the Darling children. Apparently the two boys were fine, but the girl…um…how do I put this…died?"

"Oh! How 'special'!"

"Um…yes. Oh! You're the kids we helped rescue!" one of them said, as he noticed Arnold and Helga.

"Oh, yeah! I remember you guys! Hey, do you know what happened to James and Jack? They never returned to base after they flew you home."

"Oh, those guys? Um…well, the helicopter sort of-" Arnold began.

"I'm sure they're just a little behind schedule," Mr. Simmons offered. "Now, we're really quite busy, so if you could just…"

"Oh! Oh, of course! Once again, sorry for interrupting your class."

"Yes, we'll be on our way now," the other man said. Turning to Brainy, he said, "Thank you again, son."

"Oh, and good luck with that chick", the other said, winking.

"Oh, please," Helga muttered under her breath.

The two men quickly saluted and left the room.

* * *

"You wanna go play poker?"

"But…we're on duty," the other man answered.

"Yeah? Well, who says we can't take a break?"

"Hmm…you've got a point. Let's at least get out of this blamed building before I roast!"

"Hey, hey, hey, wait a minute! I have an even better idea!" the other man exclaimed.

"Get out of this building and _then _go play poker?"

"No! We should try to do something nice for that asthma kid, for helping us out."

"We should?"

"Of course!" Then he whispered, "Listen, Frank, this way, if we ever need his help again, he'll be so grateful that he won't ask to be paid!"

"Oh! I get it! But what can we do?"

"Easy! We'll just get the air conditioner fixed! That way we'll be helping him, and, if we're lucky, the school board will reward us for our efforts!"

"Hank, you're a genius!"

"I know," Hank said smugly.

The two men wandered through the school until they found a closet. They stepped inside and were looking at a large machine that nobody but a pro-mechanic could possibly figure out.

"So…how do you work it?"

"Oh, that's easy! My brother-in-law's a mechanic. I've watched him fix his air-coding-device-thingy loads of times!"

"Really?"

"Well…once," Hank admitted.

"Works for me!"

Three pulled wires, two flipped switches, and a whole lot of lost confidence later, Hank and Frank left the room.

"Do you think it's fixed, Hank?"

"I'm…of course!" Hank lied. "'Fixing' is my middle name!"

"Great! You wanna play poker now?"

"Duh! I'm think one who suggested it in the first place!"


	66. A Plus

**Chapter 66**

**A Plus**

"Ahem! Attention, students!" Mr. Simmons waited until the class had more or less quieted down and then continued. "Now that that 'special' interruption is over, it's time to pass back your 'special' projects from last week!"

"Do you mean those retarded family projects?" Rhonda asked.

"Right you are, Rhonda! Those retar-er…'special' family projects!" Mr. Simmons took a stack of papers off his desk and began passing them around. "Rhonda, Curly, B plus."

"B plus?!" Rhonda exclaimed. "Rhonda Wellington Lloyd doesn't make B's."

"Well, I'm sorry, Rhonda, but that's your grade."

Rhonda turned her nose up disapprovingly and then glared at Curly. "This is all your fault, you little creep!"

"But, sugar, I thought you loved me!"

"Yeah, right, like I'd ever like a weirdo like you! I just said all that stuff in the flood because…because I-"

"Quiet please," Mr. Simmons silenced her. "Patty and Harold, D minus."

"All right! I didn't fail!" Harold cheered.

"Gerald and Phoebe, A."

The two smiled at one another and then quickly turned away.

"Lila, Brainy, F minus."

"F minus?! I'm ever so sure you made a mistake Mr. Simmons," Lila said, her sweet façade disappearing momentarily.

"No, Lila, I did not make a mistake, and frankly, I'm disappointed in you. You always make such good grades! What happened?"

"Oh, I'm ever so sure it was all Brainy's fault," she said kindly, her venom dripping with honey. "After all, Brainy is ever so not very bright."

"_That_, Miss Sawyer, is quite enough. I want you to apologize to Brainy right now."

"Okay." Lila turned in her seat to look at Brainy. "I'm ever so sorry you're not very bright."

"Okay, that's it!" Mr. Simmons said, trying to figure out where his star pupil had gone. "I'm sorry, Lila, but I'm going to have to give you detention."

The entire class gasped. _Lila _got _detention_? Was it even possible to use those words in the same sentence?  
"Detention?" Lila gasped.

"That's right, detention. There will be no more discussion about it."

Arnold looked at Lila, a bit shocked. He had never known her to get in trouble before. She always just seemed so…perfect.

"But everyone makes mistakes," he reminded himself. "She's still perfect to me." Lila continued to argue with Mr. Simmons, while the entire class talked in excited whispers. "Okay, so maybe she's just having a bad day. That happens to everyone. I mean, Helga's probably having the worst day in her life." He sighed. "And it's all because of me." He turned around and looked across the room at Helga and was surprised to find her scribbling frantically in her poetry book. "Wow. She's not gonna give up easily, is she?"

Mr. Simmons finished passing out the rest of the grades, until the only one left was Arnold and Helga's.

"Arnold, Helga, congratulations! You get an A plus!"

"An A plus?!" Lila shrieked. "How could _she _get an A, while _I _get an F?"

"Well, you're project was lacking the creativity and teamwork that was required," Mr. Simmons explained. "In fact, some of the questions you left blank."

"Well…yeah…but how could they do any better? And not just a D or something, but an A plus?! I'm sure that's just ever so not fair."  
"Helga and Arnold showed a tremendous amount of cooperation and understanding. I was actually quite surprised that they did so well considering that they…well…don't tend to get along most of the time. But actually, if they ever were to get wedded, it might be a very successful marriage! It just goes to show that-"

"Arnold and Helga sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes love, then comes-"

"_Shut up_! I do not have a crush on Helga!"

The room was suddenly very quiet. Helga immediately stopped writing and looked at Arnold in shock. She couldn't believe that he had said it. Sure, she had heard it before, but at least then he had _tried _to be understanding. At least he had felt bad about it. But now, now he didn't care at all. He had said it so firmly, so coldly. He almost sounded like he was mad at her.


	67. You Don't See Me

**Chapter 67**

**You Don't See Me**

Math and social studies dragged by. Helga sat motionless, staring straight ahead at nothing. She didn't even attempt to concentrate on the lesson; she knew she couldn't.

"Okay, who can tell me what an ecosystem is? Helga?"

Helga continued to stare off into space.

"Helga? Helga!"

"What?" she muttered.

"Do you know what an ecosystem is?" Mr. Simmons asked again.

"No."

"Helga, you're not acting like yourself. Would you like to see the nurse?"

"No. I'm fine."

"Well, okay. If you're sure. Can anyone else tell me what an-"

"My contact!" Rhonda suddenly cried. "I've lost my contact lens! Oh, I can't see a thing!"

"Would you like to move up to the front of the room, Rhonda?" Mr. Simmons asked.

"Okay, but just for today. I'll just have my father buy me _new _contacts when I get home."

"How 'special'. Will anyone in the front row trade seats with Rhonda for a day?"

Arnold, always ready to help someone out, immediately raised his hand.

"Thank you, Arnold, that was very generous of you," Mr. Simmons said.

Arnold stood up to switch seats. He turned around and stopped in his tracks. "Doesn't it just figure," he thought. "Rhonda's sitting right next to Helga."

Helga looked up for half an instant, just long enough for her to catch his stare. She quickly looked away and instead studied the top of her desk. "I hope he didn't see me," she thought worriedly.

"At least she's acknowledged my presence. But is that a good thing? Do I really have to do this?" But he concluded that he _did _have to, so as not to arise suspicion. He slowly walked down the aisle, feeling like he was walking down death row.

Helga could feel his eyes on her the entire time, but she dared not look up. "Hurry up, football head!" she thought desperately. "Sit in the seat, and get on with your life!"

"How am I going to survive sitting across from her all day?" Arnold thought. He was so caught up in his thoughts that he barley had time to catch himself after he tripped. He hastily grabbed onto Helga's arm to keep from falling. Her head snapped up, and her eyes immediately were drawn to his.

For a few seconds neither one of them spoke. Then Arnold quickly let her go, mumbled "Sorry", and sat down, wondering why on earth he had done that.

"'Sorry'?" Helga wondered. "For what? Bumping into me…or rejecting me?" Her skin burned where he had touched her. Why had he done that? To keep from falling, yes, but couldn't he had just as easily grabbed onto the desk? And why had he looked at her for so long? "Who cares?" she thought. "It's no use having false hope anymore. He made it quite clear that we can never be together." She sadly opened her poetry book for the umpteenth time that day and began to write.

_This is the place where I sit._

_This is the part where I love you too much._

_Is this as hard as it gets?_

_Cause I'm getting tired of pretending I'm tough._

_I'm here if you want me._

_I'm yours, you can hold me._

_I'm empty and aching_

_and tumbling and breaking._

_Cause you don't see me,_

_and you don't need me,_

_and you don't love me_

_the way I wish you would;_

_the way I know you could._

_I dream a world where you'd understand,_

_but I dream a million sleepless nights._

_I dream of fire when you're touching me hand,_

_but it twists into smoke when I turn on the light._

_I'm speechless and faded._

_It's too complicated._

_Is this how the book ends,_

_not even good friends?_

_This is the place in my heart._

_This is the place where I'm falling apart._

_I wish this was just where we met_

_cause that was the last chance that I'll ever get._

_I wish I was lonely _

_instead of just only _

_crystal and see through _

_and not enough to you. _

She would have gone on feeling sorry for herself, if it wasn't for the fact that the fire alarm rang.


	68. Blazing Flames

**Chapter 68**

**Blazing Flames**

Mr. Simmons stopped mid-sentence and looked up in surprise at the sound of the fire alarm. "Oh! Oh, my word! A fire drill! Now, everyone, I want you to line up in a straight-"

"Fire!"

"Run for your life!"

"Ahh!"

Everyone jumped up and started running around the classroom. In the confusion, someone knocked Helga's poetry book off her desk and onto the floor. She crawled under her desk and was just about to get it, when Harold ran into her, slamming her into the wall. She felt a sharp pain where she had hit her head, before everything went dark.

"Children, please!" Mr. Simmons shouted. "Get in a line and…oh, why do I even bother?"

Lila struggled to make her way over to Arnold, still determined to put her scheme into action. "I ever so hope that Helga is watching," she thought.

"Arnold!" she cried. "Arnold, I lo-ow!" Lila exclaimed, as she tripped over a textbook, landing hard on her ankle. "Ow! Stupid book! That was ever so mean of you!" She tried to get up but found that she couldn't stand on her foot.

"This is ever so not what I need right now," she thought angrily. "A twisted ankle!"

"Please! Children!" Mr. Simmons tried again. "We have to get outside!"  
"FIRE!"

"It's just a drill!" Mr. Simmons shouted.

A few people looked up.

"A drill?"

"It's just a drill?"

"It's not real?"

"_Oh_."

The class began to calm down as they realized that there was no actual danger.

"What are we standing around in here for?" Curly exclaimed. He ran over to the door and opened it. "Ow! My hand!" he cried, letting go of the doorknob in alarm and jumping back.

Everyone stared in horror at the hallway outside the classroom, filled with blazing flames.

"RUN!" Mr. Simmons shouted.

Nobody needed to be told twice. Within seconds all the children, with the exception of Helga and Lila, were running like crazy, turning over desks and bumping into one another, trying desperately to make it to the door.

"Um…excuse me! Can someone please ever so help-" Lila stopped mid-sentence as someone pushed a desk on top of her. "-me," she muttered. She was about to push the desk off and try to crawl out of the school, when she noticed Helga, still unconscious, across the room. "Hmm…then again, I _could_ use some help," she thought, surveying the room for Arnold.

Meanwhile, Helga had finally come to. She opened her eyes just barley enough to catch what was going on.

Arnold was the last one out of the room. He was about to leave, when he noticed Helga on the other side of the room. Her eyes were wide with fear.

"Why didn't she leave?" he thought in a panic. He watched as she struggled to sit up but fell back down again. And suddenly, he didn't care about everything that had happened between them. He didn't care that she loved him, and he didn't love her back. The only thing that mattered was that she was danger, and he had to help her.

"What the heck's going on?" Helga thought. "Where is everybody? Did they all just leave me here?" She glanced wildly around the room, until she saw Arnold. "Arnold!" she thought happily. "He won't leave me here. He'll save me." Then she saw him look to his right and spot Lila. "Oh, no," she pleaded. "Please, no."

"Wait a minute, Lila too?" Arnold thought. He watched in horror, as the flames began to creep into the classroom. "I'll only have time to save one."


	69. Revelation

**Chapter 69**

**Revelation **

Arnold's first thought was of Lila. He felt guilty about it, but if it could only be one, then it was going to be the one he liked most. And that was _definitely _Lila.

He took a step toward Lila, but something made him turn and look back at Helga. She looked scared to death, and who wouldn't?

"But why would I choose her?" he thought. "She's treated me awful her whole life! And even if she loves me, Lila's been so much nicer to me! I mean, Helga's done nothing, and Lila's…" He had to stop at that. "Well, she's…for one thing she…um…" But try as he might, he couldn't think of one solitary nice thing that she had ever done for him. The only thing he could think of was her saying over and over again '_I don't like you like you, I just like you. I don't like you like you, I just like you_'.

"Okay, yeah, but it's not like Helga's ever done anything for me either. Well…I guess there was that time she found my hat. And the time that she helped me overthrow the Jolly Olly Man. And when she went with me to that haunted train station. And when she stopped Harold from killing me." Once he got started, he found that he couldn't stop. "She helped me get Gerald Field back from the adults and from Wolfgang. She was nice to me the whole time when we went camping. She lost on purpose so I could win the spelling bee, and she lost the place of class president for me, even if I didn't end up winning. She helped with that one trick when I did that magic show, and I guess she _somehow _got Mr. Hyun's daughter back for me. She went against her dad to help me save Mighty Pete, and then she jumped into my arms…" He blushed slightly at this, but was it because of her or the fire?

"Wow. Maybe I was wrong. She _has _done a lot. But Lila has to have done _something_."

"_I don't like you like you, I just like you_," a little voice in the back of his head taunted him.

"Oh, shut up. Okay, so maybe Lila hasn't done much of anything, but Helga couldn't have done _that _much more. Well, I guess she did save my life when we had to spend twenty-four hours together in that green house, and it flooded. And when I needed money for that parade float and for the skateboard ramp, she got her dad to donate it. And when she thought she was about to die she was really nice to me. I think she would have told me everything right then, if Phoebe hadn't interrupted. That was before I even liked Lila, wasn't it? I wonder what would have happened if Helga _had_ told me. I guess Lila sort of ruined everything for her… But even when Lila dumped me she was understanding. She even tried to get me and Lila back together, even if she _did _have us pretending to be boyfriend and girlfriend. And on then on Thanksgiving she spent the whole day with me and didn't once do anything mean. And then…of course, there was that whole Romeo and Juliet play." The fire was growing stronger, but he barley even noticed. "Our first kiss," he thought absentmindedly.

_I don't like you like you, I just like you._

"She invited me to dinner that one time," Arnold continued, trying to ignore the voice. "She was really nice to me towards the end of that egg project. She tried to apologize for everything her dad said during that parent's day tournament, even if I was a jerk and wouldn't listen. She always seems to follow my advice, even if she doesn't think it's any good. She was especially nice when she had amnesia, and when she was back to normal and found out that it was my fault, she didn't even get mad. And then, of course, there was spring break. She had been trying to help me that entire time, but I didn't even give her a chance. Well, at least it all worked out in the end. We even got to go on that Babewatch thing. Even if she _did _end up kissing me…"

Lila looked up at Arnold for the umpteenth time, wondering what the heck was taking him so long. "Why hasn't he saved me already?" she thought worriedly. "And why does he keep looking at Helga? He couldn't…no! Of course not. I'm ever so sure he'll choose me. I mean, what on earth has _she _ever done for him?"

"And when she tried to break away," Arnold thought in amazement, "I didn't let her. Why on earth did I do that? Maybe I was just too caught up in the heat of the moment, or maybe I was just trying to be professional, or maybe…maybe I didn't want it to end." He quickly shook his head. "The smoke must be getting to me. I've got to get out of here! But…who should I take? I mean, I like Helga, but I _love _Lila. Don't I? I mean, why else would I hang out with Helga the entire time we were at Rhonda's costume party, when she had dressed up as Lila? Okay, so maybe she didn't act much like Lila, except for saying 'ever so' all the time, so I guess I liked her just for being…herself. Besides, it's annoying how Lila is constantly saying 'ever so'."

_I don't like you like you, I just like you._

"'Ever so'. What's that even mean? Why doesn't she just say 'very' like everyone else? Why does the always feel like she has to be different?"

_I don't like you like you, I just like you._

"And not only different, _perfect_. Why is she always so faultless? Doesn't she know that people make mistakes? No one can be that perfect all the time, not even her! Why does she pretend?"

_I don't like you like you, I just like you._

"It's not like she acts perfect to help anyone. If anything, the opposite. She's more fashionable than Rhonda, smarter than Phoebe; she's everything that everyone wants to be! But she doesn't keep it to herself; she has to go around flaunting it in other people's faces. It's like she lives off their jealousy."

_I don't like you like you, I just like you._

"Why did she never give me the time of day? If she would have just said 'Stop' I would understand. But she didn't; she allowed me to continue showering her with affection, attending to her every will and need, treating me like her slave! Was I worth anything to her other than a servant?"

_I don't like you like you, I just like you._

"Or even worse, she'd play at love. Telling me one thing and then going back on her word. Giving me hope and then snatching it away. Always trying to make me miserable. Did she not know how much I loved her? Did she not care? Was she too preoccupied with herself to notice that I even exist?"

_I don't like you like you, I just like you._

_I don't like you like you, I just like you._

_I don't like you like you, I just like you._

"Lila's nothing but a selfish brat, isn't she?" Arnold thought, realization finally dawning on him. "I can't believe myself! Why didn't I listen to Helga? Lila is worse than Ruth and Summer put together! My whole life I've been chasing the wrong type of girl! Summer was just trying to use me, Lila was trying to manipulate me, and Ruth didn't even know who I was! I can't believe I kept switching back and forth between her and Cecile…I mean, Helga." He stopped at how ironic it all was. "Doesn't it figure that the only girl who's ever truly been nice to me in my entire life is my arch nemesis? I mean…I loved Cecile. I still do. But Helga _is _Cecile, so does that mean…no! It can't be!"

He suddenly thought back to a conversation he had had with Gerald before any of this had ever happened.

_"And Cecile?"_

_"Well…let's just say…"_

_"Lila's got competition?"_

_"You don't get it, Gerald! There wouldn't be a competition! Cecile was the most beautiful, funny, nice, caring girl I've ever met in my entire life! I'd give up Lila in a heartbeat over her!"_

"Then what the heck am I doing?!" he thought. "Helga loves me, I love Cecile, and Helga _is _Cecile!" It suddenly hit him like a ton of bricks. "How could I have been so stupid?!" he scolded himself. "It's so obvious! I love Helga! I always have! Before I even knew that she was Cecil I loved her! I've loved her ever since the first day of preschool, when I first laid eyes on her! I was just afraid to show it to myself or anyone else! Well, not anymore!"


	70. Requited Love

**Chapter 70**

**Requited Love**

"Oh, well," Helga thought, as the fire began to fill the classroom. "It's not like I had anything left to live for anyway." Smoke from the fire stung her eyes, but she wouldn't let them close. "If I have to die, I want Arnold to be my last sight." She stared at him intently, but then…wait, what was going on? Was he coming towards _her_? Maybe the firelight was playing tricks on her eyes or something. But no, there was no doubting it. He was most certainly walking _away _from Lila and _towards _her. Now he was _running _towards her.

"What the heck?" she wondered. She tried again to sit up, and this time she almost succeeded. She probably could have made it out of the building by herself-if Arnold hadn't scooped her up in his arms.

"What's he doing?" Helga thought in amazement. "He's saving _me_? But why?" She looked up at him and almost had to resist the urge to kiss him right then and there in the middle of the blazing fire. "Who cares why?" she thought happily.

Arnold carried her out of the classroom and into the burning hallway. The flames rose high around them, but he bravely walked on. The smoke was almost unbearable.

"I've got to get her out of here," he thought worriedly. Helga started to cough, and he quickened his pace. "Don't worry," he told her above the roar of the fire. "We'll be fine. I'll get us out."

"Stupid football head," Helga thought to herself, fighting against losing consciousness again. "Always having to be optimistic about everything."

"There's the door!" Arnold thought excitedly. "Only a couple more feet!"

But those couple of feet were treacherous. He jumped out of the way as a flaming rafter fell from the ceiling. Helga gasped and turned her head towards him, burying her face in his chest.

Arnold ran the last few feet and finally burst through the door. He hurried away from the school, towards the crowd of kids gathered on the other side of the street. Helga had to close her eyes from the bright sun. It was such a change from the darkened school.

"Hey! You made it!" Sid said when they got over to them.

"What was it like?"

"What happened to Lila?"

"Are you okay?"

"Um, _hello_?" Rhonda said, obviously annoyed. "Am I the _only _one here who can see that he's _holding _her?!"

"Ooh! Do you love her, Arnold?" Harold teased.

"Yes," Arnold thought. "And I have to tell her, but…not here." Then, without saying a word to anyone, he walked away. He wasn't sure where exactly he was headed, but he didn't let that worry him.

Arnold walked for about five minutes, before he found himself at the park. He went inside and walked to a bench that was surrounded by weeping willows, making it almost completely isolated from the rest of the park. He carefully set Helga down on the bench and then sat down beside her.

They sat there for about a minute, neither one of them saying anything.

"Um…are you okay?" Arnold finally asked.

Helga just nodded. She stood up and was about to leave, but she couldn't yet. There was still something she needed to know. Staring straight ahead, she asked softly, "Why did you do that?"

"What, save you?"

She nodded again.

Arnold nervously got up off the bench and walked in front of her. "Well, I…this is kind of hard to say. I don't know exactly how to put it-"

"Don't play with me, Arnold. I know exactly what you're gonna say. 'I like _Li-la_, not you. Why would I like you anyway? You're always mean. Blah, blah, blah.' I don't even know why I told you anything. It's not like it makes any difference. You-you hate me." At this her eyes filled with tears, which she tried hard not to let Arnold see, but to no avail.

"Helga?" Arnold said softly, as he tilted her face towards his, "Don't cry. I never said I hated you. I would never dream of saying that. How could I ever say that to someone like you?"

She looked at him with questioning eyes. "I don't get it."

"Maybe this will make you understand."

Then in one swift motion he grabbed her, tipped her back, and kissed her.

Her eyes opened wide in surprise. She tried to register what was happening, but her senses were too overwhelmed to comprehend anything. Instead she just gave into her desires and melted into the kiss. He began to kiss her harder, and she felt she that she was going to die right then.

After about two minutes, he reluctantly pulled back. It was very fortunate for Helga that she was still clasped in his arms because she almost fainted.

When she finally came to her senses, all she could do was stare up at him and mutter, "Huh?"

Arnold smiled. "Who's dense now?" he thought.

He sat down on the bench again, and she sat down next to him. Then both began to talk at once.

"Look, Helga, I-"

"What was that-"

They both stopped talking.

"You first," Arnold said.

"What on earth did you do that for?" Helga asked, still half in shock.

"You really don't get it?"

She shook her head.

"I love you."

She whirled around to face him. "_What_?!"

"I love you! I don't know why I didn't see it before. I've loved you my whole life! You're the most beautiful, caring, amazing girl I've ever seen, and I'm so sorry that I ever made you think otherwise. Will you forgive me?"

"What?" Helga asked again.

This wasn't exactly the response he was expecting. "I love you."

"Say it again," she demanded.

"I love you, Helga."

"Again."

Arnold smiled at her. "Helga Geraldine Pataki, I love you with all my heart, and I always will."

That did it. Helga collapsed into his arms, crying and laughing at the same time.

"I love you, too!" she cried into his shoulder. "I love you, I love you, I love y-"

He cut her off as he kissed her once again.

Everything was perfect. Absolutely perfect. At long, long last, her love was no longer unrequited.

**THE END**


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